Plans, Scams and Vans

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Zine
Title: Plans, Scams and Vans
Publisher: Sockii Press
Editor(s): Sockii
Date(s): 1995-1999
Series?:
Medium: print, also via shareware
Size:
Genre:
Fandom: The A-Team
Language: English
External Links:
Click here for related articles on Fanlore.

Plans, Scams and Vans is a gen A-Team anthology.

About

From an Ebay Seller in 2010: "Having seen many fanzines covering a wide range of subjects, this is one of the best presented and has a vast quantity of A-Team related content. It demonstrates creative ability by the staff which goes beyond regurgitation of show related facts."

Set Free

Some issues were available as shareware. The message at that time:

Please note that the main reason I am offering electronic format for the 'zines this time is due to many requests, and also complaints about how much printed 'zines cost (which is not due to any profit-taking on my part - small-scale publishing just ain't cheap!) However, consider these files as SHAREWARE and not FREEWARE to the extent that it *still* cost me bucks to produce these files, even though you can access them for free. I still had to send out hardcopies to proofreaders, free printed copies to all contributors, pay for the software I bought EXPRESSLY for the 'zine project, etc etc etc. I can't expect the print copies to absorb all of these costs and keep them at all reasonable. So, I am asking that if you download the files, and enjoy the 'zine, a $1-2 donation this way would be appreciated. Or at least a letter or postcard of appreciation and acknowledgement that you downloaded them. [1]

Issue 1

Plans, Scams and Vans 1 was published in June 1995 and contains 79 pages.

cover of issue #1
sample page from issue #1
  • Close Enough for Jazz, editorial (2)
  • Bad Day for a Space-Time Anomaly by sockii ("U.S.S. Enterprise, here comes The A-Team! When the team crash (literally) into the 24th century, Captain Picard is sure to have a very bad day. And what's that Vorlon doing hanging around in Ten-Forward anyway? Don't ask Murdock, he's having too much fun with Barclay on the holodecks.") (crossover with Star Trek: TNG) (4)
  • Invasion of Air-Space by Laura Michaels ("Lieutenant Templeton Peck was handcuffed to a wooden support beam in a barn with an activated bomb. How do I always get myself into these messes? he thought out loud. He was trying to figure a way out of his troubles when he heard someone outside. "Help!" he yelled.") (34)
  • 101 Ways to Break Out of the V.A. Hospital by H.M. Murdock ("It had to happen sometime. In case you ever find yourself in such a confining predicament, just employ one of Murdock's tried-and-true solutions.") (42)
  • Adventures on Prime Time Book Review by Michele Lellouche (A review of a book on Stephen J. Cannell and an A-Team bibliography, both by Michele Lellouche.) (48)
  • A Selected Bibliography for The A-Team, article by Michele Lellouche (50)
  • Rockin' Down the House by Laura Michaels ("That's what the team will be doing when they brandish electric guitars instead of machine guns to save a youth center. Eighties rock nostalgia with a vengeance.") (55)
  • Special Assignment by sockii ("What's a good 'zine without a little romance? When Amy departs for her new position as foreign correspondent, she leaves behind more than her sense of adventure.") (64)


Issue 2

front cover of issue #2
back cover of issue #2

Plans, Scams and Vans 2 was published in March 1996 and contains 126 pages.

  • The Return of the Son of the Jazz, editorial (2)
  • A Letter to the Editor by Kyle Cassidy (4)
  • The A-Team by Ernest Hemingway by Kyle Cassidy (5)
  • Out of the Frying Pan... by Irene Snyder Schwarting ("What do chicken bones, a Hanoi school bus, the MASH 4077th, and 5 colonels have in common? They're all part of the story of how the A-Team escaped from a prison camp only to face a court martial. Find out just what Hannibal meant when he said, "Colonel, you are not qualified to assume command. Now, either you can shut up and follow orders, or Face here can shoot you and we'll have one less problem to deal with. Take your pick.") (crossover with MASH) (7)
  • A Team to Steele by Liz Meinert (crossover with Remington Steele) (20)
  • Missing? by Laura Michaels ("It's a "missing person" case of a different kind when Face decides to give private investigating a try on his own. Can he find the "Boy" in question and still keep his social calendar intact?") (21)
  • Conspiracy by Liz Meinert (crossover with Nowhere Man) (27)
  • Ode to the A-Team, poem by "Swatman" Steven Daniel (28)
  • Hacking Away at the System by sockii ("Students at the prestigious Massachusetts Institute of Technology have been disappearing without a trace. Can the A-Team solve the mystery before it's too late? Only the mysterious Jack E. Florey may know for sure.") (29)
  • The Lady by Liz Meinert ("The FIRM wants to hire the A-Team to bring back AIRWOLF. But then Hawke wants to hire the Team to steal it back for him. Confused? You won't be once you've read this story.") (crossover with Airwolf) (65)
  • Distant Thunder by sockii (crossover with The X-Files) (76)
  • A Closet Full of Skeletons, A Past Full of Ghosts ("Frankie's been kidnapped by an old enemy of Hannibal's out for revenge. But what's the rest of the Team to do when Hannibal doesn't want their help?" script format) (77)
  • Shadows and Stars by sockii ("Think of it as The A-Team: The Next Generation. A Colonial Warrior named Starbuck is rescued from a deserted world only to be stranded on space station Babylon 5. Can he find his way back to the Galactica before it's too late? Perhaps, once he enlists the help of a lurker named Amis, a mechanic with an attitude problem, and a mercenary with a penchant for cigars.") (crossover with Battlestar Galactica (1978)/Babylon 5) (92)
  • The A-Team of Space transcribed by Laura Michaels ("From the logs of the Starship BA's Van on its run through the cosmos, when four legendary space heroes are brought together for reasons unknown, madness is sure to ensue quickly.") (crossover with Battlestar Galactica (1978)/Buck Rogers/Star Wars) (118)
  • The PS&V Team (126)

