Wolf in the House

Fanfiction
Title:	Wolf in the House
Author(s):	JoeLawson
Date(s):	13 May 2015
Length:	33481 words
Genre(s):	Pre-slash fanfiction
Fandom(s):	Teen Wolf
Relationship(s):	Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski
External Links:	Wolf in the House (AO3)
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Wolf in the House is a Derek/Stiles story by JoeLawson.

Podfic cover art by reena_jenkins (2015)

Summary: “What? It’s totally an improvement. He’s not scowling, or dating bad guys, or slinking around in unsanitary places. Still a bit paranoid, but what can you do. At least he’s a lot easier to get along with when you can buy his affections with ear rubs.”

“And you always wanted a dog,” Sheriff added wryly.

“And I always wanted a dog.”

Recs and Reviews

In case it’s not clear by now: Derek Hale is my favorite character. Part of my reason for spending so much time diving into fandom is to find those stories that deal with Derek’s substantial canonical trauma and that provide him an opportunity to heal, with people who value him and give him the unflinching loyalty and unguarded affection that he so desperately needs.

Wolf in the House does all of this and more. It jumped right up to my Top Favorite Fics list, and it’s a fic that I’m certain I’ll re-read often. With that said, it isn’t an easy read: it faces Derek’s deeply ingrained issues head-on, and the picture isn’t a particularly pretty one. Fresh from the latest bout of torture and still healing from yet another near-death experience, Derek decides not to shift out of his fullwolf transformation:

“He had fought so hard, so often, and he’d lost all the time, because back when he’d been hairless and walking on two legs, he’d never really believed he could win. He’d thought too much, had been too sloppy, too afraid, because he’d always been Derekbabysweetie, the softheart in his pack, the keeper of obscure knowledge, the cuddly sweetsmile runt. This now, this was better. This was Wolf. This was Fuck You All. This was safer.”

The fic is told from Derek’s POV, which means it’s a mixture of hilarious and heartbreaking. He’s no less snarky as a wolf, and his eyebrows are equally eloquent. By relaxing into the less human part of his mind, his true feelings about those around him shine through the descriptors he uses to identify them. These include delightful introductions of Deaton-creepysneak, who offers very little help in turning Derek back to his two-legged form; a kitsune who makes his nose itch with the smell of ozone and flails awkwardly between the wolf-alpha and the hunter-cub; and the death-magic girl who tries to strap him into a pink harness and annoy him back to his human shape.

Then there is Stiles, who can’t help being a sarcastic little shit but who immediately gives Derek his unashamed affection and fierce protection; and the Sheriff, who slides seamlessly into the alpha role in their new pack, facepalming in exasperation, setting firm but fair rules, ensuring Derek is treated with kindness and respect, and reminding Stiles to not be such an asshole. Even Peter makes an appearance, with Derek’s superhuman senses opening a sympathetic window into his complex motivations, without negating his villainy and untrustworthiness.

Derek’s sense of self-worth is fragile, at best, entirely tied to what he can do for others to convince them to keep him around. This is the Derek who dragged himself to the school, wolfsbane sparking through his veins and poisoning his blood, and asked Scott and Stiles to save him because they needed him. This is the Derek who sank to the bottom of the pool, limbs numb from kanima venom, despair clogging his throat because his pleas to keep his head above water until he could fight off the monster for Stiles were too desperate and not convincing enough. This is the Derek who looked at Stiles in wide-eyed disbelief when he came back for him, when he told him he wasn’t an abomination. This is the Derek who fights relentlessly despite knowing he’ll fail, who sacrifices himself in every possible situation for anyone who needs help, who grits his teeth and bears it when people use his body, who buries layers of trauma under an angry, bristly exterior that belies the impossibly soft heart underneath.

When Derek - on four legs, with an emotion-betraying tail and soft ears that only Stiles is allowed to rub - begins to form a new pack with the Stilinskis, his lack of faith in his own value leads him to the latest in his line of patently bad decisions. He’ll resist the urge to “shake off the fur,” he decides quickly. The Stilinskis like him as the wolf. They welcome him into their home. They don’t ask difficult questions. They take care of him. They give him the home and pack and family he’s been aching for. “If he was good enough,” he thinks, “devoted enough, if he was no trouble and didn’t draw attention, maybe they’d forget that he’d once been more (or less, depending on your point of view). Maybe they’d let him stay forever.”

The journey through Derek’s mind unfolds beautifully, with a painful bleakness that’s balanced by the warmth of the Stilinski household. It’s a difficult, tear-jerking ride, but an ultimately hopeful story of a newly-formed, fiercely loyal little pack.

Inspired Fanworks

• Podfic by Reena Jenkins