Tabula Rasa (Marvel story)
| Fanfiction | |
|---|---|
| Title: | Tabula Rasa |
| Author(s): | Aelara_Vayne |
| Date(s): | April 2021–ongoing |
| Length: | 162 chapters; 480.234 words (WIP) |
| Genre: | M/M, Bucky Barnes/Helmut Zemo |
| Fandom: | The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel Comics |
| External Links: | Tabula Rasa on AO3 |
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As of November 2023, Tabula Rasa is the longest fanfic of Winterbaron pairing in The Falcon and the Winter Soldier fandom. The fic is the ninth installment of ex cineribus resurgam series by Aelara_Vayne and the primary focus of the series. It has the highest kudos, bookmarks, and hits stats among other Winterbaron fanfiction on AO3.
While it is based on The Falcon and the Winter Soldier TV series, this fic also includes a lot of elements from Marvel Comics for what happens after the canon events. The story is divided into four arcs: Arc One (chapter 1-24), canon; Arc Two (chapter 25-53), post-canon part one; Arc Three (chapter 54-85), post-canon part two; and Arc Four (chapter 86-ongoing), post-canon part three.
If Bucky thought there'd be no price to pay for pretending to be the Winter Soldier again, he was wrong. When you can't trust your own mind, who else is there?Tabula Rasa Summary
Inspiration for the Fanfic
The fanfic title (meaning Blank State) came from behaviorism theory of psychology which the author used to speculate on how HYDRA first brainwashed Bucky Barnes. While writing this fic, the author was hugely inspired by Bucky Barnes | The first nightmare fanvid by The-LittleFangirl and Post Traumatic music album by Mike Shinoda.
Fanfic Length and Update Speed
Starting in April 2021, this story kicked off with a rapid update pace and impressive length, reaching novel-length within the fifth day and surpassing 200k words within the first month. It used to be updated several times in a month until October 2021 (Chapter 161). While writing this fic, the author was also working on the prequel and other installments in Tabula Rasa Universe on a much slower cadence.
There's a book out there called "The 5 Day Novel." Well, this story just crossed into novel-length on Day 5.Author's Note, Chapter 15 (2021-04-25)
Fun fact for the evening: This fic is now longer than The Catcher in the Rye, Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, or The Picture of Dorian Gray.Author's Note, Chapter 24 (2021-04-29)
Also, I'm pretty sure this breaks us through 200k? Woo! Right on the 1-month mark! Fic length factoid: We just passed the Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (198k words). By 257k words, we will surpass the last Harry Potter book. But the fic would need to reach 455k words to pass the entirety of the Lord of the Rings (all 3 books, minus the Hobbit). (Obviously with no comparisons to the quality of the literature lol.)Author's Note, Chapter 62 (2021-05-19)
This chapter officially pushed the word count past the longest Harry Potter book (Order of the Phoenix). The next big milestone is probably Anna Karenina by Tolstoy at 350k words. I had the realization that I really should have broken this into 3-4 smaller stories along the way because the word count will start to put people off at this point. But that's 20-20 hindsight. :)Author's Note, Chapter 83 (2021-05-31)
Woo! 300k milestone! I remember when I tried to bully myself with imposter syndrome into ending this at chapter 24. I have given up trying to estimate how long the story will end up. I used to look at 300k fics like "woah, I'd never be able to do that".Author's Note, Chapter 99 (2021-06-11)
I always tend to cross numeric thresholds with big chapters on accident. But here's to 400k! (Which is funny because I thought this story would be 50k tops when I started.)Author's Note, Chapter 122 (2021-07-05)
Tabula Rasa is currently on hiatus at a word count of 480k (Chapter 162). The story will not get regular updates until the prequel - auribus teneo lupum - is completed.
