First Time (Star Trek: TOS zine)/Issues 11-20

Issues 1-10 · Issues 11-20 · Issues 21-30 · Issues 31-40 · Issues 41-50 · Issues 51-60 · Issues 61-64

Issue 11

First Time 11 was published in April 1987 and contains 161 pages.

front cover of issue #11, Chris Soto

back cover of issue #11, Chris Soto

The art is by Sarah Leonard, Chris Soto, Shellie Whild, and Jackie Zoost.

• Nom de Plume by Natasha Solten (Humor: Spock asks Kirk for advise on choosing a pen-name. "Okay, so since his suggestion is not offensive to you, I still don't understand what the problem is." "I can think of no other names to use. I thought perhaps you might be of some assistance in this area?" You want me to think up pen-names for you?" Spock swallowed and looked uncomfortable. Then he nodded. "Well, why didn't you say so in the first place? I'd be happy to help." Spock looked genuinely relieved. "I appreciate this very much, sir." "Sir? That won't do. If I'm to be involved in something as personal as thinking up your pen-names, you can at least call me Jim." "Thank you, Jim." The brown eyes rose again.") (4)
• In Celebration by Charlotte Frost ("Kirk is awed by Spockʼs gift to him, but is upset when he discovers that it sprung from one of McCoyʼs verbal jabs at the Vulcan." "Spock's eyebrows indicated his surprise at the direct question, but he answered easily. Because of your sexuality, of course. You are innately heterosexual." Kirk nodded absently, acknowledging the truth of that statement. But he was more interested in having his next question answered. "What about you?" he asked softly. "Are you . . . bisexual?" Spock crossed his arms. "If one were to categorize my sexuality, I believe that 'asexual' would be the most applicable term. While it is true that I have had a few sexual experiences with females, those occasions were under unusual circumstances." He folded his arms and shifted in his chair. "However," he added with lowered eyes, and swallowing heavily, "I would welcome the opportunity to share with you on any level." Kirk gulped. For an instant he'd felt pleased that Spock called himself 'asexual.' But with that last sentence, their relationship suddenly became very complicated.") (10)
• Enterprise Roulette by Angel C. Soie ("To ease the boredom of a boring patrol, the Enterprise crew starts a computerized Lonely Hearts Club that has everyone on board participating.") (30)
• Actions Speak Louder by Sarah Leonard ("Spock is upset by Kirk and Areel Shawʼs kiss on the bridge.") (46)
• Friend, Lover, Brother by Jenifer B ("Three years into their 2nd five-year mission, Spock begins to feel the advent of pon farr but fears telling his captain of his plans to go to Vulcan to bond.") (56)
• The Hunter by Michelle Baker ("Kirk, Spock and the other two crewmembers of the landing party to a newly discovered world begin having erotic dreams.") (86)
• The Last Straw by Roberta Haga ("Kirk and Spock argue over each otherʼs safety.") (102)
• Rock of Ages by Kathy Tipton ("Spock begins to rapidly age after the ship passes through an unknown energy wave.") (106)
• Venus Descending by Jenny Starr ("In order to help Areel Shaw find her younger brother, Kirk takes a drug that makes him younger and sexually submissive.") (126)
• poetry by Alexis Fegan Black, Dovya Blacque, Sue Cameron, Susan Catlin, Sharon Delon, Theresa Hernandez, Robin Hood, Janis E. Laine, Roberta, Diane Seaton, Kathy Tipton, Deann Winter

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 11

See reactions and reviews for Venus Descending.

See reactions and reviews for Nom de Plume.

See reactions and reviews for Rock of Ages.

See reactions and reviews for The Last Straw.

See reactions and reviews for The Hunter.

See reactions and reviews for Enterprise Roulette.

See reactions and reviews for Friend, Lover, Brother.

See reactions and reviews for In Celebration.

See reactions and reviews for Actions Speak Louder.

[zine]: Reams of paper are produced in the the U.S. every year and on that paper, dozens of fan authors and artists express themselves with varying degrees of success. One fanzine which always seems to compile stories and illustrations which reflect the best in fan work is the FIRST TIME series. As this zine has progressed from issue to issue, many fan contributors have grown in their art and still new talents keep popping up, there more than in other K/S zines I've read. FIRST TIME 11 contains a good balance of poetry and short stories many with accompanying illos by several artists. The work is also well balance between more serious tear-jerky types and humorous bits. Without question, the best piece in the zine is Jenny Starr' s VENUS DESCENDING, not because it's terribly unique in its story line, it isn't, however, her style of first person narrative is captivating enough to hold any audience. The plot is the well-worn venus-drug-on-Kirk-to-save-somebody's-butt theme, but she introduces some hair-raising scenes in Bondage and Domination bars in the gay ghetto of Boys Town. Doesn't sound like your cup of tea? Trust me, regardless of subject matter, Starr's style of delivery and her insightfulness into the characters make this story worth the price of the zine. NOM DE PLUME is a clever bit that any fan involved in producing fan literature or editorials is sure to enjoy. IN CELEBRATION offers some insights into Vulcan culture and Spock's interpretation of its meaning of friendship. The characterization of Kirk is particularly good in this one. ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER and FRIEND, BROTHER, LOVER both use old-standard plot lines and they sadly do no do justice to the lustier side of K/S (which, let's be honest, is the main reason we enjoy this stuff!) THE HUNTER is a fun one, though probably not intended to be, I found it laughable in its cute excuse to get Kirk and Spock together. ROCK OF AGES deals with Spock becoming ill, Kirk's guilt and McCoy coming to temrs with their new-found relationship. It is rather heavy in places, but is short enough and hopeful in its tone, which smoothes out the rough spots. Poetry, I have always felt, was used by editors as merely a filler for spaces unfilled with pornographic art or sleazy stories. FIRST TIME 11 contains a poem which disproves my theory. THE BALANCE by Alexis Fegan Black could easily be a story; it leaves the reader wondering about the events discussed and wanting more. Hopefully it will evolve into a short story for the next issue, how 'bout it ladies? FIRST TIME 11 is a nicely constructed zine whose only weaknesses are a lack of art which actually illustrates a story, and a few "stand-by" story plots. The zine contains one strong story in VENUS DESCENDING and a good blend of poetry and stories, humorous and serious. I am continually amazed at fans and how the first encounter theme intrigues them so, but as long as it does, I hope the FIRST TIME series will be there for their indulgence.

Issue 12

First Time 12 was published in June 1987 and contains 157 pages. It consists of two novellas and some poetry. Interior art is by Caro Hedge, Chris Soto, Shellie Whild, and Jackie Zoost, and the covers are both by Chris Soto.

front cover of issue #12, Chris Soto

back cover of issue #12, Chris Soto

cover issue of #12, 3rd edition

• Time is the Fire by T'hera ("Stranded by a shuttle crash, Kirk and Spock are taken prisoner by the natives to by sacrificed to their sun god.") (4)
• Looking at a Rainbow, poem by Faille (64)
• I Wonder, poem by Rhea Gowan (67)
• Desert Wine, poem by Diane Seaton (68)
• Friend's Sonnet, poem by Diane Seaton (69)
• First Time, poem by Robin Hood (70)
• A Man for All Season, poem by Rhea Gowan (71)
• What Cannot Be Cured by Janis E. Laine ("Spock begins to enter pon farr just as the ambassador from a people anathema to Vulcans arrives on the ship.") (72)

• 

  from issue #12, Jackie Zoost for "Time is the Fire"

• 

  from issue #12, Jackie Zoost for "Time is the Fire"

• 

  from issue #12, sample text

• 

  from issue #12, Chris Soto for "What Cannot Be Cured"

• 

  from issue #12, Chris Soto for "What Cannot Be Cured"

• 

  from issue #12, Chris Soto for "What Cannot Be Cured"

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 12

See reactions and reviews for Time is the Fire.

See reactions and reviews for What Cannot Be Cured.

