4 Characters in Search of a Plot -- Slash Version
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| Title: | 4 Characters in Search of a Plot -- Slash Version |
| Creator: | Snarkybitch |
| Date(s): | 2001? |
| Medium: | online |
| Fandom: | multi |
| Topic: | writing fanfiction, Stargate SG-1 |
| External Links: | online here, Archived version |
| Click here for related articles on Fanlore. | |
4 Characters in Search of a Plot—Slash Version is an essay by Snarkybitch at Slash Sluts.
"This is a parody/commentary on bad fanfiction. It isn't meant to be taken seriously. It was written to merely point out some of the cliche's in many a bad fanfic and the writers view of that."
Part of a Series
- Why are the slashier tv shows so rarely slashed? by Clio
- Feminizing Men: A Male POV by LuckyD
- Feminizing Vs Effeminate by Clio
- Suddenly Gay?!? by Clio
- We Have Seen the Enemy and She is Us by Lefey
- The Muse's Bitch by Clio
- Oww..oww..Stop that! It Hurts!! by Clio
- How to Write Bad Fanfic in 10 Easy Steps by Snarkybitch
- 4 Characters in Search of a Plot -- Slash Version by Snarkybitch
Excerpts
“How do we get together anyway?” Jack asked. “Is it a ‘Suddenly Gay’ PWP where we simultaneously realize that after a lifetime of heterosexuality that we’re really gay and then jump into bed. Then proceed to have mindblowing sex the first time, without any soulsearching, discussion, research, preparation, (or even lube half the time) and then enter a monogamous relationship. Never have any real world problems to deal with (i.e. Court Martials, Gay Bashing, coming out to family members, fraternizing regulations)and live happily ever after.” Jack said, his trademark sarcasm at 100%.
“Daniel becomes the lovetoy of a horny Gou’ald”. Janet suggested.
“Why is it always me!” Daniel complained. “What am I? Some kind of interstellar rent boy? I’m either a complete virgin, or else I’m roaming the galaxy, getting boned by every randy ET we meet, including an Unas. How come Teal’c never gets some alien booty?”
“Group sex” Sam asked, eager to get in on the action.
“I don’t think so” the writer said, cruelly stomping on Sam’s hopes once again. “How could you guys possibly work together after that? Besides, am I supposed to believe that virtually the entire population of Cheyenne Mountain is gay? That strains credibility a bit, don’tcha think? Also, I’m sure Hammond would find out.”
“Male pregnancy” Sam suggested, grinning evilly.
“Oh no, not again” groused Daniel. The thought of swollen ankles and morning sickness didn’t exactly appeal to him.
“I’ll be the father” Major Davis offered, earning a fierce glare from Jack.
“No pregnancy - it kills the romance” the writer said, much to Daniel’s relief.