The Rest of the Garbage

Zine
Title:	The Rest of the Garbage
Publisher:	Z.P. Florian
Editor(s):
Date(s):	1995
Series?:	yes
Medium:	fanzine, print
Size:
Genre:
Fandom:	Star Wars
External Links:	WBM Link Author's website
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Issue #1

the back cover, making the cover a wraparound one

the disclaimer and the illo "Luke of the Posies"

flyer

The Rest of the Garbage is an adult het and slash (none of it Han/Luke) 190-page Star Wars anthology. It contains extensive art by Z.P. Florian, one illo by Nicola Pearce, and cartoons by Fritz.

On the cover "Floating away with the rest of the garbage."

This zine got a The STAR aWARd honorable mention.

Series

• The Rest of the Garbage #1
• Revenge of the Garbage #2
• The Return of the Rest of the Garbage #3
• The Menace of the Rest of the Garbage #4
• The Clone of the Rest of the Garbage was proposed but never issued, see archived online flyer

Awards

It won a StarWard honorable mention for best Star Wars zine in 1995.

"First, a deep bow and thank you for voting for The Rest of the Garbage — didn't even think it'd be on the ballot, let alone get honorable mention. I was kinda hoping to score with "Rancor Delivery" , but not the zine. (Yes, the glazed look in my eyes was tears.)"

In the Beginning

For the record, I do enjoy heavy erotica, unexplored interracial, interspecies sexual adventures, including slash, provided it is well written. But there is as much excitement in exploring the "luminous being" as in fondling the "crude matter", so I don't mind going either way! I was toying with plans of making a SW zine in defiance of the "Lucas Purity Policy" (I planned to call it "The Rest of the Garbage") and I found out that the idea was highly unpopular.

I don't know what I'm gonna do with "The Rest of the Garbage" -- I'm still ambivalent about it. I think I'll do some live investigation at Lansing about a PG to X-Y-Z rated zine, see if I'd get contributions and some help with editing (I'm willing to do all the slave work, and now that I'm more familiar with computers, I can turn out decent pages, but my grammar stinks). I don't know if I wanna do it because I wanna do it, or I wanna do it just because it's not done (the incorrigible rebel rides again...).

A 1995 Flyer

From a flyer printed in Only Hope #3:

I am pleased to let you know that The Rest Of The Garbage, a collection of R and X-rated stories, poems and illustrations will be available in May, for the mature adult friends of Z.P. Florian. It contains two hundred pages of excellent work from fifteen illustrious contributors, most of them writing under a nom deplume to protect their reputation. It is a rich, well balanced mixture of Han, Luke and Vader-Anakin stories.

Please do not buy this collection if you are not a connoisseur of graphic violence, sex, strong language, occasional slash and the Dark Side.

The Rest of The Garbage is an one-shot effort, there has never been and probably never will be anything like it. It is not going to be sold anywhere. Copies will be printed exclusively for those who order it now.

Editor's Comments

From the zine's preface:

All right, this is it. I'm not quite sure it was a wise idea to make this zine, considering the flak it will surely get. So why do it? because the "why not" was a very compelling reason. Maybe the Dark Side made me do it. But before you decide that I' ve done the unforgivable, consider that this is a very big Galaxy, as Han Solo said, who had certainly seen a lot of strange things. Well, this zine might be one of those. Enjoy it. Further apologies: This is an entirely amateur publication. No one ever made a red cent on it. It has no copyright and has no intention to hurt anybody else s copyrights. It is intended for a small circle of private citizens, and should be taken about as seriously as a late-night conversation between friends.

From the zine's afterword:

Afterword, from Z.P.

Thanks for all your Locs... and for all the votes that earned GARBAGE a honorable mention as best SW zine at StarAwards. I have not even expected the zine to get on the ballot, considering that it was a mile off the mainstream, let alone getting an award for it. And since it wasn't a very snazzy-looking zine, I must say that the award had to be for the stories in it - so all the contributors should walk tall and look happy....

From the website:

At that time SW erotica was an anathema for a good number of fans. But plenty of people wrote erotic stories made erotic drawings... But they were keeping them in their desk drawers maybe showing them to a couple of very good friends. I wanted to have a zine to make those stories available for those who believe that there's sex in the SW universe in all shapes and forms. I thought I'll get a lot of flak but it wasn't nowhere near as bad as I expected.

