Ampersand (Star Trek: TOS story)
| Fanfiction | |
|---|---|
| Title: | Ampersand |
| Author(s): | Michele Arvizu |
| Date(s): | 1987 |
| Length: | |
| Genre(s): | slash |
| Fandom(s): | Star Trek: TOS |
| Relationship(s): | Kirk/Spock |
| External Links: | |
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Ampersand is a Kirk/Spock story by Michele Arvizu. The art is by Caren Parnes.
It was published in Nome #10.
Summary
"Through the night of a diplomatic reception, Spock comes to understand his friendship with fellow crewmembers and with Kirk. Introspective study of Spock's attempts to communicate with his human associates."
"Spock struggles to understand his relationship uith his human friends and in particular, Jim Kirk. At the end of a long evening spent attending a Star Fleet retirement party, McCoy and Spock share a drink and a conversation that helps Spock decide on a course of action for his life."
Reactions and Reviews
1987
AMPERSAND, one of the shorter pieces - 35 pages - gives Spock a chance to examine his relationship with the "secondary" characters who too often are excluded from K/S geared zines. The illos for this one are fail, but the one depicting an ancient Vulcan piece that Spock and Uhura discuss is a disappointment and would have been better simply left out as the image was well drawn by the author's words.[1]
1988
I can't decide why I like "Ampersand" so much better than 'An Easier Time." Perhaps it was Spock minus his memory I didn't care for in the latter, for the story was, objectively speaking, just fine. (Possibly I was just too chilled by the sex on a cold chair!) As for "Ampersand," I loved it and I want a sequel. I especially liked Kirk's use of a "Spock-substitute" obviously, Michele Arvizu has a sense of humor. Maybe that's what I missed in her other story.[2]
I can't ever recall reading a fanzine story that was such a refreshing, pleasant, light-hearted read and at the same timeverydeepand profound. Wonderful dialogue in all the scenes. An excellent piece of work and a delight to read. Probably the most original Star Trek story I've ever read.[3]
[a fan compares "Ampersand" in relation to the other stories in "Nome"regarding a theme]: [The first story, One More Door]: My favorites are long term lovers, yes, but their relationship is not complete until they produce a child (by McCoy's genetic manipulation) and this baby is delivered in the most "natural" way possible. The story seems to imply that the relationship cannot be considered as complete in itself but must be ratified in (what is in this century) a heterosexual manner. Michele Arvizu's "An Easier Time" seems to produce the same answer to the problem. The post-Voyage Home pair have no relationship and, it seems, cannot have one until Spock has had sex and converse with Saavik. Only through her can he learn to accept and later voice his love for Kirk. "He thought of his time with Saavik. She had given all this to him. She had put things in perspective, made him feel unique, special, loved. Given him the courage to speak of love to Jim and the chance to reinvent himself." So again, homosexual love has been somehow verified by heterosexuality.Michele's other story, Ampersand, echoes the theme. Although not primarily K/S, it is made clear that Spock cannot begin to understand Jim without detailed reference to McCoy and particularly Uhura (with whom at one stage he wishes to spend the night). "Sea Change" approaches the dilemma more easily, but even here the intervention of a female is needed, albeit of Gracie, the whale! Barbara is, however, more comfortable with her characters; Kirk and Spock were lovers before Genesis. Flora Poste's "Mirror Allegiance" is A/U and therefore not subject to quite the same criteria, but Kirk and Spock still agonize desperately over the simple fact of sex, this in a universe of extreme sophistication. Still, we don't have the he's-heterosexual-he-can't-possibly tangle.