Issue 13

front cover issue #13, 1st edition by Caren Parnes

back cover of issue #13

First Time 13 was published in 1987 and has 171 pages.

The art is by Caren Parnes, by Dragon, Caro Hedge, SBL, Chris Soto, and Jackie Zoost.

• Letting Go by Darla Michaels ("Kirk and McCoy return with Spock to Vulcan when his mother dies.")
• Obsessions by Pat Charles ("A female passenger tries to come on to Spock just as he and Kirk try to begin a relationship.")
• What Can Be Done by Sarah B. Leonard ("Kirk canʼt seem to forget seeing Spock being used by the Klingons and responding to it. Prequel: The Air is the Air.")
• A Dream is a Wish by Yvonne DeChine ("While on shore leave, Kirk persuades Spock to join him in trying “Spin,” a hallucinogenic drug.")
• All He Wished by Cybel Harper ("Spock offers comfort to Kirk after Mitchellʼs death, and a new understanding is reached.")
• His is the Only Music by Elizabeth Scott ("After unknowingly imbibing a drink that causes hallucinations in Vulcans, Spock envisions himself as a long dead ruler and Kirk his human love slave.")
• Two Blind Mice by Brandy Amber Allen ("Spock locates a missing Kirk,only to find he was reverted mentally to a child, spouting nursery rhymes while they try to escape their pursuers")
• Waiting for Rain by Jenny Starr ("Taking the ship from Spock after receiving the message from Starfleet regarding Genesis only adds to Kirkʼs depression.")
• poems by Sue Cameron, Sharon Delon, Anne Fitzgibbons, Jane Fury, Robin Hood, Janis E. Laine, Cybel Harper, Diane Seaton, Ciana Sepulveda

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 13

See reactions and reviews for Letting Go.

See reactions and reviews for Obsessions.

See reactions and reviews for Two Blind Mice.

See reactions and reviews for Waiting for Rain.

See reactions and reviews for His is the Only Music.

See reactions and reviews for All He Wished.

See reactions and reviews for A Dream is a Wish.

See reactions and reviews for What Can Be Done.

[art on page 159, artist: Chris Soto]: This illo shows Admiral Kirk standing over Spock, who is kneeling in a meditation robe. In the center is a larger Kirk figure. All the figures are well-rendered, including the larger Kirk, who is appropriately half in shadow. This shows that he is lost in memory. The light and shadow on the larger Kirk's face also balances in the composition with the dark firepot and the bright flame in the foreground. The smaller Kirk's light Admiral's tunic and Spock's dark meditation robe are balanced as well.

[poem: Festival Fire]: This poem stands out, not only because it's well-written, but because of the subject matter. It shows us a K/S first time in the midst of the orgy-like festival that occurred in the episode "Return of the Archons". This episode is one that is rarely seen in fan fiction, and placing a first time in such circumstances is a fascinating idea. I would love to see a story based on this poem.

[zine]: This zine came to me almost exactly like every other FT -- on time. That is a surprise and a blessing in this day of dissolving preorders. An in, what the editor laughingly calls 'mini tradition 171 pages of good K/S reading falls into your lap when you open the envelope. While this is not the most memorable of the First Times, it does have several stories worthy of note. The first is LETTING GO by Darla Michaels. The story involves the death of Spock's parents and the manner in which he deals with his grief. Kirk, of course, is a integral part of Spock learning how to grieve. The story is well written and tight. The second story that caught my eye was HIS IS THE ONLY MUSIC. Other than wondering where the title came from, I enjoyed the story. It was a little shaky on it's writing and I feel that the author is a beginner. If so, then we have a lot to look forward to. There is talent here. The story was a different approach and with the elusive plot. Kirk has some unpleasant, things happen to him, he blames Spock and the Vulcan leaves the ship. Kirk is left with an aching emptiness that eats away at him until he decides to 'beard the Shelat' in his den. The rest is wonderful. This story is illoed by Jackie Zoost who is improving daily with one of the best pieces I've seen of hers to date. The rich warmth of feeling in both faces of the two 'lovers' expresses what K/S means to most of us. TWO BLIND MICE by Brandy Allen intrigued me. Kirk loses his memory forcibly and is only left with nursery rhymes of his childhood to recite in an effort to retain his sanity. I loved the idea and enjoyed hearing verses of familiar rhymes I'd never heard before. The Kirk is a. sorrowful picture but Spock's efforts to save them both touched me more. There is nothing more endearing than Spock 'protecting' his captain, his friend, his Kirk. The last story that impressed me was by one of my favorite writers --Jenny Starr. WAITING FOR RAIN takes place at the beginning of Star Trek II, The Wrath of Khan. It is a delightful display of writing talent and a complete success. It is not just another K/S story with violence, mayhem or maudlin sentimentality. It is written with thought. Much research went into the quotes alone and they are beautifully integrated into the story line. Ms. Starr knows Kirk as well as any writer in fandom today. She feels his hurts and joys and makes us feel them down to our toes as well. If she doesn't get too clinical and cool, (and she doesn't in this one) she is one of the top three or four writers in fandom today. The Chris Soto illo in this story encapsulates the entire feeling on one page. Chris' pen and inks are masterful. While I enjoy her pencil's, it is hard to beat or even match the cleanness of the black and white medium she most often uses. This illo is incredible. The art in FT 13 is, as always, excellent. Ms. Hood does not simply fill her zine. If the art of, doodle as she calls them, have no place in the poem, or story, then it is edited out. Other zines have more art (Alien Brothers for one) but then looking at that, you'll know what I mean by 'filler'. Chris Soto, SBL, Dragon (who is also improving) and Caren Parnes who did the excellent and VERY different covers, are to be commended. There is nothing extraneous or poorly done here. The poetry was very good. My favorites were by Ciana Sepulveda, Jane Fury and Janis Laine. I have read Ms. Sepulveda before and only wish that could read more. She is not as poetic as many but then I understand and respond to her work more than the more obscure ones. Ms. Fury and Ms. Laine while quite different styles, tell wonderful mini-stories that leave you with a wonderful chill. That's what I like in poetry, I want to feel.

Issue 14

front cover of issue #14, The Southern Cross. This art was displayed at Shore Leave in 1996: "Hope to see most of you at Shore Leave. Remember the original cover of FT 14 will be hung in the art show (they only said no nudity! Men must have made the rules!) I'm shocked that Dovya is willing to part with it, but even if you can't afford it, write her and tell her what a riot it caused. She'll love it."

An excerpt from the story, "Tango." "The room’s attention was riveted on the dancers. The music ended, a deep throbbing Tango began. Kirk felt Spock’s large hand draw him close as it settled firmly in the small of his back, his other hand grasped him in a warm, long-fingered embrace to the side of their close-pressed bodies. The steps were complex, but Kirk felt as though he’d known them all his life as Spock guided him through them. a pressure here, a shift of a finger there. He wondered at himself, wondered what in all the galaxies he was doing on a dance floor with his Vulcan, male first officer when he was supposed to be representing the Federation..."

back cover issue #14, The Southern Cross: "I have heard that the artist actually had some men pose for this particular picture. I'm not sure if that's true or apocryphal [the editor steps in and says 'the drawing is from a publicity photo for a movie about Rudolph Valentino starring Rudolph Nureyev]. Here the fellows are naked, although the pic doesn't show anything explicit. There's a lush background that sort of reminiscent of Persian rugs. But what's so riveting is how Spock is leaning back in Kirk's arms, how Kirk is staring into his face, how Kirk's arm is round about and supporting Spock's head... It's the emotion in almost any great K/S picture that makes it great, and there's lots of emotion and sexuality in this one. One of The Southern Cross's very best, in my opinion."

the movie poster the back page of this zine is based on, see Photo Reference

front cover issue #14, 3rd edition.

First Time 14 was published in 1987 and contains 200 pages.

The zine won the 1988 Surak Award for Best Zine.

The covers by The Southern Cross also won a Surak Award. Interior art is by Dragon, Caro Hedge, SBL, Chris Soto, Shellie Whild, and Jackie Zoost.