Issue 3

Plans, Scams and Vans 3 was published in January 1997 and contains 117 pages.

cover of issue #3
  • The Son of the Jazz Strikes Back, editorial (2)
  • If You Have a Problem (letters of comment) (3)
  • Mercenary Reunion by Laura Michaels ("Murdock pays a visit to an old friend, who should by all accounts be dead.") (crossover with Highlander) (5)
  • All For One by Irene Snyder Schwarting ("'Decker thinks Amy's working for us,' Hannibal started. Murdock interrupted, 'Which she is.' 'Yes, but we don't want him to know that. So we're gonna make him think that we think she's working for him. Feel up to doing some more acting, Allen?' Amy stared at him, confused. 'You're gonna be our ticket into that base. We're gonna offer Decker you for Face.'") (14)
  • From the Diary of H.M. Murdock (28)
  • The Episode Guide From Hell by Frank Cortez, Rhonda Eudaly, Liz Meinert, Sockii and Irene Snyder Schwarting ("The episodes that never were, but perhaps should have been...?") (29)
  • Of Martyrs and Cheeseburgers by Rhona Eudaly ("'How could I possibly be any help to you, Miss Parker?' Murdock asked, gesturing around him. 'Take a look around you, I'm not exactly free to do as I please.'") (35)
  • The A-Team Fan Fiction Index by sockii ("An expanded and newly revised version of the Fan-Fic list that was published on the internet. Lists all 'zines, newsletters, individual stories tracked down to date involving the A-Team.") (The outdated index is here.) (48)
  • Alternative Theme Songs (66)
  • Intertwining Fates by Natasha McKee ("Teleportation wasn't supposed to land Kamala in the middle of late 20th century Earth. But, since she was there, she thought might as well lend a hand to the four men trying to keep a young crime-scene witness out of trouble.") (70)
  • Doin' it with Style by Irene Snyder Schwarting ("Ever wonder just how Faceman DID get that Cadillac Convertible in the jungles of 'Nam?.") (85)
  • Welcome to the Hotel California by Jasmine ("Hannibal pulled the piece of paper from his shirt and said, 'I think I've found a way into this place. It appears that they are selling people to anyone who is rich enough and can afford them. From the papers in the safe, and the list I have here, they bring very wealthy clients in one at a time and conduct a silent auction. Face won't be in any danger unless someone bids on him.' Hannibal smiled and looked at Amy. 'Amy? How would you like to be the Princess of Sri Banah?'") (87)
  • It's the Thought That Counts by sockii ("Thanksgiving will never be the same. Find out whatever possessed Amy to yell, 'Murdock, if you touch this bird one more time I'm going to stick YOU in the oven instead!'") (100)
  • An A-Team Christmas by Rhonda Eudaly (Originally published on-line in the A-Team electronic newsletter: "B.A. as Santa Claus? Murdock as an elf? When someone steals the Christmas toys, no one is gonna be laughing anymore!") (104)
  • Drive by Gill Dunn ("The other had been one of the pilots - the one wearing a regulation army green T-shirt and a camouflage jacket and a very non-regulation blue baseball cap. He'd had a drink half-raised and now looked around in confusion at the empty chairs around him. Face had sheepishly raised his head just in time to see the pilot notice the colonel, who was in turn looking back at him through the smoky haze. The pilot had grinned broadly. 'Cheers, Colonel!' he'd shouted before gulping down the rest of his drink.") (108)
  • About the Authors (117)

Reactions and Reviews: Issue 3

  • Overall:9
  • Fiction:9
  • Artwork:9
  • Layout/editing:9

Favorites: (1) "All For One" because Irene is just the best! She captures things so well!

Least Fave: (1) "Intertwining Fates" because got lost. Felt like the characters were just shells of themselves.

Other comments: (1) Loved the cover! Stories were all excellent. First 'zine I received, and kept me coming back for more! [2]

Issue 4

front cover of issue #4

Plans, Scams and Vans 4 was published in 1997 and and contains 150 pages.