The story that is the keystone of the argument is [specifically Elwyn Conway's continuing saga. Her heroes are heterosexual and she states this firmly and often. For example. Kirk says of himself and Sulu, "He'd never been sexually attracted to any man and wasn't about to make an exception now." Elwyn seems to need to explain and vindicate Kirk and Spock's love time after time. It is spiritual, overpowering, different from that of any other couple, "A love that transcends sex" and finally is blessed and sanctioned by a guru figure, the Etifa. Having gone carefully through the zine, it seems to me that NOME 10 is quintessential of the 80's. There is no matter of fact approach. (A British writer once defined the ultimate K/S story as, "the red alert goes, Kirk and Spock jump out of bed and get on with the adventure.") There are no established stories (and very few at all in K/S). Is this the result of the Puritan backlash of AIDS? Is this why there are still so many first time stories? [4]
[This story] turned me off entirely. I just can't see Kirk behaving in that way. But the story was salvaged by the meeting with Uhura Spock had in that side room. Uhura, although not one of my favorite characters, seems to have more maturity and wisdom than the others in this tale, and (I find) Michele's characterization of her the most true to life.[5]
1990
This is one of my favorite stories and I don't really know why. I don't think the Kirk portrayed here is exactly correct, but the 'feeling' created is rue. I especially like the interaction between Spock and Uhura. [6]
Reactions and Reviews: Some 1988 Meta on the State of K/S Fiction
In 1988, this story was discussed in several larger reviews. One fan, Jane Carnall wrote two letters of comment to two different zines about this story in the context of Nome. In it she , compared "Ampersand" and the other stories in Nome #10 as examples of the way 1980s fanfiction represented K/S:
This is one of the most interesting issues of the series. It contains six good length stories plus poetry and art. All the writing is of the high standard we have come to expect from Nome, so this review is on the basis of a) personal preference and b) an idea I have about current trends in K/S.I enjoyed Nome 10 because whether or not I agreed with the themes and characterisation, each story provided something to think about rather than the usual first time 'wallow'.
For example "Sea Change" by Barbara Storey, my favourite in the zine, is a post ST IV story which sets Gillian's adjustments to the 23rd century against Kirk and Spock's relationship. Spock has forgotten his previous life as Kirk's lover. He must make changes before he can return to Kirk. I liked this for the lovely warm pictures of Spock from Gillian's POV.
Michele Arvizu contributes two pieces. The first is not strictly K/S but shows the Series Spock trying to understand 'the grand fallacy' of his existence on the Enterprise and his place among the crew. I felt uncomfortable with this one. To make it work. Kirk must be bumptious and insensitive with Spock, which in the series he isn't - bad-tempered, yes, but quick to apologise. Here he orders Spock to strip (in his quarters at least) so that he can see what he's got! Then he instigates nude wrestling with his discomfited F.O. and afterwards cheerily tells him that he's had his first homosexual experience! Later Kirk openly flirts with a woman while silently mouthing "I love you" over her shoulder at Spock. As Leslie Fish has said, "Not my Jim" - thought-provoking though.
Michele's second is post ST IV. Spock vows things will be easier with Jim this time (they were not lovers in the past), but only after he has sorted out the pon farr business and had sex with Saavik! Again out of character for me but interesting.
"Mirror Allegiance" by Flora Poste finally reaches a sort of conclusion to the saga (although a postscript is promised). Written in her customary meticulous style, this segment seemed rather wordy to me. All the action is retrospective, which is hard to handle with variety. I could feel the author shifting her characters from sofa to fireplace to window to break the monotony. I do like her careful exploration of relationships but I think she has overdone it this time.
Elwyn Conway also reaches a stopping point but as usual, I wish she would give us more of her excellent plotting and minor characters and less saccharine. This time under the influence of the Etife's love and peace hippy style planet nearly everyone pours out feelings for everyone else (as usual, too, no one does anything).
The least satisfactory story for both style and content is "One More Door" by Ellen Morris in which Kirk and Spock produce a daughter by genetic and McCoy's manipulation and Kirk contracts a nasty bug which will probably carry him off - pure soap! It may be unkind to say so but I suspect the author has no experience of impending bereavement or if she has, she can't write it.
The poetry, real poetry not prose-in-chunks-on-a-page, is of very high quality, especially the work by Flora Poste.
As a whole Nome interested me because I think I detect an intriguing reflection of K/S in general in its present form and I think, too, I may have found at least part of an answer to that perennial question, why not more established stories and why so many first-timers. To explain I'll have to take you back to the 70's when K/S was just getting into print.