• First Time, poem by Carla Menke (1)
• Tango by Dovya Blacque (Surak Award - Best Story) (also in Shadows in the Rain) ("While at a diplomatic reception, Kirk agrees to dance with Spock after watching him dance with the ruler of that planet.") (4)
• poem by Lonetta Ives (14)
• Cradle, poem by Rhea Gowan (15)
• A Flash of Red by Cybel Harper ("Kirk almost dies after being attacked by an unknown crewman but Spock immediately knows of his danger and uses a mindmeld to keep him alive.") (16)
• poem by Lonetta Ives (28)
• Sailing, poem by Anne Fitzgibbons (29)
• The Healing by Charlotte Frost (tied for the 1988 Surak Award for 'Best Long Story') ("Kirk comforts Spock after his aborted pon farr, so then Spock is able to comfort Kirk when he is notified of his nephewʼs death.") (30)
• Master Magician, poem by Shellie A. Whild (97)
• Rhythm and Rhyme, poem by Susan Catlin (98)
• Spur of the Moment by Emily Adams ("Kirk and Spock are enjoying the view in the OD when Kirk, rising to leave, stumbles and ends up in Spockʼs arms.") (100)
• The Lure by T'Hera Snaider ("Spock is given a devise to control the seizures he is having after a head injury and finds that one setting creates fantasies in his mind.") (104)
• poem by Sharon Delon (134)
• Cat Tales, poem by Diane Seaton (134a)
• Green Dreams by D.A. Martin ("After the meld on Melkot, Kirk has dreams of a lover who turns out to be himself.") (135)
• Smiled, poem by Anne Fitzgibbons (157)
• Lions Reflected, poem by Jane Fury (158)
• A Different Obsession by Mary Adelia ("Captain Spock listens to a tape he made several years before of a sexual experience he had with a certain lieutenant dealing with the tragedy on the Farragut.") (160)
• poem by Roberta (200)
• Smiling Eyes, poem by Susan Catlin (201)

• 

  from issue #14, sample text

• 

  from issue #14, Jackie Zoost

• 

  from issue #14, Jackie Zoost

• 

  from issue #14, SBL

• 

  from issue #14, Chris Soto

• 

  from issue #14, sample text

• 

  from issue #14, Dragon

• 

  from issue #14, Jackie Zoost

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 14

See reactions and reviews for Green Dreams.

See reactions and reviews for The Healing.

See reactions and reviews for Tango.

See reactions and reviews for A Flash of Red.

See reactions and reviews for Spur of the Moment.

See reactions and reviews for The Lure.

See reactions and reviews for A Different Obsession.

[regarding the back cover]: I have heard that the artist actually had some men pose for this particular picture. I'm not sure if that's true or apocryphal [the editor steps in and says 'the drawing is from a publicity photo for a movie about Rudolph Valentino starring Rudolph Nureyev]. Here the fellows are naked, although the pic doesn't show anything explicit. There's a lush background that sort of reminiscent of Persian rugs. But what's so riveting is how Spock is leaning back in Kirk's arms, how Kirk is staring into his face, how Kirk's arm is round about and supporting Spock's head... It's the emotion in almost any great K/S picture that makes it great, and there's lots of emotion and sexuality in this one. One of The Southern Cross's very best, in my opinion.

[regarding the front cover]: This portrait of Kirk and Spock dancing the tango takes your breath away. The picture relates to the first story in the zine, but even standing on it's own it's wonderful. You just don't run across very many picture of the fellows dancing these days. A purist might argue that Kirk is too tall in this picture (he is), and the the sweep of the leg is exaggerated (it is), and that the body positions might be a tad feminized (I'm not sure). But in this instance, I'm not a purist, and I just enjoy.

[regarding both covers]: Do you like The Southern Cross' art work? I do. But never have I liked it more than on the covers of FIRST TIME # 14 . These are two of the most erotic, sensual, breath-taking illustrations I've ever seen. The front cover is of Kirk and Spock in tuxes (tails)... dancing with each other! And they don't come off wimpy or 'faggish'. The back cover is of Spock in Kirk's arms amid an array of tapestries and overstuffed pillows and fur rugs.... Beautiful!

[zine]: Robin and her Merry Men have outdone themselves this time of First Time 14. I'm not sure if the artwork enhanced the stories or vice versa, but a vivid picture was certainly painted with Southern Cross' magnificent art on the covers. It was very effective having the illo for the first story, "Tango", knock your eyes out before delving into Dovya Blacque's strongly believable story. A suggestion of Kirk and Spock dancing would not have been the most realistic scenario for me, but Dovya's story make them such equals that it comes off more as a blending of their uniquely complimentary personalities rather than the traditional dominant-submissive, leader-follower pattern of traditional dancing and many K/S stories in general. Another reason that I was so strongly attracted to this story is related to my own personal preference when it comes to K/S. I personally have a very vivid imagination (as do most readers) and have yet to see the movie, play, or picture that can match that which my own mind brush can paint. Therefore, I am not as in tune to the highly explicit nature of many K/S stories. There is a difference between explicit and erotic, and "Tango" fits the latter description and yet nothing is sacrificed because we don't have a microscopic description of the differences in Kirk's and Spock's anatomy. Without a doubt, Southern Cross' artwork on the back cover is splendid viewing, with "green-eyed" pleasure. "Green Dreams" by D.A. Martin is a nice episode sequel (Spectre of the Gun), particularly with the author's nice discovery of the source of his erotic dreams about making love to someone who looks suspiciously like himself. You will have to read the story to find out the context of "green". There is a very nice love scene in the end, once again erotic without being overly explicit. Cybel Harper's "A Flash of Red" puts a little plot back into K/S, some thing which sometimes goes by the wayside in entire ish's of K/S. In a story that could drown in hurt/comfort as Kirk is stabbed by an unknown assailant (hint, that "flash of red"), the author seems to have found a very nice balance of it without getting overly mushy which makes Kirk and Spock unbelievable in my eyes. I liked the way this version of their bonding takes place, with Spock' s concern for his friend outweighing his normally logical, nonemotional rasponse to a crisis which gives birth to desires hidden from each other in the depths of their souls. Perhaps, it is an other "just in the Knick of time" saving of Kirk by his First Officer, but a little "mellow-drama'" forgiven in an otherwise nicely plotted story. Curiosity can often get one in trouble, but in Kirk's case curiosity bring s much more in Charlotte Frost's "The Healing". Kirk's concern for continuing to bring his Vulcan Friend out of his self-imposed shell is caringlv written and easily shows how Kirk's intention to hurt his friend leads to Spock really talking to him. Being caught up in Spock's willingness to talk about his bonding problems, Kirk's curiosity becomes aroused as he becomes the listener. I find that a very believable premise to initiate melding with his friend. One might argue that the meld is too personal an experience for Spock to engage in idle experimentation, but then he, too, has his cat-like curiosity, of the meld's ability to bring pleasure, to satisfy. I do not think the sub-plot with Spocks former friends to be quite necessary --it was like hitting you over the head with a club when a feather will do the same. It came in disjointed from the rest of the story and left me asking, "Now why was that in there?". What I find to be a very interesting turn of events, nicely explaining Spock's alienation from his father, was Charlotte's gut-wrenching scene explaining Sarek's breaking of the parental bond with Spock --very original. Charlotte manages to slip in a nice little "hurt/comfort" scene as further evidence of Spock's blossoming relationship with Kirk in his ability to "open" to the human being of Kirk and the one inside himself. The [word undecipherable] scene was a bit much, but the birthday [word undecipherable] is the perfect prelude to the ensuing honeymoon. The love scene is a pretty [word undecipherable] blend of erotic and explicit surrounded in a [words undecipherable] aura--nicely satisfying.

Issue 15

front cover issue #15, 1st edition, Chris Soto

back cover issue #15, 1st edition, Chris Soto: "A beautiful painting of Spock as a Native American. I am awed by the attention to detail, and the excellent rendering of the different textures—such as the bead texture on Spock's armband and the texture of Spock's feather... I could go on. Spock looks every inch a chief in this illo."

