The Bedside Grope and Queen Grope

Zine
Title:	The Bedside Grope/Queen Grope
Publisher:
Editor(s):	Ann Looker
Date(s):	July 1981
Series?:
Medium:	print
Size:
Genre:	het
Fandom:	Star Trek: TOS
Language:	English
External Links:
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cover of "Bedside Grope" -- Mike Eason

flipped over, the cover of "Queen Grope" -- Gordon Carleton

title page

The Bedside Grope/Queen Grope is a 42-page explicit het Star Trek: TOS double-issue zine published in England. It was edited by Ann Looker. Printed on 11x17 paper and folded, center stapled. It is a flip-over zine.

This zine is part of the "Grope" series.

The first Gropes were cheaply printed due to the editor's access to printing facilities at her job. "Bedside Grope and Queen Grope" had to be printed elsewhere as the the editor no longer had the original job. This meant it cost more money, and in the editorial, she wrote:

... I wouldn't like regular readers to think that all the great cost and enormous expense of this issue means that we have to start taking it seriously. GROPE is a joke and, I hope, always will be.

Submission Requests

Contributions of stories or artwork appreciated BUT 1) I like a piece of writing to be a story with a PLOT rather than simply a turn-on 2) Some of the sexiest stories I have read are some of the least explicit. I prefer them that way. Same goes for artwork. As suggestive as you like but my printer suffers from heart trouble, and I don't want to give him a heart attack.

GROPE LIVES; The new issue of Grope will definitely materialise some time next year. It has been 2 years since the last issue, KING GROPE, and many new writers have appeared on the scene since then. I am sure there must be plenty of STAG members who have stories that are too naughty for LOG ENTRIES. If so send them to me and I'll consider them for GROPE. For those newcomers to the GROPE scene - GROPE has a reputation for printing stories with actual plots. I don't like six page blow-by-blow accounts of sexual get-togethers. It must be an actual story containing implicit or explicit scenes of turgid sex or having some other feature that makes it GROPISH rather than LOG ENTRYISH or ALNITAHISH. Regular readers know what I mean! Humorous stories are very welcome also. Another point: some of the sexiest stories I have read have also been some of the most restrained. There is no need to go over the top in explicit sexual descriptions (unless you really want to!). All fans have marvellous imaginations and are perfectly capable of filling in those parts that an author may be too reticent (or have too much good taste) to describe explicitly.) In other words I am looking for dirty stories in fairly good taste! So, if you want to see another GROPE, start digging out those hidden stories or get sharpening your pencils,.., probable title for the next issue:-THE BEDSIDE GROPE. Material to me as quickly as possible so I can get the accepted stories illustrated.

In 1994, Free for the Postage

In 1994, Ann Looker was looking for a good home for copies of this zine:

Interested in a free bedside Grope? In the 70s and early 80s the GROPE series was probably the best known adult Trekzine in the UK. A mixture of sex and humour, it even got its editor a free trip to the States, courtesy of the Star Trek Fan Fund, voted for by American readers. I haven't advertised GROPE for 10 years and the remaining copies are languishing in a cupboard. If you would like to save them from the local recycling plant then send postage only (75p in UK stamps) to Ann Looker... A minority of stories are K/S and an age statement is required when ordering. A few copies of other issues are also available at 70s prices. Send SAE for details.

Regarding the Character, Pris Ramsbottom and Early Characterizations

From the editorial:

I told Audrey Baker that we wanted to know who Pris Rambottom was. (cf. LOST DECADE in GROPES OF ROTH) She unearthed the story that introduced Pris and here it is.

A word of explanation might be in order here. About ten years ago, before fandom or fan fiction was well-established in this country, Audrey wrote a sequence of about 100 stories. She developed the series and characters entirety in her own way. There are some unusual features and characterisations and Audrey has often offered to revise them for publication. But I prefer to print them as written on the assumption that other fans will find them as fascinating as I do.

I keep getting letters asking far more Audrey Baker. Hence there are two of her stories in this issue - one K/S and one not, to suit all tastes. Incidentally, I don’t think Audrey approves of pon farr, leastways she doesn’t let it cramp Spock's style! Which makes a nice change...