From a letter of comment:

I understand the need to respect Lucas' wishes to keep the sandbox clean -- although with all the really bad books published lately, I think the sandbox is getting a bit muddy; can't think of anything more morally offensive than Han and Leia's children being raised by some babysitter! My zine will not be sold to anyone who might not know what it is. Again, I must say that it is not nearly as daring or as explicit as all this excitement makes it seem. But not publishing it is out of the question, because we are talking about splendid, excellent, well- plotted stories that more than deserve to be read. As so aptly put it: "It's all a matter of having the means and the right to choose." So, if someone chooses to read it, they will have to ask me next May for a copy. In order to protect the innocent, The Rest of the Garbage will not be advertised in any zine.

An Ad

In Southern Enclave:

Plain brown wrapper over color cover, hopefully. No taboos whatsoever. Contributions wanted: adult, mature, hot, erotic, fascinating, anything goes as long as the characters are in character. Prefer short to medium stories. Erotic poems, drawings and cartoons welcome. I accept anonymous contributions from shy people. In case of pen names kept confidential. Sex in the stories is not mandatory, excessive trashing also fits the profile. Slash is ok. I'm especially interested in explorations into the sex life of the various species, the clash (or match) of different cultures. Floppies or hard copy accepted.

Contents

• A Learning Experience - Z.P. Florian (Anakin Skywalker can't resist to have an affair with Palpatine's mistress, he's discovered and as a punishment, he's buried alive with the woman in a well designed to cut off his access to the Force, he's expecting Palpatine to save him, but his Master's mercy is almost too long in coming. Warning -- Rated R for adult situations. First appeared in The Rest of the Garbage 1995.)

• Intro
• The Great Goddess Addresses the Subject of Hurt/Comfort by Alicia Maria Susanna Fox (reprinted from Xenozine #3)
• Corellian Courage, Jedi Justice by A. Gettim (1)
• Goddess Blessed Solo by Laryssa Strangepassion sung to "GodBless Texas" by Little Texas (17)
• A Learning Experience by Z.P. Florian (19)
• Storms and Visions by Anne Stefan (30)
• Fertility Rites by Space Fox (40)
• One Enchanted Evening by Z.P. Florian (45)
• Trust by Kirk Stormm (47)
• Union by M. Barrassed (70)
• Kidstuff by Fritz (74)
• Homecoming by Anne Stefan (80)
• It's All in the Mind by Kirk Stormm (94)
• Special Modifications (101) (A Han/Chewie fic)
• Defeat by Elizabeth Stuart (105)
• Cabin Fever by Cheree Cargill (Han and Leia are stranded in an emergency shelter on Hoth. It's going to take a lot of body heat to survive the night.)
• Unholy Trinity, poem by ZP Florian (131)
• Discoveries by Laryssa Strangepassion (132)
• Sisters by Bam Bam (151)
• A Weeknight at Jabba's Palace by Z.P. Florian (159)
• A Corellian in Hell by Mud Dwarf (169)
• Corelli Mother's Advice Song by Maggie Nowakowska (Tune: Maids, When You re Young, Never Wed and Old Man) (172)
• Daisies by Elizabeth Stuart (173)
• The Perils of Profiction (or "If Lucas Were to Have His Way") (175)
• Azar-wand by Z.P. Florian (181) (sequel to "The Women in His Life" in I Have a Bad Feeling About This)
• Cold Comfort, filk by Maggie Nowakowska (Tune: Anything You Can Do from ANNIE GET YOUR GUN) (186)
• One of the Best Pieces by Z.P. Florian (Revised - originally published in Hibernation Sickness) (189)

• 

  interior page, art by Z.P. Florian, "The Great Goddess Addresses the Subject of Hurt/Comfort" by Alicia Maria Susanna Fox (text reprinted from Xenozine)

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian, for "Unholy Trinity"

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian, for "Trust"

• 

  interior page, Nicola Pearce

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian, for " Special Modifications"

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian, for "Homecoming"

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian

• 

  interior page, parody, from "The Perils of Profiction (or "If Lucas Were to Have His Way")"

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian, "Cold Comfort, filk by Maggie Nowakowska (Tune: Anything You Can Do from ANNIE GET YOUR GUN)

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian, for "Trust"

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian, "Anakin" from "A Learning Experience"

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian, for "Corellian Courage, Jedi Justice"

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian, for "Union"