First Time 15 was published in December 1987 and contains 179 pages.

It was nominated for at least one Surak Award.

The art is by Bri, SBL, Chris Soto, Kay Wells, Shellie While, and Jackie Zoost.

• The Human Thing to Do by Sarah B. Leonard ("As his 2nd Pon Farr nears, Spock visits the Shore Leave planet to decide who he will ask to bond with.")
• Soul Search by Jacqueline Vale ("After Omicron Ceti 3, Spock is surprised by Kirk as he masturbates.")
• Lessons - Emily Adams ("After noting a change in Kirkʼs reaction to women, Spock asks for lessons in beginning a relationship.")
• Listen and Learn by Maria Surah ("Spock and Kirk discuss the gossip Spock overheard regarding a relationship between the two of them.")
• Burden of Shadows by Janis E. Laine ("After Ekos, Spock is haunted by a childhood trauma that threatens his dawning relationship with Kirk.")
• Firebird by Jane Fury ("Spock is stranded with “Kirok” after beaming down alone to the planet to rescue Kirk when the Enterprise is disabled.")
• poems by Anne Fitzgibbons, Jane Fury, Cybel Harper, Janis E. Laine, Shellie Whild

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 15

See reactions and reviews for Lessons.

See reactions and reviews for Firebird.

See reactions and reviews for Listen and Learn.

See reactions and reviews for Burden of Shadows.

See reactions and reviews for The Human Thing to Do.

See reactions and reviews for Fantasy Prince.

See reactions and reviews for Soul Search.

[art on page 159, artist is Chris Soto]: This is a touching illo of Kirk and Spock in Native American costume during the novella, "Firebird", with Spock leaning his head against Kirk's chest. The geometric pattern on Kirk's headband is echoed in the background. Both of these, and the pattern on the frame look like Native American blanket patterns. Spock's expression and the disordered hair on his right side indicate subtly that Spock is still unwell. He has only recently emerged from healing trance at that point in "Firebird".

Issue 16

First Time 16 was published in March 1988 and contains 162 pages. It is a single novel called, "Crystal Clear" by Roberta Haga.

It has art by Chris Soto (lots) and one piece by Paul Haga.

front cover of issue #16, Chris Soto

back cover of issue #16, Chris Soto

issue #16, 2nd edition

From the editorial page: "REMEMBER!! If you didn't buy this zine from this address [redacted] or from an over-wieght blonde, they probably bought it from a xeroxer and you got took!"

Summaries:

"The Enterprise rescues a felinoid female from a smugglerʼs ship and soon after all the males on the ship begin to have a reaction that causes all of them, including the captain and first officer, to be constantly sexually aroused."

From The Zine Connection #34: "The Enterprise beams aboard a beautiful, female, alien animal. Confusion reigns on the ship. Everyone is being driven mad by lust, lasciviousness, and love... Our boys fight the power being exerted upon them: fight it mightily, but fortunately, they lose...."

Excerpt:

"You have discovered the reason behind my condition, Doctor?" Spock asked as soon as he'd stepped inside McCoy's cabin two and a half hours later. "Have a seat, Spock." McCoy waved him in the general direction of a couple of chairs. "Want anything to drink?" "No, thank you." Brown eyes were intense and McCoy felt his knees quivering under the stare. "Do you, or do you not, have a specific reason for requesting my presence this evening?" McCoy sighed in resignation, claimed a chair of his own, deliberately waiting until Spock had seated himself. "I know what is causing your symptoms. All the tests show you're perfectly healthy. However, it seems you have acquired a slight case of . . . " he swallowed, " . . . love." Brows soared through the black bangs and McCoy would swear to his dying day that the hair on the Vulcan's forehead had actually moved from the impact. "I BEG your pardon!" McCoy swallowed again. Spock was as close to being a pure, unadulterated Vulcan as he'd ever seen him and the doctor was trembling inside in reaction to the flaming eyes daring him to repeat his absurd statement. "There's nothing wrong with you. You're just in love." "Are you attempting an ill-conceived joke, Doctor?"

"Why would I joke about something like this?" "I am Vulcan," Spock insisted."

• 

  from issue #16, Chris Soto

• 

  from issue #16, Chris Soto

• 

  from issue #16, Paul Haga

• 

  from issue #16, Chris Soto

• 

  from issue #16, Chris Soto

• 

  from issue #16, uncredited

• 

  from issue #16, sample text

• 

  from issue #16, Chris Soto

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 16

[art by Chris Soto]: This is beautiful art. each piece so striking. The front and back covers, with the crystal motif, and six drawings, Chris' technique is so subtle; her Kirk and Spock faces are so clear and strong, so...there. They feel so divinely matched; these two are one.

Not to mention her Kirk and Spock bodies. First is a gorgeous nude Kirk, lying on his front on a bed, head resting on his hands, staring off deeply into his alone-thoughts. Then an exquisite Kirk close-up against the stars, and we see. again, he is a man of deep feeling. And Kirk and Spock together; Spock right where he should be. at Kirk's shoulder, so there for him.

The next one I had seen when I leafed through before reading, and I just couldn't wait to get to that scene. I sure don't know how Kirk could contain himself, seeing Spock for the first time in this scene; Spock in barely-clothes (when in Rome,..) with braided leather thongs around head and bicep.

And Kirk and Spock together against backdrop of stellar stuff; lovely. Then, chest-up Kirk and Spock nude, with the most beautiful, small smiles. By now in the story, they definitely have not been containing themselves.... Making us "believe" Spock smiling is an art, and this one was just perfect.

[zine]: What do you get when you cross a mysterious cat named Crystal with the crew of the Enterprise? Tribbles with hairballs? Crew members with a craving for catnip? No, more like crew with a craving with each other. Roberta Haga's novel "Crystal Clear" in First Time 16 turns the Enterprise in to the "Love Boat" of space. Upon rescuing the kidnapped felinoid whom McCoy names Crystal for her clear sapphire blue eyes, the male crew of the Enterprise fall in love under the spell of a mysterious ailment which renders them more interested in love than war with Kirk and Spock no exception. Much to McCoy's delight, Spock's pointed ears once again get him in trouble when Crystal decides that he bears a striking resemblance to her mate and enthusiastically tries to overcome Vulcan reticence and dignity with her very visible display of affection. n their quest to return Crystal to her questionable place of origin, the cause for the loving CATastrophe eventually becomes PURRfectly clear in this light, loving tale that is guaranteed to entertain. Chris Soto's artwork in the 'zine continues her tradition of providing some of the most beautiful portraiture of Kirk and Spock. This 'zine cried out for some artwork that portrayed the feline guest star since Roberta's crisp characterization of Crystal painted such a vivid, detailed picture of her. (The editor explained this as the artist's aversion to cats!) Roberta's dialogue moved fluently and reflected much of the humor that is such an integral part of what Star Trek is all about. I found that very refreshing. The author also manages to keep our heroes true to their original character, easily recognizable in their relationships with on another as the characters that the fans have grown to know and love. She has managed to weave the plot back and forth with a smoothness characteristic of her stories and writing. The format used for this story made reading much easier and gave the 'zine a polished look. All things considered, "Crystal Clear" is a loving story, in the First Time tradition, which leaves the reader purring for meow-ore---er, more!