Table of Contents

Bedside Grope

• Tomcat by Martin Sherrif (Kirk and Spock are taken captive and turned into pets by a feline alien race, Spock has sex with a female feline which Kirk observes. Later, Spock is embarrassed, but Kirk is very understanding and brings up IDIC.) (female feline/Spock, Kirk) (4)
• The Tribble Makes Three by Cherrie Bronwell (Christine’s fantasies about Spock while holding a tribble.) (10)
• Interlude for Amusement by Audrey Baker (Spock/Pris Ramsbottom) (12)
• Perchance to Dream by Beth Hallam (Engineer Balthazar Hallam dreams of making love to Uhura, and of her sucking his big toe, but it turns out to be a cat named Augustus instead. ) (23)
• Do Not Disturb by Tina Pole (Kirk and Rand are making love, but Kirk is irritated by all of Rand's hairpins in the bed.) (Kirk/Janice Rand) (also in Tickled Pink #3) (24)
• The Back Streets of Rigel, poem by Val Douglas (25)
• Both Sides Now by Margaret Draper (Admiral Stella Mayhew/Kirk) (Kirk and Spock are close; it is insinuated that they are lovers. Kirk invites a woman, Admiral Stella Mayhew, who he feels might advance his career to spend the night with him, and sends Spock away. Spock can hear them through the cabin walls as Kirk denigrates Spock, "My loyal Vulcan -- kick him and he comes back for more... To hell with Spock." Spock feels humiliated, then angry, and makes plans to leave the Enterprise and go back to Vulcan. "The five year mission was over.") (This is very much a companion story to Both Sides Now, also by Draper) (25)
• art by Mike Eason (cover), Alan Hunter, Steve Carr, Robin Hill, Barbara P. Gordon, Beth Hallam, Gordon Carleton

• 

  from "Bedside Grope" -- Steve Carr

• 

  from "Bedside Grope" -- B.P. Gordon, portrays original character, Priscilla (Pris) Ramsbottom

• 

  from "Bedside Grope" -- B.P. Gordon

• 

  from "Bedside Grope" -- Alan Hunter

Queen Grope

• Blue is the Colour by Theresa Holmes (Humor: Kirk and Spock are lovers, and both like to wear women's lingerie.) (Spock/Kirk) (3)
• Afterthoughts by Martin Sherrif (Post-Star Trek: The Motion Picture, Kirk thinks about Spock's return, how they used to be lovers until Spock became ashamed.) (Kirk/Spock) (4)
• Intermezzo, poem by Theresa Holmes (5)
• The Preacher by Audrey Baker (Kirk and Spock are lovers until a powerful alien that looks like Abraham Lincoln turns them against each other using public shame and Kirk's insecurities.) (Kirk/Spock) (6)
• Poetic Licence by Vivien Young (Kirk and Spock are on a beach while on vacation. They start to have clumsy sex, but Spock ejaculates prematurely. Kirk is upset and frustrated, Spock is humiliated. They agree to maybe try later.) (Kirk/Spock) (14)
• Both Sides Now by Margaret Draper (This is very much a companion story to Both Sides Now) (16)
• art by Gordon Carleton (cover) and Alan Hunter

• 

  from "Queen Grope" -- Alan Hunter

• 

  from "Queen Grope"

Reactions and Reviews

All are long out of print and difficult to obtain. I sincerely hope that #8 won't be the last, since I quite enjoy the sly humor and artwork, and the offbeat but mature writing. You won't find any too serious/dramatic, overwritten, overly sentimental, sophomoric tear-jerkers here. The editor herself said, in the "Editor's Postscript" to SON OF GROPE: "...the zine as a whole is not meant to be taken seriously, though certain individual stories may bring a tear to the eye, a lump to the throat, a wrench to the gut, or up yesterday's dinner! GROPE began as a light-hearted romp and, I hope, will continue in that spirit. The stories and poems...do not necessarily reflect the views of the editor nor are they intended to present a workable Star Trek universe—not even I think that the big E can function with its First Officer permanently on heat!" Some American readers may find some of the British writing hard to get used to. It should be noted, too, that the majority of stories are not K/S. In this case, the ability to appreciate Infinite Diversity certainly pays off!

Reduced offset in that odd 8 x 12 sized paper our Brit cousins use. Has a wrap-around heavy cover, with a really nasty Gordon Carleton cartoon on QG (picturing K and S as ugly transvestites ; luckily the likenesses are so poor you hardly know them) and a Mike Eason illo on the other side.

Features the usual whimsical writers of Ann's stable, including Audrey Baker, Beth Holmes, Martin Sherrif, Cherrie Bramwell, Tina Pole and Val Douglas. All the material in this zine series is satire or broad humor, and usually most enjoyable with their peculiar English slant. Sherrif's "Tomcat", wherein Kirk loses the title to his F.O. after himself being kept as a housepet by an alien species, has a deft touch, while keeping the characters firmly in their recognizable roles. The two Audrey Bakers, "Interlude for Amusement" and "The Preacher" are up to their usual standards. The latter concerns the machinations. of a hell-and-brim-stone cleric who uses his talents to inflame the crew of the U.S.S. Copernicus against their temporary top officers— Kirk and Spock — and their "Unnatural relationship". "Interlude" continues the long tradition of bumbling Marysues with caps set for Mr. Spock—with Priscilla Ramsbottom achieving more success than most. All in all a fun zine, strictly for laughs, well worth its modest cost.

The Gropes

• Grope (June 1976)
• More Grope (November 1976)
• Son of Grope (February 1977)
• Deep Grope (May 1977)
• The Gropes of Roth (May 1978)
• King Grope (September 1978)
• Grope Flashback (May 1980)
• The Bedside Grope and Queen Grope (July 1981)
• Graveside Grope (May 1983)