• 

  interior page, by Z.P. Florian

Reactions and Reviews

People like me - with dirty minds - have been waiting for a zine like this for a looong time! My favorite story was "Homecoming" by Anne Stefan. When I saw the artwork for this story I almost had a hormone overload. Tamaris between Darth 's knees... Storywise, I loved the governor/courtesan Tamaris. She was actually able to shock Vader by telling him women lusted after him. Duh! I hope to see lots more of their adventures. My next favorite stories were the "Anakin in the well" pair. Again the artwork was stunning, especially the portrait of Anakin with loose long hair. The well itself was well-described (ha!) if horrific. What better way to torture errant Jedi. Lost of the other stories were fun, some pretty silly. Loves Luke and the Glossom. Loved the butt-shot artwork of Luke and the Skylar. The most disturbing story was "Defeat" by Elizabeth Stuart. I 'm not sure I'll ever be able to read that one again. More artwork kudos - the Han in "Best pieces", yum. Luke as a slave boy, double yum. Put me down for more garbage!

I felt I had to write and tell you how much I liked the zine and the illoes and stories. From reading the stories I felt that most of them must have been written by girls. Many of the stories had a very feminine touch that was absolutely wonderful.

My favourite story is "Kidstuff". I just can't say one thing: that's typical of Skywalker. But all the other pieces I've read are great, too. Hot stuff, but absolutely great. I 'm sure you'll also get negative responses, but to me the zine really is something special.

I enjoyed all the stories, the poems were good and the artwork was VERY nice. All of the stories were well done. I didn't fell like there was a clinker in the bunch and I felt that they were enhanced considerably by the adult content and frank language. Being primarily a fan of Han Solo, I preferred those stories which focused on him. "A Weeknight at Jabba" was very good, very well done slash -I like slash if it's done as kind of a sideline for Han, but not the preferred orientation. "Discoveries" was another good read, along with "One of the Best Pieces", both showing Han as the sensitive and sexy guy he is. "Corellian Courage,. Jedi Justice" was a fine hurt-comfort, but I have to admit that I sometimes wonder why I like this genre as much as I do. "Trust" was my favorite Luke story, "Kidstuff" and "The Perils of Profiction" were both good fun. And "Daisies". That one moved me. But alas, poor Wedge! He wanders into the Temple of Doom without a Short Round. Dear me.

My favorites are "One Enchanted Evening" (absolutely cute whodunit...so who was it? ) "Daisies", "A Corellian in Hell" (can't you please do something to coax the Mud Dwarf into making it a long, long story???) and "Corellian Courage". Now this one could have been a lovely bit of slash, too, and I kept hoping it'd turn out that way for some time- oh well, still it's well written and I like it a lot. I did have kind of a problem with "Defeat" though, which caught me completely off guard. I really don't mean this to sound reproachful or anything, but that story certainly shook me up like nothing I've ever read before in fan fiction. Maybe it's just that although I usually enjoy reading hurt/comfort, there has to be some comfort in it for me to be enjoyable, and "Defeat" is all dark and utter despair. Please don't get me wrong, I think that story is well done and it does pick up some rather sinister implications from ROTJ, which is probably the major reason it felt so real and scary. I forgot to mention "Azar-wand" ( and the drawing that goes with it) add that to the above list of favorites, I think it's heart-rendingly beautiful, really love that one. I must add I was surprised not to find a single piece of Han/Luke slash in "Garbage".

Well, uh, what can I say about this one. No, I am not embarrassed to say that I read it. This zine was very well done and the art was tastefully done to go with the stories. I will comment on a few of my favorites. I think my absolute favorite must have been Z.P.'s "Azar-wand". This story was wonderfully done and, I suppose I am a romantic at heart, I hope she does a continuation to this story in the next issue. I can see this happening to Luke and it would be interesting to see how some of the loose ends are resolved. "Sisters" -I have to admit to knowing who wrote this one and you hit it right on. I loved it! Cute interpretation of the Holy Spandex. Luke would look positively delicious in it! "Pitfalls of Profiction" -oh, you are cruel. I almost fall of my chair laughing when I read the last paragraph. 90, huh? What a hoot! While this next story is not my cup of tea, "Trust" was well written and the situation was handled wonderfully.