[zine]: CRYSTAL CLEAR by Roberta Haga is a refreshing novel, numerous, endearing and sexually charged. Like almost all of Ms. Haga's previous pieces, this story is based on an unusual premise. An interesting being is removed from her planet by an unscrupulous group of individuals and, by a twist of fate, she ends up on board the Enterprise. There she inadvertently causes her own brand of havoc, while Kirk and his crew try to find out where she's from and return her. The plot is well defined, as is the sub-plot which is the first time aspect of the story. Characterization and dialogue are very well done and believable. In addition, the writer invests the main characters with a gentle loving quality that harks back to aired Trek and the movies without falling into the trap of being syrupy. Although this is Ms. Haga's first novel, it is to be hoped that it is not the last. There is an originality and verve to her writing that grabs the reader's interest and holds it to the very end. If there is anything to be said on the negative side, it is an occasional problem with lax grammar. However, this in no way detracts from the story. Illustrations for CRYSTAL CLEAR were all done by Chris Soto including the covers, and dove-tail quite nicely with the story. Although not highly erotic in nature, they are lovely and one, in particular, of Kirk should cause a few palpitations in the reader's breath. Altogether, I highly recommend this zine. It should please even the most finicky of readers.

[zine]: This is a light, thoroughly entertaining novel. I was lucky enough to get an original and got the wonderful Soto art, so let that be a lesson to you. From the first page to the last, written as only Roberta can, images and K/S in character. If you haven't read this, you're missing a lot of fun. I'll quote the editors flyer (since it's easier). "The Enterprise beams aboard a beautiful, female, alien animal. Confusion reigns on the ship. Everyone is being driven mad with lust, lasciviousness and love. Our 'boys' fight the power being exerted upon them. Fight it mightily, but fortunately, they lose." Crystal is a fell, easy read. Exciting, extremely well written ....

[zine]: One scene in this novel has managed to engrave itself on my memory. Kirk and Spock are in the officer’s mess, along with McCoy and other crew members, when something suddenly happens between them – a spontaneous bonding! This is such a unique idea and is written with such intensity and clarity, it seems like a very plausible thing to me. It is memorable because of where it occurs - in a public area and with only an innocent touch to trigger it. With this one scene in mind, I pulled the zine off the shelf and plunged into it with relish. It was an accidental and very special coincidence that I reached the pivotal scene just before midnight on New Year’s Eve.

The plot, other than the passionate and slowly expanding love affair, involves a female member of a heretofore unknown felinoid species who has fallen into the custody of the Enterprise crew. They are quite fond of her and are committed to returning her to her own kind. While she is not developed to the point of communication, neither is she wild, but the things her scent does do human males is definitely on the wild side. To say that all the men on board become quite amorous would be a grievous understatement. Try persistently horny. It’s amusing and a little weird that no one catches on to the reason for so many new pairings and the all night marathons. Maybe no one wanted to believe it was an outside influence and not their own prowess. This added a bit of whimsy to the story, but there was nothing whimsical about what was happening between Kirk and Spock. It was enthralling and enchanting. If you prefer instant gratification for them, this is not the story for you. They are both walking on eggshells, which gives us countless moments of tenderness and the stuff that makes your heart contract and your breath catch in your throat.

In short, it is a superb novel, especially if exploring a compelling and beautiful love affair is on your agenda.

[zine]: Real quick review of CRYSTAL CLEAR, a K/S novel by Roberta Haga. Gorgeously produced with desktop publishing, 160 double-column pages, with a few full page illos - not too many to detract from the narrative, enough to entice. The price, I believe, was $18, and it's worth it. The reading is smooth and delivers what the K/S reader is looking for without the oft intrusive sense of reading pornography. The language in the sex scenes is not grunt-and-gutter, but literate and to the point. This, together with the excellent repro makes the 'zine a real pleasure to read. The novel itself is structured to hang entirely by a single thread of conflict, though, and that may in fact be its most unsatisfying flaw for the veteran K/S reader. The only Kirk/Spock conflict line is the very old, teen-romance one of they both feel that way but won't say anything about it." Both Kirk and Spock independently arrive at the conclusion that they are in love, but each is afraid to declare himself to the other for fear of rejection. All consideration of parental opinion, command image, homophobia, bonding complication, or the simple problem of settling a "Tomcat" down to one mate, is ignored. There is a nice subplot involving a sub-intelligent alien animal, about to evolve to civilization, but nothing is really done with that dramatically. The animal, while- aboard the E, gives off sexually arousing pheneromes that threaten to trigger Spock's pon farr - but never does. Plot-wise, that's a major flaw because the issue was brought up and highlighted. The other big plot flaw is an episode buried in the middle of the novel but not really attached to any other plot development. All the men on the boarding party that first encountered the alien animal comes down with a virus that covers them in purple spots. This puts Kirk and Spock in an awkward situation as they are both confined to sickbay for quarantine. They never solve the problem of the virus, and nobody else comes down with it - not even when they later must deal with a planet where an artificial virus has wiped out all the females (of a telepathic species that bonds sexually). There are a great many truly vibrant premises sprinkled through this novel, but they are not all brought together into a single, neat - ahem - climax. There's nothing original said about the K/S relationship. Despite all that, the novel is a clean, smooth, enjoyable read, and I do suggest that even those unable to shell out $18 for the novel engrave the name ROBERTA HAGA on their minds and grab anything else under that byline. When she masters novel structure, 3he's going to be one of the very, very best writers around because she has a tender sensitivity that the field really needs.

[zine]: Even though this story has been out a while, it's still great reading over and over. I loved the story, as it was a very endearing and sexually exciting novel. The characters and dialogue are wonderful, as it keeps going to the end. This is a first novel by the author. I highly suggest it to even the normal zine readers.

[zine]: This is a light, thoroughly entertaining novel. I was lucky enough to get an original and got the wonderful Soto art, so let that be a lesson to you.

From the first page to the last, written as only Roberta can, images and K/S in character. If you haven't read this, you're missing a lot of fun. I'll quote the editors flyer (since it's easier).

"The Enterprise beams aboard a beautiful, female, alien animal. Confusion reigns on the ship. Everyone is being driven mad with lust, lasciviousness and love...

Our 'boys' fight the power being exerted upon them. Fight it mightily, but fortunately, they lose. Crystal is a fell, easy read. Exciting, extremely well written...

Issue 17

front cover of issue #17 by Caren P

back cover issue #17, 1st edition by Caren P

cover of issue #17, 3rd edition

First Time 17 was published in May 1988 (a month after the previous issue) and contains 199 pages. It has interior art by Dragon, Caro Hedge, Chris Soto, Kay Wells, and Shellie Whild.

• First Time, poem by Cybel Harper (1)
• Five Days by Emily Adams ("Shore Leave Between ST:TMP and ST:TWOK. "We have dinner, and we talk about our day, and neither of us will say anything about how we feel or about the subject that is uppermost in both our minds, each other.") (4)
• Glory Days, poem by Cybel Harper (9)
• Carved in Stone by Kay Wells ("Kirk poses for a portrait, unaware that the artist uses his paintings to create nude statues of the subject.") (10)
• Dragon Light, poem by Robin Hood (31)
• Sweet Disaster by Elizabeth Scott ("After pon farr together,Spock rejects a bonding with Kirk out of fear of the effects on him.") (32)
• In Hand, poem by Tere Ann Roderick (63)
• Forests of the Night by Ciana Sepulveda ("Spock Searches for Kirk on a Romulan planet after Kirk is abducted by Orions and sold into slavery.") (64)
• Journeys of the Night, poem by Robin hood (155)
• When, Look at You, Endless Night, poems by Cybel Harper (156)
• Needles by Janis E. Laine ("Kirk and Spock make love while hiding in a haystack from the Klingons.") (157)
• Night Spirit, poem by Tere Ann Roderick (163)
• Who's Too Old, poem by Carol Turner (164)

• 

  from issue #17, Dragon for "Five Days"

• 

  from issue #17, Shellie Whild for "Carved in Stone"

• 

  from issue #17, Shellie Whild for "Carved in Stone"

• 

  from issue #17, Chris Soto for "Forests of the Night"

• 

  from issue #17, Chris Soto for "Forests of the Night"

• 

  from issue #17, Chris Soto for "Forests of the Night"

• 

  from issue #17, Chris Soto for "Forests of the Night"

• 

  from issue #17

• 

  from issue #17, Chris Soto for "Forests of the Night"

• 

  from issue #17, Kay Wells for "Needles"

• 

  from issue #17, Chris Soto

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 17

See comments for Forests of the Night.