  • Another 'Zine Comes Together, editorial (2)
  • Sockii Press Mailbag (3)
  • Fugitives and Investigators and Spaceships, Oh My! by Chris Hammell ("Things are getting weird in San Francisco - can the problem be a nasty bunch of time-traveling Klingons? And why are they terrorizing a shop keeper? Laughs and plenty of action, even a grand finale featuring Boba Fett and Jabba the Hutt!") (crossover with Star Trek: TNG, The X-files, and Star Wars) (5)
  • Something's Odd in Eastbridge by Rhonda Eudaly. ("Sam's gotta think fast when he jumps into the Team's latest client, and then has to keep the Team away from his friend Tony Scali. And none of the guys can figure out why Murdock is suddenly looking at their client very strangely.") (crossover with Quantum Leap) (44)
  • A Conman's Holiday by Irene Snyder Schwarting ("Face is taking it easy coaching a Little League Team. What could go wrong? Getting too friendly with one mother named Barabara LYNCH, perhaps.") (59)
  • Relaxing Conversation by Jasmine ("An afternoon off gives the Team some time to reflect on what other paths their lives might have taken.") (64)
  • Colds Are Contagious by Laura Michaels ("It looks like something might be up with Face's latest lady friend, Marlene. Can Murdock's Magnificent Mind Control Methods help sort things out?") (66)
  • Crossed Steele by Katherine Ressman ("Colonel Decker has hired the Remington Steele agency to help track down the Team. But can Remington really turn in an old conman friend?") (crossover with Remington Steele) (77)
  • Th A-Team Merchanise List by Christopher Bunting (83)
  • Fan-Fiction List Update by N.N. Pellegrini (Updated from the one in issue #3. An even more outdated index is here.) (92)
  • Born in a Crossfire Hurricane by Lisa Deidrich ("One possible scenario for what really happened during the Hanoi Bank Mission.") (94)
  • An Ice Day at the Rink by Alana Nichols ("The Team comes to the rescue when an ice skating rink is in jeopardy. Could Murdock be the next Gary Beacom?") (103)
  • Things That Make You Say H.M. by Rhonda Eudaly ("There's nothing like a life-threatening situation to make one ponder the meaningful questions in life. Like, what exactly does that "H.M." stand for, anyway? Face is determined to find out.") (112)
  • Out Where the Shadows Run by N.N. Pellegrini ("That's right, finally, the sequel to "Shadows and Stars" from issue #2. Psi Corp is on our Team's trail this time, and one of them may need to make a pact with some "shadowy" types to help them evade capture by Bester. But even if they avoid the Corps, they could find even more trouble awaiting them at their next destination, a mining outpost where all of the workers have mysteriously been killed.") (crossover with Babylon 5/Battlestar Galactica (1978)) (116)

Issue 5

Plans, Scams and Vans 5 was published May 1998 and contains 115 pages.

It was the first edition to contain some stories which had previously been available on the internet.

cover of issue #5
  • Sockii Press Mailbag (2)
  • Trains, Planes and Boats by D. Ferrara (A trilogy of connected stories.) (2)
  • Double Dealing by Amanda Bogardus ("A nurse with attitude at the V.A. leads to trouble for the Faceman.") (3 pages)
  • One Swam into the Cuckoo’s Nest by Jessica Hargis ("'Things went a little sour?' Amy cupped one hand around the phone's receiver and struggled to keep her voice down as the other reporters at the Courier glanced her way. 'Hannibal, Face and Murdock are being held by a maniac who's ready to hold an auction and invite the A-Team hate club! I mean, that wasn't exactly in the game plan!'") (28)
  • This Little Team Went to Market by Mary Sauers ("Not even the local supermarket is safe when the Team goes shopping!") (31)
  • Jenny Beth by Kristin Munson ("A young woman is in trouble, but when she crosses paths with the A-Team it's the bad guys that'll be on the run.") (46)
  • A Tendency to Start Fires by Amanda Bogardus ("The Team is testing Stockwell's limits while trying to pick up B.A.'s spirits.') (59)
  • What’s in a Name? by Irene Snyder Schwarting ("Stockwell traces back through Face's early years, in the search to determine if A.J. Bancroft really is Face's father.") (originally published on the On the Jazz mailing list) (68)
  • Amy’s Book by Robin L. Ryder ("A sequel to "Special Assignment" in which Face has a crisis, B.A.'s bad attitude acts up, Frankie hasn't got a clue and Hannibal smokes a cigar.") (78)
  • Who Killed Cock Robin? by Maxi ("An immortal decides to set the record straight about what really happened to Colonel Morrison.") (original version was posted to the author's website) (91)
  • The Editor's Famous Last Words & Credits (113)
  • The Best Laid Plans... by Liz Meinert & sockii ("Two A-Team fans and a dimension hopper spell big trouble for our guys!") (10 pages)


Issue 6

Plans, Scams and Vans 6 was published February 1999 and has 113 pages.

cover of issue #6

References

  1. ^ from PLANS SCAMS AND VANS 3
  2. ^ Sockii Press Questionnaire, Archived version
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