The Rest of the Garbage is absolutely, unequivocally stunning. The illoes are beautiful. I love the sultriness that comes across in your Lukes ( as well as his creative costumes), and Anakin! (I am fanning myself to keep the temperature down.) "The Great Goddess" is charming and funny. "Corellian Courage" was trashy and spooky. Fascinating touches about the Force and the Emperor \s energy. "A learning experience/Storms and Visions" : what an interesting idea and what a cold, single-minded Anakin. He values his mind above all else - as it should be for him, I suppose, but I wouldn't want to be stuck in a well with him. Shari is a strong character, a pity, but inevitable, that she dies after reaching a new understanding with herself. "One Enchanted Evening": erotic, understated and believable. P art of the pleasure is in keeping the "nice person" anonymous. Luke will be looking at everyone twice. "Trust" fascinating. I enjoyed the whole premise. The only emotion of Luke's that seemed to be involved was anger - it was good to see him just enjoying sex and not falling in love to justify it. His Darkside reaction was wonderful and Chewie's worry is entirely valid. Can we hope for a second part to this? "Kidstuff - hysterical. Isn't it wonderful when Lukey drops his inhibitions? "Homecoming" beautiful and full of depth. And what a lover! "It's all in the mind" - a great alien encounter story, ouch! "A weeknight at Jabba 's Palace" - you sly dog! I like seeing Xal undercover, so to speak. So when is he going to wear Han down again? You didn 't really kill him in Dagobah 8? ... "A Corellian in Hell" was downright sadistic! How dare you print just this little bit, where is the whole thing? "The Pitfalls ofProfiction" wicked and right on the mark. "Azar-wand" - what is it about Luke as a sex slave that' s so much fun? Whatever I left out, that was wonderful, too, the whole zine is terrific. I particularly enjoyed sexual situations as side-parts of the stories. Much more natural than some of the other zines that don't refer to sex.

I got the zine yesterday and after the ad and your intro in front of the zine I was prepared to be Shocked, Astounded and encounter truly Unmentionable Perversions, but instead I found it to be a lot of fun. The thing I liked most about it was that all the contributors did a really excellent job of keeping the characters recognizable. "Kidstuff" has got to be my favorite story, especially in that it stays so wonderfully in character. I love Chewie's reaction when he walks in ("What 's that supposed to be when it's finished?") It made me laugh out loud several times. I also really liked "Weeknight in Jabba's Palace". Xal was a good character and I wouldn t mind seeing more stories with him and Han. One thing I can't stand in pro or fan fiction is gay characters who come off as terminally doomed or constant victims and Xal was certainly not that. The fight with Boba Fett certainly showed he was no marshmallow. "Defeat" was probably my least favorite, just because it had a downer ending, though the writing was excellent. I am a happy ending junkie when it comes to SW. "Corellian Courage" was a good example of this and quite a good read. I thought "A Corellian in Hell" was shaping up to be a pretty good story and wish the author would do more ofit. It's kind of hard to have that sort of stuff going on and keep Han in character, but I think she was doing a good job of it.

This zine has been a long time coming (pun intended) but it was worth the wait. What a delightfully wicked masterpiece you' ve produced. Though risque in the extreme, I didn 't find one story in poor taste. Even the so-called "slash" stories were handled as well as possible. The art throughout the zine was also tantalizingly delicious. Anakin on page 27 is positively yummy. The rendition of Han and Leia on page 71 is beautiful and I am still drooling over the art of Luke on page 180. As for the contents, everything was wonderful, but my fav filk was "Cold comfort" by Maggie Nowakowska and my favorite poem was "Unholy Trinity". I really wish there had been a name attached to "Pitfalls of Profiction" because this brilliant little gem had me laughing aloud. "Daisies" by Elizabeth Stuart was clever and fun. "Trust" by Kirk Stormm was incredibly well written with a fascinating plot that I found totally believable. Though I 'm not a big fan of "slash" stories, I thought this one was well worth the read. Good work, whoever you are! But my very favorite story in the zine had to be "Kidstuff by Fritz. From the first few paragraphs to the end, I was left clasping my sides in joyful pain. What a wit! I 'm sure I'll be re-reading this one for years to come. Bravo! I nearly forgot to mention the charming cartoons on page 168. I especially loved the Luke and Yoda one. I hope to see another issue of the Garbage soon. SW fandom needs variety and humor, and you' ve certainly provided

