Your K/S Horoscope

Meta
Title:	Your K/S Horoscope
Creator:	anonymous
Date(s):	March 1985
Medium:
Fandom:	Star Trek: TOS
Topic:
External Links:
Click here for related articles on Fanlore.

Your K/S Horoscope was printed in the zine Daring Attempt #2 in spring 1985.

It is meta in the form of a satirical horoscope.

Some Topics Discussed

• fannish tropes
• types of fans

Excerpts

Taurus (April 20 - May 20): You are a practical and persistent person. you have a dogged determination and work like hell. You identify with John Gill of "Patterns of Force" and fail to understand the non-interference directive. You have a thing for Vulcans and are nothing but a goddam communist.

Gemini (May 21 - June 21): You are quick and intelligent. People like you because you are bisexual. You like Star Trek for the actors only. Your favorite actor is Shatner because you like his strut. "Turnabout Intruder" is your favorite episode but you like the Star Trek movies best. You have a secret desire to be Christine Chapel.

Leo (July 22 - August 21):

Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate honest criticism. You write to K/S editors pointing out every typo in their zine. You hate everything you read in zines but keep buying the stuff for the artwork and the sex scenes. Your favorite Trek episode is "Mirror Mirror," and you like to kiss mirrors.

Virgo (August 22 - Sept 22): You are the logical type and hate disorder. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while screwing. You think [[Star Trek: The Motion Picture]] is the best film ever made and dream a lot about V'ger. You think Spock would be the perfect character if he could

submerge his human half more. You do not watch the Star Trek reruns because reading the Blish books is more fun.

Libra (Sept 23 - Oct 22): You are the artistic type and have a difficult time with reality. You liked gay literature before you discovered K/S. You like Kirk and

Spock abut wish they could have been played by David Soul and Paul Michael Glaser. You never understood why people made such a fuss over the death of Spock in TWOK. You killed him 117 times over in stories and poems.

Scorpio (Oct 23 - Nov 21):

Your favorite movie is Big Bad Mama and Visiting Hours. You went to see them before you knew Shatner was in them. You don't even like the guy. You're more into Klingons and have pictures of Kruge and Valkris over your bed. You only read K/S because it's deviant and not because you really care about it. Your favorite Trek episode is "The Savage Curtain." You are, most likely, a murderer.

Sagittarius (Nov 22 - Dec 21): You are reckless and unorganized. You order the same zine two or three times because you forget you have it. Your favorite actor in Trek is "all of them". People get exasperated around you because you can never make a decision. You like K/S hurt/comfort best and listen to Nimoy's albums as you read. You have the episode "The Empath" memorized.

Capricorn (Dec 22 - Jan 20): You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You are a closet Trekker and K/Ser. When ordering anything Trek related you use a different pen-name each time. You are secretly in love with David Gerrold and think Shatner and Nimoy are jerks. You wish Kirk and Spock were played by Phil Donahue and Alan Alda.

Aquarius (Jan 21 - Feb 19): You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You fantasize daily but tell others you never do that sort of thing. Your fantasies involve K/S and dungeons and chains. You like Orions and slavery. Your favorite Trek episodes are "Catspaw" and "The Empath."

Fan Comments

I giggled over the horoscope page on the inside back cover. As a Libran, I found my horoscope apt. I did kill Spock and other characters many times in reams of mercifully unpublished gen Trek written years ago. As for the Pisces horoscope - well that idea of Kirk and Spock being held captive here in the 20th Century sounds extremely familiar. I wonder under what astrological sign Our Intrepid Editor was born.