Yes, for those who only read this story and not any of the other ones in the universe/series, I am not dead! I've been back for a short while working on finishing ATL (the prequel) because it's nearly done. If you don't read that or are not in the discord, more or less I've had a horrible ~7 months, but this story was never at risk of getting abandoned. [...] TR still won't get regular updates until ATL is done, but it's really very close. They've just finished the Madripoor bar scene, so it's almost linked up to where TR starts. After that's done, I will be getting back to regular TR updates. :DAuthor's Note, Chapter 162 (2022-04-22)
Reactions and Reviews
Ejhskwjsjs. Ok so I rarely comment anymore because it makes me anxious. But Holy fucking shit. This is amazing. I'm obsessed. The vibes? Immaculate. I'm in a f&ws discord and someone literally just sent in the winterbaron channel "new Tabula Rasa chapter posted" because we've been fanning over it today and let me tell you I now know how the winter soldier feels when Zemo runs his reward protocol. Instant rush of dopamine my dude. I did my little happy dance and everything. I cannot even begin to tell you how amazing this is. From the characterization to the in-depth introspection , the way your brain works is literal art. This fic is so immersive. The switch between Bucky and the WS is so subtle. The way you write his internal monologue switches so smoothly. Your writing style in general is just *chefs kiss* perfect. It's so fluid and artful and yet so uniquely your own style. Also hey please don't burn yourself out. I am absolutely enthralled with the amount of chapters you're turning out, but remember to take care of yourself! I used to binge write and now I left one of my fics on a cliffhanger like 3 years ago and I have no intent on resolving it because I developed super bad imposter syndrome lmao. Please don't repeat my mistakes. As a psych major, I really enjoyed reliving my intro class in this chapter. My stupid little gifted kid burnout brainrot got so excited that I knew what you Zemo was talking about. Anyways, I'm ranting here but I love this fic and I love you and please know that you live rent free in my head. As much as I hate that phrase.a Reader on Chapter 7
I'm so in love with this chapter, I mean it's so human-like to struggle with those intrusive thoughts as Bucky about his friends, I mean how many times I thought the same about people I care about - that maybe they just trying to be 'nice' - maaan I know that though. And it's so beautiful to be able to identify a bit with those characters and join mentally to this perfectly-dysfunctional superfamily <3 Oh, and you were writing about your impostor syndrome and about taking care of yourself mentally so maybe you need to hear it: this fic help me a lot in quarantine and in a COVID-time of almost total isolation from my friends, and I'm really thankful for it because feeling that I'm actually doing something (I mean reading and more - reading in a foreign language) was my daily little victory over blues and this plot and characters are so healing for my psyche and so calming and comforting, so thank you so much for them! <3a Reader on Chapter 36
jesus fuck you just keep delivering!!! THIS is a bold choice but THE ONLY ONE THAT MAKES SENSE FOR FORWARD PLOT. i keep expecting this to get to a point where i stop being absolutely riveted but !!’ surpise!’!!! not yet!!! augh tomorrow’s updates can’t come soon enough.(also—655 pages, longer than most long books, still increasing forward momentum and audience captivation. the 8th world wonder.)a Reader on Chapter 93
Dear Aelara, it’s such a pleasure to read this wonderful story for the third time! TR is my go-to comfort WB fic and I’m so glad there’s so much of it to reread every single time! I anticipate all my favorite parts all over again and get to find new favorite scenes, and understand some nuances bettera Reader on Chapter 162
Discord Server Community
The author refrains from replying to the comments on AO3 due to nervousness. However, spurred by interest from the readers, the author founded a discord server as a space for interacting with the regular readers. As of November 2023, the server has 50+ members.
We had some discussion in the comments of the last chapter about potentially forming a discord if there was interest. I know there are already Winterbaron discords that I meant to join but talked myself out of joining from social anxiety, but I figured there was no harm in checking interest. Absolutely zero pressure, just curious! :) More tomorrow!Author's Note, Chapter 101
There sounded like there was some interest in a discord, so I'll take a look at that tomorrow. :) If nothing else, it'd be cool to chat with some regular readers now that I'm less terrified of everyone!Author's Note, Chapter 102
Okay Discord for this fic is minimally set up and can be found here. It's super barebones because I don't know how much engagement it will get, but it's a place to chat even if we only get a few. Once again, no pressure at all to join and it's not connected to the bigger Winterbaron or FATWS discords (though I'd be happy to link/pin them in it). My only request is we keep things friendly and respectful!Author's Note, Chapter 105
Works Inspired by Tabula Rasa
Fanfiction
- So Weak a Word (So Strong a Feeling) by Sparcina: I blame (with love) Aelara's Tabula Rasa-shaped hooks in my own brain for the pleasure-protocol headcanon that sneaked into this story.
- Trusted by Memeology:This work is directly related to Tabula Rasa created by Aelara_Vayne, and all credit goes to her creating a universe where my desperate WinterBaron imagination could run wild.
- cras amet qui nunquam amavit; quique amavit, cras amet by orphan_account: Inspired by and set in the Tabula Rasa universe, during and after chapter 146. Fundamentally based on that canon, but not canon itself.
- Peccatum Cogitationes by MultiFanFics: Part of the Tabula Rasa universe, set in chapters 41 and 42 of the main fic and as a prequel to Delectatio Morosa.