With Thrust, Companion, and others, writers and readers found they had a phaser on overload in their laps. The idea of K/S was not well received by fandom in general, so that those first zines and their immediate successors were faced with the task of explaining K/S not just to the outside world but to K/Sers themselves. It was special, they said; it was not gay, they said; two heterosexuals who love each other; it was pon farr; it was unique; etc, etc.
Yet as the years passed, instead of readers and writers getting accustomed to the idea - yes, OK, they're lovers, so what happened next? In 1988 they are still flailing with desperate explanations, and Nome 10 is a case in point. Six stories, five writers, and all trying to justify, rationalise, explain in heterosexual terms the K/S premise. Kirk and Spock produce a daughter (born naturally in a tank, 'delivered' by McCoy). Only after sex with Saavik can Spock express his love for Jim. Elwyn Conway states time and again that Kirk isn't homosexual, that the relationship is unique, spiritual, transcendent and blessed by the Etife, her and their guru (very 60's). The ambivalence runs deep.
Even Flora Poste has them agonising at length. Only Barbara Storey seems comfortable, describing them as lovers before her narrative starts. Still Spock has to talk to a female (albeit a well-spoken whale) before he can return to Jim.
In general the relationship is not accepted, not taken for granted and always worried over. Is this part of the 80's backlash? Is this why there are still the endless first timers, because even K/S fans cannot accept what they created? Is it also the reason for the lack of established relationship zines? I can only resort to rhetorical questions.[7]
Kirk and Spock are long term lovers, yes, but their relationship is not complete until they produce a child (by McCoy's genetic manipulation) and this baby is delivered in the most "natural" way possible. The story seems to imply that the relationship cannot be considered as complete in itself but must be ratified in (what is in this century) a heterosexual manner.
Michele Arvizu's "An Easier Time" seems to produce the same answer to the problem. The post-Voyage Home pair have no relationship and, it seems, cannot have one until Spock has had sex and converse with Saavik. Only through her can he learn to accept and later voice his love for Kirk. "He thought of his time with Saavik. She had given all this to him. She had put things in perspective, made him feel unique, special, loved. Given him the courage to speak of love to Jim and the chance to reinvent himself." So again, homosexual love has been somehow verified by heterosexuality.
Michele's other story, Ampersand, echoes the theme. Although not primarily K/S, it is made clear that Spock cannot begin to understand Jim without detailed reference to McCoy and particularly Uhura (with whom at one stage he wishes to spend the night).
"Sea Change" approaches the dilemma more easily, but even here the intervention of a female is needed, albeit of Gracie, the whale! Barbara is, however, more comfortable with her characters; Kirk and Spock were lovers before Genesis.
Flora Poste's "Mirror Allegiance" is A/U and therefore not subject to quite the same criteria, but Kirk and Spock still agonize desperately over the simple fact of sex, this in a universe of extreme sophistication. Still, we don't have the he's-heterosexual-he-can't-possibly tangle.
The story that is the keystone of the argument is Elwyn Conway's continuing saga. Her heroes are heterosexual and she states this firmly and often. For example. Kirk says of himself and Sulu, "He'd never been sexually attracted to any man and wasn't about to make an exception now." Elwyn seems to need to explain and vindicate Kirk and Spock's love time after time. It is spiritual, overpowering, different from that of any other couple, "A love that transcends sex" and finally is blessed and sanctioned by a guru figure, the Etifa.
Having gone carefully through the zine, it seems to me that NOME 10 is quintessential of the 80's. There is no matter of fact approach. (A British writer once defined the ultimate K/S story as, "the red alert goes, Kirk and Spock jump out of bed and get on with the adventure.") There are no established stories (and very few at all in K/S).
Is this the result of the Puritan backlash of AIDS? Is this why there are still so many first time stories? I wait hopefully for your reaction. (By the way, when the infamous Clause 27 of the Local Government Act is passed in Great Britain, which forbids the 'promotion' of homosexuality as a valid lifestyle, the writing of K/S will become technically illegal.)
Finally, I must say that I thought NOME 10 one of the best of the series; well-written, a good variety of stories, and thought provoking.[8]