See comments for Five Days.

See comments for Needles.

See comments for Sweet Disaster.

See reactions and reviews for Carved in Stone.

Issue 18

cover issue #18, 3rd edition. Note: This image has been marked as sexually explicit and has been minimised.

front cover of issue #18, Gayle F. Note: This image has been marked as sexually explicit and has been minimised.

back cover of issue #18, Gayle F. Note: This image has been marked as sexually explicit and has been minimised.

First Time 18 was published in June 1988 and contains 177 pages.

The interior art is by DEW, Dragon, Caro Hedge, Pat Horowitz, SBL, Chris Soto, and Jackie Zoost.

From the editorial: "I have to inform you (notice I didn't say WARN?) there is a story -- NOON TOMORROW, that is a death story. Don't panic! I told you ahead of tome AND, believe me, you'll hate yourself when all your friends are talking about how wonderful it was and you don't have the faintest idea what they're talking about. Yes, it is a death story and yes, in my opinion, it is a happy ending, (but keep the tissues handy!) in fact, there couldn't be any other way to end it and I'm sure you'll all agree. Okay, don't read it, see if I care!"

Also from the editorial: "DON'T BUY A XEROX OF THIS ZINE. THE ORIGINAL IS A MUCH BETTER INVESTMENT. Apparently our campaign is working: the little copier person WASN'T at the last con! Thanks girls! Keep up the good work!"

• These Things I Would Do - Emily Adams. (After Spock is rescued from imprisonment, Kirk decides to give Spock a loving experience of sex. "Kirk spoke, not even bothering to open his eyes. "When you've been as close to death as we were, do you ever think of things you wish you'd done or places you wish you'd seen or things like that?" "Yes," the Vulcan answered.") (4)
• San Francisco, poem by Cybel Harper (24b)
• Until Tonight by Peter Silverton ("The Night after Pon Farr. "I don't really know what I expected, but I think I was surprised to find you were not alien. Not really. How could we all have misjudged you so? Especially me, your closest friend? I've known you almost two years and I don't think I really knew or understood you until tonight.") (25)
• Eridani's Daughter, poem by Janis E. Laine (28)
• The Souvenir by Kay Wells ("McCoy Gives Kirk a Vulcan dildo as a joke, assuming he and Spock are lovers.") (29) (winner of a 1988 Surak Award)
• The Night of the First Day, poem by Dovya Blacque (46)
• Other Games Besides Chess by Sharon Pillsbury ("Spock reprograms the thermostat in Kirkʼs cabin in order to force him to stay in Spockʼs cabin and bed for the night") (47)
• The Dance, poem by Cybel Harper (60)
• Understand, poem by Cybel Harper (61)
• One Small Berry by Elizabeth Scott ("Kirk enters himself as a bondmate for Spock as they return to Vulcan to meet the candidates there.") (62)
• After the Fire, poem by Dovya Blacque (75)
• Noon Tomorrow by Addison Reed ("AU: Kirk becomes a patient in an alien asylum after Spock dies on the crash on their way to their bonding.") (76)
• Soul of Dreams, poem by Robin Hood (91)
• Reflections in a Warped Mirror by T'Hera Snaider ("Kirk dreams of killing an A/U Spock while in Tholian space.") (92)
• Without a Word by Dagmar Buse ("Kirk is surprised by Spock while he masturbates.") (116)
• The Propine, Perfect Love, Asked for More, three poems by Marion Graham (135)
• A Thousand Times by Mara Lynn Cade ("Kirk is chosen as a “Token” by an alien ruler and must submit sexually to him, causing Spock to think it was consensual when he finds out.") (136)
• The Song, poem by Cybel Harper (162)
• Query, Repartee, poem by Marion Graham (163)
• Dear Mom by Roberta Haga ("Kirk writes to his mother of his unhappiness due to Spockʼs departure for Gol.") (164)
• Explain to Me, poem by Cybel Harper (176)

• 

  from issue #18, Dragon for "These Things I Would Do"

• 

  from issue #18, Sarah B. Leonard, for the poem "Eridani's Daughter" by Janis E. Laine

• 

  from issue #18, DEW for "The Souvenir"

• 

  from issue #18, DEW for "The Souvenir"

• 

  from issue #18, DEW for "Other Games Beside Chess"

• 

  from issue #18, Jackie Zoost for "One Small Berry"

• 

  from issue #18, Pat Horowitz for the poem, "After the Fire"

• 

  from issue #18, "Dear Mom"—first page

• 

  from issue #18, Dragon for "A Thousand Times"

• 

  from issue #18, Dragon for "A Thousand Times"

• 

  from issue #18, DEW for "Without a Word"

• 

  from issue #18, Chris Soto for "Reflections in a Warped Mirror"

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 18

See reactions and reviews for These Things I Would Do.

See reactions and reviews for Noon Tomorrow.

See reactions and reviews for Dear Mom.

See reactions and reviews for The Souvenir.

See reactions and reviews for Without a Word.

See reactions and reviews for Reflections in a Warped Mirror.

See reactions and reviews for One Small Berry.

See reactions and reviews for Other Games Besides Chess.

See reactions and reviews for A Thousand Times.

See reactions and reviews for Until Tonight.

[zine]: Viva la plain brown wrapper! Which is exactly what you're going to need if you plan to carry this zine along to the dentist's office! The covers are, in two words, gorgeous and sexy, and I loved them ... but it's STUFFY reading in that closet. If you can get past this Gayle F. artwork, so me of her best and most realistic, you'll find a veritable garden of delicacies inside. TIHESE THINGS WOULD I DO, This story is one I like, and though familiar, it wasn't tiring or boring at all. Spock's reticence and discomfort was well depicted. Both of Dragon's illos were excellent. Especially intriguing was the alien landscape with its upside-down civilization. And last but not least, I love it when they discover each other! Made me feel good all over. Written by newcomer Peter Silverton, UNTIL TONIGHT was a different approach, yes. A widely read fellow I'm acquainted with says we women write entirely unlike men (in other words, sloppy), but how are we supposed to know how a guy feels? Maybe we could have a longer story next time and experience the same positive and living feeling that Peter generates in this one. It's hard to think of something diverse in the K/S realm these days, but with THE SOUVENIR, Kay Wells has done it, and how! This was different - humorous, but with an underlying poignancy because of the truth this unlikely souvenir brings to light. In one page, called THE NIGHT OF THE FIRST DAY, Dovya Blacque gives us a nice look at the not so god-like Captain Kirk facing everyday fears like the rest of us mortals. Okay, I'll admit it, I'll never get tired of those sensuous yet innocent massages? That's one of the OTHER GAMES BESIDES CHESS itemized by Sharon Pillsbury. A smile was generated by Spock's emphasis on some of Kirk's more innocent words - a nice turnaround from the norm - but I had to hee-haw at the unexpected tangle of Spock's tongue when the match got a little heated. Hilarious! You can see the green flush! And then my heart went out to him at his painful thought, "yes, I need you ... ". Spock devotees will enjoy this portrayal for the remainder of the story as well. While ONE SMALL BERRY didn't suit my image of characterization as well as some, or maybe the character's reactions to the situation, Elizabeth Scott's orginal "selection process" was intriguing and created some nice moments of anticipation. REFLECTIONS IN A WARPED MIRROR began in another era and my taste doesn't normally run to warrior stories, but since T'Hera Snaider turned this one into a dream of sorts, it was more to my liking and does give the reader a sample of both worlds. One of the most beautiful portraits you're likely to find of an uncivilized Spock was contributed by Chris Soto. WITHOUT A WORD is a beautiful expression of love. No words are needed and Dagmar Buse proves it with a total absence of dialogue. It was especially nice to experience the ongoing story throught the eyes of both participants. One viewpoint would have been good. Two was better. Mara Lynn Cade's A THOUSAND TIMES kept my attention, and to be quite honest, one of the central characters, The Pehta, gave me the creeps. Add to this the fact that Kirk's physical symptoms and mental distress following his subjection to the alien's rather distasteful invasion of his body was very well expressed, and one is left feeling absolutely filthy (that's realism enough, thank you). Good reading. . .. DEAR MOM is just waht the title implies: a series of letters from James T. Kirk, ghost-written in this case by Roberta Haga. Dovya Blacque's hand-written interpretation lends just the right touch, making it almost like taking a clandestine peek at something one shouldn't! Who could resist? A refreshing change, very insightful and intimate on a diffferent level than we are accustomed to seeing. When the idea of doing this review was born, it seemed only right that I at least skim through the zine a second time. This turned out to be far from a chore as I was soon absorbed once again in the art, the poetry and the fiction. Can there be a better recommendation? In the interest of fairness, let me warn you at this point that there is a contribution of my own in FT 18. If you disregard it while reading as I have in reviewing, I think you'll still agree that Robin Hood has done it again, confirming my thoughts that FIRST TIME, from issue number one right through the current offering, should be on the shelves of every K/S fan-towards the front, in easy reach.

