Rant Along with CathyB: John Doggett
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| Title: | Rant Along With CathyB: John Doggett |
| Creator: | CathyB |
| Date(s): | November 2000 |
| Medium: | |
| Fandom: | The X-Files |
| Topic: | |
| External Links: | Rant Along With CathyB: John Doggett |
| Click here for related articles on Fanlore. | |
Rant Along With CathyB: John Doggett is a 2000 essay by CathyB.
The essay was part of a series of columns the author did for the X-files newsletter, News for the OBSSEsed, this one for issue #36.
NOTE: none of CathyB's columns had titles; the titles used here on Fanlore were created from a prominent, descriptive phrase in the essay.
A related essay is Manly, Yes...but I like it too.
Essays in the Same Series
- Rant along with CathyB: Closure
- Rant Along with CathyB: Era of the Celebrity Guest Star
- Rant Along with CathyB: John Doggett
- Rant Along with CathyB: much of my vexation could be spelled F-O-X
- Rant Along with CathyB: Season 8: Maybe No One Will Notice
Excerpts
I don't know if any of you have heard, but there's going to be a new guy on The X-Files this season. His name is Doggett.
And he's a manly man. Oh yeah, a real blue-collar dude. A guy's guy. He wears Wranglers and Old Spice and lives in his pickup truck. He eats his Wheaties with Bud instead of milk. He don't cotton to no aliens, and he certainly don't cry over no missing sister. If he wanted to knock Scully up he wouldn't wait seven years to do it, he'd sling her over his shoulder, bring her back to said pickup truck, put on some Johnny Cash and get it on. Doesn't matter if her ova were removed by no Consortium or what have you <spit of tobackey>, she'd still be barefoot and pregnant in no time flat.
I don't want you to misunderstand me. This is not a rant about Doggett. From what I've read and heard I think the character has the potential to be a good one. OK, it's a cliché (an inevitable one, sigh) that in Mulder's absence the torch of believingness would be passed to Scully and the kneejerk-skeptic role would go to the new guy. (It's IRONY, you know.) They tried, awkwardly and annoyingly I might add, to do this with Spender. I'm still not thrilled about the idea with Doggett. (And then there's the name "Doggett." Groan.) But I am looking forward to seeing what happens when he's thrown into the mix. I dig Prickly, Defensive!Scully, I've always been a sucker for those "third-party POV" fics, and I do agree with the whole "shot in the arm" theory, which holds that shaking up the show will, at least in the short term, make it more interesting. Yeah, the addition of Doggett is OK with me. Bring it on.
Nor is it a rant about Robert Patrick. I've had occasion to read quite a few articles on Mr. Patrick over the last couple months or so, and he has made, overall, a very positive impression on me. It seems that he's aware he's walking into a hugely charged situation, certainly as far as the fans go, and that he's being very respectful of that -- but he also doesn't strike me as being a pushover; that is, he's not going "You're right, Mulder's a lot better, I suck. Hopefully I'll be killed soon. In the meantime, would you like an autographed picture? I'll pay you five bucks." I think it was an account of someone's set visit I was reading where he was asked if he felt guilty for having joined the show (or something), and he replied (HUGELY paraphrased, as this is not only from my unreliable memory but also, presumably, from the memory of whoever wrote the set report), "Why should I? I haven't done anything wrong. They hired me to work here and I said yes." Good for him. Mr. Patrick, you seem like a good egg and I look forward to "meeting" you on Nov. 5.
I have a contrary streak in me, one that means the more I'm asked to do something the less I feel like doing it, and the more something is talked up to me the less inclined I am to try it. This is the same contrary streak that caused me to wait so long before watching The X-Files in the first place -- my friend told me so many times that I'd like it that I started to think I wouldn't. Still in the TV vein, it's also why I haven't gotten around to watching The Sopranos. I just haven't been able to bring myself to want to. (And don't say "But it really *is* a great -- " cause you'll just be setting your cause back. :P )
So being told OVER and OVER again, from all directions (the official site, magazine articles, website rehashes of magazine articles, interviews with everyone who works or has ever worked within three miles of the set) how FREAKING MAGNIFICENT Doggett is is making me more and more annoyed with him. "WHY DON'T YOU JUST MARRY HIM?" I frequently feel like yelling at Frank Spotnitz (for example).
I know that in some fan quarters the hysteria over the absence of Mulder is at an absolute fever pitch, and I assume there is a certain feeling of urgency up at Fox to say something to encourage them that all is not lost (lest they take their 18-to-49-nesses and their ad dollars and go busy themselves obsessing over someone else's TV show). I myself am very fond of the big lug, and am not happy he's gone (or partially gone), though I do understand that it's David Duchovny's choice and there's not a whole lot I can do about it at the moment.
But the ululating frenzies of Doggett-glorifying ecstasy that we're constantly being subjected to are starting to stir up those kneejerk feelings of contrariness. Not to be crude, but one of these days I practically expect to open up my morning paper (if I EVER did such a thing, which I don't -- OK, log on to my morning Yahoo! News then) and read a quote from Chris Carter saying, "Just WAIT til you see Doggett's testicles. They are GIGANTIC. What a sight to behold. Man alive."
At the moment I'm happy enough to have Doggett joining our little circle of obsession and madness. I think this year is going to be cool. But I'm still hoping the show ends next year, or that by some miracle Gillian Anderson is let off of her contract, because, bottom line, I want Mulder and Scully together. Mulder and Scully are The X-Files for me. Not Mulder. Not Scully. Mulder and Scully. Having Mulder gone for a story arc that will be resolved by the end of the season is one thing. Having him gone for good is something quite drastically different. I don't care if Scully and Doggett burn Los Angeles to the ground with their heat and chemistry, I don't care if Doggett is the bitchin'est mofo to grace our TV screens since Don Johnson, I don't care if Robert Patrick singlehandedly saved 101 adorable puppies from being made into fur coats and then donated his reward to rescue blind dolphins. I don't want Scully ENDING UP with Doggett, personally or professionally. And I don't care if Gillian Anderson hates David Duchovny with the fire of a thousand suns, and vice versa, and if they have to be on special harnesses, operated by production assistants, to keep them from charging each other while filming. They act terrifically together, damn it, and if they're not going to anymore then, I'm sorry, but I'm done.
So, yeah, 1013. Support your new guy, I'm all for that. Certainly I wouldn't want to see them going, "Yeah, he's OK, but, geez, he's no Duchovny. I think we'll all be glad when this jerk is out of here and our pal the Dukester is back." But some restraint would be appreciated. For instance, I have no immediate plans to wave my Special Agent John Doggett Fan Club flag. Will I wave one eventually? I absolutely might. But I'd like to actually meet the man first. And then I'll decide whether I like him or not. How's that sound?