Feminizing Men: A Male POV
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| Title: | Feminizing Men: A Male POV |
| Creator: | LuckyD |
| Date(s): | 2001 |
| Medium: | online |
| Fandom: | multi |
| Topic: | |
| External Links: | Feminizing Men: A Male POV by LuckyD, Archived version |
| Click here for related articles on Fanlore. | |
Feminizing Men: A Male POV is an email by LuckyD at Slash Sluts.
It was posted there as feedback from a man who'd been looking at the Slash Sluts website.
Part of a Series
- Why are the slashier tv shows so rarely slashed? by Clio
- Feminizing Men: A Male POV by LuckyD
- Feminizing Vs Effeminate by Clio
- Suddenly Gay?!? by Clio
- We Have Seen the Enemy and She is Us by Lefey
- The Muse's Bitch by Clio
- Oww..oww..Stop that! It Hurts!! by Clio
- How to Write Bad Fanfic in 10 Easy Steps by Snarkybitch
- 4 Characters in Search of a Plot -- Slash Version by Snarkybitch
Introduction by Clio
The email is prefaced by:
This message was sent to me after a Guy was surfing through my pages and found my Bitch Fest. He sent this to me to bring up another aspect of the ways that we can tend to feminize men in our writing. In this he is talking about personal space and the boundaries many men have. Physical boundaries can often be reflections of emotional ones, as well. What he said really made me thing about something I have always been aware of. I think it holds true for gay and straight men. I thought it would be interesting for others to read too. I have posted the message here as it was sent to me, with his permission. Hopefully, it can help you in your writing, as I hope it will help me. He brings up some very valid points that need to be thought of. My whole bitch fest is about trying to make slash better and more realistic. I want to read about men doing men. I want them to be acting like men too. If you keep what he says in mind, I think it will help a great deal with that.
Excerpts
Hello, I just stumbled across your slash website and read your complaints. What caught my attention was the complaints about guys being feminized. Being a guy, I just thought that maybe I’d share some info that you may or may not know. Regarding how guys deal with each other, guys have pretty rigid unspoken rules about how they touch each other. The more macho the guy the more pronounced this is. For example, and this is a generalization of course, a guy might touch you on the shoulder or bicep, but never the lower back or hands, watch the guys around you and you’ll get a feel for where the “safe zones” are. Usually it’s quick with a little force, like a punch or squeeze but never long enough, unless you know the guy well, to be mistaken for anything else. Exceptions are of course locker room behavior which can have fairly homoerotic overtones that no one ever comments on, and drunkenness.
If you are trying to set up a plausible situation where two guys who are not out gay men are stumbling towards the sack together, their initial physical contact is probably not going to venture very far out of their “safe zones”. If some guy picked up my hand that would be far more suggestive than a bear hug. Because one is open to interpretation the other is not.
The feelings are scarier than the sex.