[zine]: As usual, the first thing I noticed - and the first thing I think of when I think of FIRST TIME - about this issue of FT was the cover art. Beautiful, sensual, explicit pencil work by Gayle F is becoming a trademark for FT. And this is one of Gayle's best, especially the back cover! especially the back cover! No one draws K and S the way Gayle does inside FT #18 is the usual mixture of very good, good and unremarkable stories, art work and poetry. THESE THINGS WOULD I DO by Emily Adams is an odd situation with a satisfactory, if somewhat cliche, resolution. After sustaining Injuries on a landing party. Kirk and Spock discuss those things they'd always wanted to do but had never gotten around to doing. Predictably, Spock wants to experience sexual intimacy... and Kirk obliges after some predictable machinations. OTHER GAMES BESIDES CHESS by Sharon Pillsbury is another very predictable story line in which, through trite situations and the obligatory misunderstandings, Kirk and Spock find the solution to their unhappiness in one another's arms. A nice, uninspired yet enjoyable story. THE SOUVENIR by Kay Wells is the first in a group of what I would call "strange" stories in FT #18. McCoy brings a "souvenir" back from shore leave for a Kirk he thinks is mooning over Spock who is away at a conference. This "souvenir" is intended as a joke but has very serious overtones which start Kirk thinking... and later cause Spock to come to some odd conclusions of his own. While I thought the premise of this story in poor taste, I must say it was a refreshing change to come across something this unusual in a FIRST TIME. REFLECTIONS IN A WARPED MIRROR is an A/U story that really isn't. Kirk has a very vivid dream In which an alternate version of himself mistreats an alternate version of Spock in ways that threaten Kirk's waking reality. Again, the solution to the dilemma Is predictable, but this is a very unusual story with a satisfactory solution. An interesting read. My least favorite stories were A THOUSAND TIMES by Mara Lynn Cade and UNTIL TONIGHT by Peter Silverton. A THOUSAND TIMES involves Starfleet officials forcing Kirk's hand in either taking on a highly unsavory assignment himself or delegating the humiliating task to Spock. Of course Kirk takes it on himself but the aftermath is taken out on Spock. The solution to the turmoil is well done, but I found the entire situation not only unbelievable but terribly unbelievable. While there is nothing 'wrong' with UNTIL TONIGHT, there Is also nothing 'right'. This is a simple retelling of dozens of other "discovery" stories in which either Kirk or Spock "discover- their love for the other. There is nothing offensive in this little story, it's just very dull and ordinary. My favorite story is WITHOUT A WORD by Dagmar Buse. While this is not the most complex or well-written story I've ever come across, it is well told and paced. Accidentally, Spock comes across Kirk who is engrossed in a little self-gratification. The results of this accidental meeting felt very natural to me, the situation didn't seem forced or contrived... something that Is difficult to do given the premise. NOON TOMORROW by Addison Reed reminds me strongly of something out of THRUST or SUN AND SHADOW or even an early issue of NAKED TIMES. This, the editor warns us, is a 'death' story. But it is so touching, so well-written, that the "death" aspects are, in this case, something to recommend the story rather than something to steer clear of if that sort of thing bothers you. I won't ruin the story by discussing the plot here, but I do recommend that, even if you usually stay away from "death" stories, you read this one. DEAR MOM by Roberta Haga is a charming little piece (hand written to add just the right spice to the story) consisting of a series of letters from Kirk to his mother discussing his feelings for Spock. I really enjoyed reading this. I found most of the poetry in FT #18 unremarkable with the exception of AFTER THE FIRE by Dovya Blacque which is all the more lovely because of the beautiful Pat Horowitz Spock that accompanies it. Other art that stands out is a Kirk by DEW on page 54 and a Spock by Chris Soto on page 93. First Time #18 stands up well when held against the other more recent issues of FT, but each time I pick up a new issue, I find myself hoping that it's more in the first seven issues of FT. This is not a bad zine, in fact, I recommend it, but more interesting plots that are better written would be greatly welcomed.

Issue 19

back cover issue #19, 1st edition by Marilyn Cole

front cover issue #19 by Marilyn Cole -- "We must mention Marilyn Cole for her lovely covers. I've held off a while in using these since I didn't want you to get confused with some of the other zines she frequently works with. But since she's cut back on her artwork lately and you won't see as much.... I had this idea and well, you know. Here they are anyway. Aren't they... intreguing? [sic]. Okay, So TELL HER SO!!"

First Time 19 was published in September 1988 and contains 183 pages.

It won several 1988 Surak Awards.

The interior art by Dragon, Caro Hedge, Sarah B. Leonard, Chris Soto, Suki, Kay Wells, and Jackie Zoost.

From the editorial: "This zine shouldn't insult anyone who believes in IDIC and if they don't then the hell with them!"

• First Time, poem (1)
• To Catch a Unicorn by Robin Hood ("Finding love on a planet of intelligent “horses”.") (4)
• Chains, poem by Cybel Harper (6)
• Sunless Sea, poem by Jo Hardy (7)
• The Ewing Syndrome by Janis E. Laine ("Spock daydreams of what could be while preparing to beam down on Vulcan for his marriage to T'Pring.") (8)
• Fear of Night, poem by Ciana Sepulveda-Mitchell (15)
• Assumptions by Kay Wells ("Spock and Kirk are forced to have sex in order to appease the god of a primitive culture while stranded on their planet." -- "A sea of reddish-brown humanoids, becoming more numerous by the minute, jumped around excitedly, emitting sharp grunting sounds and baring sharp pink teeth. They appeared quite identical, each head topped with a flopping ball of frizzy orange hair.") (16)
• Fairy Magic, poem by Anne Fitzgibbons (43)
• Unforgiven, poem by Chris Soto (44)
• Secrets of the Heart by Cybel Harper ("Kirk doesnʼt understand why Spock has been acting so tense around him." -- "What's wrong with him, Bones?" Kirk asked as he paced back and forth across the doctor's cabin. "What's wrong with who?" "Spock, of course," Kirk said, as if the answer should have been obvious. Of course, the doctor thought with a mental sigh. Who else?")
• In the Name of Love by Charlotte Frost (After Spock is sexually tortured, Kirk teaches him self-gratification.") (46)
• Goodbye, poem by Cybel Harper (91)
• The Seed of Truth by Marion Graham (After the fal tor pan, Kirk decides to not repeat the mistakes and missed chances of the past between him and Spock.") (92)
• Love in a Vacuum, poem by Cybel Harper (97)
• Star Vow by Charmen Tramen ("After VʼGer, Kirk demands to know Spockʼs reason for leaving him at the end of the five-year mission. "The Vulcan motioned to a chair.") (98)
• Blended Blood, poem by Robin Hood (108)
• Last First Time by Elizabeth Scott ("Spock repeatedly removes Kirkʼs memories of their times together at Kirkʼs request.") (110)
• Thin Ice by Emily Adams ("Kirk sees similarities of his relationship with Spock in a “movie” the whole crew had been telling him to see, so he asks Spock to see it.") (136)
• Born to Fire, poem by Jo Hardy (155)
• River Rising by Martha Selena Brown ("Kirk has hysterical amnesia and paralysis after an accident.") (156)
• Gift, The Tip, poems by Sarah B. Leonard (182)
• If Your Heart Were the Prize, poem by Janis E. Laine (183)

• 

  from issue #19, Suki for "River Rising"

• 

  from issue #19, Kay Wells for "Assumptions"

• 

  from issue #19, Chris Soto

• 

  from issue #19, Dragon

• 

  from issue #19, Sarah B. Leonard for "In the Name of Love"

• 

  from issue #19, Jackie Zoost for "Seed of Truth"

• 

  from issue #19, Dragon for "Thin Ice"

• 

  from issue #19, Dragon for "Thin Ice"

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 19

See comments for Thin Ice.