What can I say except...OUCH! This is one of the best zines I've read and hopefully there will be many future issues. "Corellian Courage" -perfect piece to start with, since it set up everyone for an emotional roller-coaster for the rest of the zine. It was a great story that showed that infamous male bonding we women can't always understand. I don't usually go for Han centered stories, but A. Gettim drew me in and it changed my mind. "A learning experience/Storms and visions" - Did you two work on these together?... They were both wicked. The picture you drew of Anakin was incredible. To be trapped with him for a few days would be any woman's dream. Insatiable lust...doesn't sound too bad. "Fertility rites" Wow. Talk about sex crazed. Like I said before, I 'm not a huge Han fan, but this piece was too good to pass by. I hope Space Fox writes some more for future issues. "Trust" - um... I couldn't actually picture Luke as the bisexual type, although I've always said to each his own. I thought this story was great, a learning experience for Luke and the reader. The pictures for this story were breathtaking, especially page 48!!! "Homecoming" - interesting! V ader actually has a human side...Makes you wonder just how good a Jedi must be between the sheets. (I 'm sure we would all love to find out.) Aristocrats are the same everywhere, even other planets. It was almost funny to read how Tamaris was so worried about what rumors would be spread about Vader, when she herself was considered loose. "Defeat" - now this was my favorite story of all. Kept me hooked all the way through. Although the idea of Luke meeting up with the Emperor and the Rebels being defeated had been done, Elizabeth wrote the best one of all. She made you want to jump into the story and rip apart those who raped Luke and destroy the Emperor with your own bare hands. I absolutely loved it and hope she continues to do more like this. I love the last line by Vader: "We are Emperor now..." "Sisters"- (I wonder which one wrote this) Hotttt!!!! Takes you there and back again. "Azar-wand" -1 think this is a fantasy for most ofus. To have Luke as a slave, attending to your every wish. Z.P. you wrote exactly what we all have wished for. It was a great piece and again, the picture was great. To any I missed, not because they were less noteworthy, but because of lac k of time, they were great. A zine worth its weight in gold. Definitely waiting for the next one.

I wish to let you know that I enjoyed the The Rest of the Garbage very much. I believe there is definitely room for a more adult- oriented Star Wars zine as long as it's handled discreetly and kept out of the reach of children. Although I generally have a hard time getting into pre ANH stories regarding Anakin and Palpatine, the stories here were interesting. While there could be a certain amount of attraction to the power Anakin exudes, I found the character presented in "A learning experience" and "Storms and Visions" to be overly arrogant considering it was still relatively early in his training by Palpatine. I can't see what Luke and Leia's mother would have seen in him. ... " Homecoming" on the other hand presented the man beneath the mask as being sensitive to others it they deserved it, appreciative of honesty and loathing hypocrisy. There were signs of a decent man who had been corrupted.

Poor Luke! Talk about being everyone's sex toy! "Trust" was a very good story. Although Luke was repulsed by his actions when he realiyed he had used the dark side to defeat the Skylar, can his feelings for Leia unleash the fury again? I like the possibilities this story left open. I must say though that I would have preferred that the Skylar be a woman.

I'd rather have Han, Luke and Leia remain heterosexual in the stories, and if same sex does occur, that it not be out of choice. "Defeat" was a powerful story. Hopefully Luke will be able to overcome this sick, desperate passion for his father. I can never get enough Han and Leia stories. The day after I read "Union" I found myself thinking about it as I was sitting on a NY subway train. I suddenly realized I had a Mona Lisa smile on my face. After reminding myself that I was on my way to work, I again had to keep myself from smiling as I tried to figure out how I would comment on this story in a Loc. Actually I have nothing more to say other than thanks for making my subway ride a little less tedious! "Discoveries" was good, but I felt bad for Leia having to sit there there while Han went off to show Vesca his 'equipment'. "Daisies"was excellent. That was a very novel idea having Leia's passion be felt not only by Luke but thru Luke to Vader. "One of the best pieces" was a fun story, but the most "hair-raising" story of all was "Special modifications". It was a riot. Though I did not individually mention all the stories, I enjoyed them all. They were all very well done. The art and cartoons were great. My compliments to all the writers and artists for putting together one fine zine.

The Rest of the Garbage was tastefully (for the most part) done and wisely, discreetly distributed. I predict a line down the hotel corridor outside your room when you're ready to give out #2. The stories were varied, some made me shudder, some made me sigh, one made me giggle. (That was the one that was not so tasteful, but very funny!). Even the author pseudonyms (to protect the not-so-innocent) were entertaining. After finishing my copy, I said, "That's good. You've taken your first step into a larger world."