See comments for River Rising.

See comments for In the Name of Love.

See comments for Assumptions.

See reactions and reviews for To Catch a Unicorn.

See reactions and reviews for The Ewing Syndrome.

See reactions and reviews for Last First Time.

See reactions and reviews for Star Vow.

See reactions and reviews for The Seed of Truth.

See reactions and reviews for Secrets of the Heart.

Issue 20

back cover issue #20, 1st edition by Chris Soto (from Velvet Deceptions)

front cover issue #20, 1st edition by Chris Soto (from Velvet Deceptions)

First Time 20 was published in December 1988 and contains 199 pages.

It won several 1988 Surak Awards, including Best Art on the covers by Chris Soto.

Interior art is by Alayne, Dragon, Chris Soto, and Kay Wells.

• First Kiss, poem by Tere Ann Roderick (1)
• Semantics - Emily Adams (Spockʼs understanding of a new culture from the lack of certain words in their language leads to him and Kirk being able to finally understand what their feelings for each other really are. "But, Spock, how could you know that your life wasn't in danger? These people this whole civilization goes against every belief we have. How could you trust G'Thendis that way?" "Because their customs and mores differ considerably from our own does not automatically prove them to be without honor.") (4)
• Velvet Deceptions - Robert Haga (novella) (A/U: Kirk, a ranger in Starfleet, is assigned to transport a prince of Vulcan to his marriage but is surprised by an adult Vulcan he thinks is there as “the kidʼs” guard. "A shadow slipped through the moonlit night, making its way soundlessly through extensive and well- manicured gardens to a large, ornate verandah. There was no reason to worry about its being seen; still, the shadow entered through a side door to slip unnoticed into the huge, three-story house. "Where the hell have you been?" came the instant greeting upon the female's recognition of her caller. Captain James Kirk chuckled, bent to place a kiss on one perfumed shoulder, then pulled one hand across the woman's flat abdomen as he stepped into her spacious four-room suite. "Is that any way to greet your favorite lay?") (10)
• Goodbye, poem Cybel Harper (88)
• The Rest is Silence, poem by Tere Ann Roderick (89)
• No Better Mirror - Charlotte Frost The author says it was inspired by The Gol Letters by Carlin Thorne in Naked Times #18. (After VʼGer, Kirk and Spock work to rebuild their friendship, which eventually shows itself as the love they have both denied. "Kirk lay on his bed, listening contentedly to the humming of the engines. His hands were folded across his stomach and his eyes were open, staring into darkness. For a moment, he could almost imagine that everything was as it used to be. Almost.") (90)
• I Love Dreaming, poem by Tere Ann Roderick (127)
• Snowbound - Janis E. Laine (Kirk invites Spock to his cabin for shoreleave where both, unaware of what the other plans, try to further their relationship. "No." "What?" "No, Sir," the Vulcan amended. "But look, Spock," Jim Kirk coaxed, "it'll only be for three days. How much trouble could we possibly get into?") (128)
• God Rising, poem by Robin Hood (141)

• King of the Shimrah Raiders - Addison Reed (Abandoned on the planet he had been sent to on a covert mission, Kirk survives as leader of the people there until Spock arrives. "The basis for the succeeding account, translated from the native, was found hidden in the Hall of Archives of the planet Tohhran during an expedition ten years following the rescue of its civilization from the Klingon Empire, Federation Stardate 3187.0. It details the daring attempts to repel the Klingon forces by a small group of rebels headquartered in the hostile Shimrah Mountain Range. And of their mysterious leader, the man they called King.") (142)
• Brother to a Dragon - Dovya Blacque [Also in Shadows in the Rain]. (Kirk is upset when he suddenly finds out that Spock has a brother, Seth, who Kirk meets at an exhibit of the manʼs artwork. "A lie by omission is still a lie. I cannot say why I never spoke of this, why I never told Jim about Seth. Perhaps if I had, matters would never have occurred as they did; perhaps the confusion and feelings of betrayal and guilt would have been avoided for us all. Yet, the truth . . . . Yes, the truth is that I never spoke of Seth, not to Jim . . . nor to anyone else.") (172)
• A Visit from St. Nicholas, poem by Janis E. Laine (199)

• 

  from issue #20, sample text

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  from issue #20, Kay Wells for "Velvet Deceptions"

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  from issue #20, Kay Wells for "Velvet Deceptions"

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  from issue #20, Kay Wells for "Velvet Deceptions"

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  from issue #20, Chris Soto for "Velvet Deceptions"

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  from issue #20, Dragon for "King of the Shimrah Raiders"

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  from issue #20, Alayne for "Brother to a Dragon"

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  from issue #20, Dragon for "King of the Shimrah Raiders"

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  Kay Wells is the artist for Snowbond. Note: Marked as sexually explicit; minimized. -- "My god! Even though I'm no K/S-erotica virgin (or any other kind), this drawing about made me faint. Kirk's penis, Spock's mouth. Beautiful."

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 20

See reactions and reviews for King of the Shimrah Raiders.

See reactions and reviews for Semantics.

See reactions and reviews for No Better Mirror.

See reactions and reviews for Brother to a Dragon.

See reactions and reviews for Snowbound.

[zine]: While there are only 6 stories, the zine is over 200 pages and reduced at that. Ms. Hood has outdone herself this time. From the incredible covers by Soto to the last story by Dovya Blacque, the zine is more than a good read. It is an excellent read. If you think you've been burned out by K/S, then this is the zine for you.

SEMANTICS is short but fun. Kirk and Spock get caught in the tangle of word meanings. It's the trip, stumble and above all, the fall that's the most fun!

SNOWBOUND while certainly a well used story line, is saved by its excellent writing and great ending.

NO BETTER MIRROR by Charlotte Frost is a long story that tells the first year in Kirk's and Spock's relationship. It is well written, not exciting but leaves the reader with a sweet feeling. One of Charlotte's better stories.

BROTHER TO A DRAGON by Dovya Blacque, I understand written before the plot to ST V was known, is poetry as only Ms. Blacque can write, in a different style, witn an understanding of Spock that surpasses most, she opens his closed personality with ease, giving us a most unusual glimpse into Vulcans and that special one even more. Surak nomination? There are a lot to pick from in this zine.

VELVET DECEPTIONS Alternate universe characters that go with the glorious covers and while not the traditional Kirk and Spock, Ms. Haga manages to keep them completely within my ideas of their character. Long haired, and wild, Kirk is still James Kirk and you will love this story. Hot and steamy!

KIRK OF THE SHIMRAH RAIDERS by Addison Reed. I thought that in WTM, Second Action by the same author would be unsurpassed this year, I was wrong. This story has heart, writing, nice art by Dragon, a scruffy Kirk and above all, PLOT! A definite must for anyone on the edge of burnout. This zine, printed on what appears to be a laser printer, is slick and thick. My vote for the best of year.

[art by Kay Wells on page 140]: My god! Even though I'm no K/S-erotica virgin (or any other kind), this drawing about made me faint. Kirk's penis, Spock's mouth. Beautiful.