'Surekill'ed That Possibility

Meta
Title:	'Surekill'ed That Possibility
Creator:	Fialka
Date(s):	February 2001
Medium:	online
Fandom:	The X-Files
Topic:
External Links:	'Surekill'ed That Possibility - Fialka, Archived version
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'Surekill'ed That Possibility is by Fialka.

It was part of a series. The author comments that: "Many of these essays first appeared as discussions on OBSSE, Scullyfic and/or ATXA."

The essay was first posted to The Annotated X-Files Study Guide and is at Fialka's Candybox.

Later, it was reposted:

Sadly, when the old NBCI server went the way of so many really cool, free things on the net, I never could find another free site with enough space to house the whole Study Guide, and it didn't get enough traffic to warrant paying for 250mb on a server somewhere. Not to mention, I no longer have as much time on my hands as I did back then, so like the UFOs...well, it is another UFO. Some of it still appears to be here, if you can wade your way through all the advertising on FortuneCity. I sure won't be insulted if you don't. These essays are from the original site, and appear here unchanged. Unlinked titles got abducted by aliens somewhere along the way. If you find them wandering dazed by the side of the road, could you be so kind as to send them home?

Excerpts

Ostensibly, I'm here to review the latest ep. Unfortunately, my review of the most recent mass of four-day-old fishguts masquerading as an X-File consists of one word: feh. I find myself playing with episode titles instead -- Yup, that Surekilled any vestiges of hope I was harbouring, and I am out of Patience with 1013. Stop me if I'm wrong, but I seem to remember that it was possible to have both character *and* plot. Merciful (ICE) heavens (UNRUHE) what a (PUSHER) ridiculous (ONE BREATH) idea.

I've long said that Carter doesn't actually know how to write -- certainly he has trouble with the concept of full sentences in those utterly unwieldy monologues -- but the idea that 1013 *et al* are trumpeting the fact that they're ignoring the first lesson of Storytelling 101 (namely, that *character* dictates plot, not the other way around) is scary. It tells me, fully and finally, that they have absolutely no idea what they're doing to the show, or how people are reacting to their wonderful new "cool scary stories." If there actually was some decent Scully and yes, decent Doggett in these things we might forgive them for the fact that their plot never got out of the garage, or ran off the road halfway through Act II, but there isn't. Not because they *can't* do it -- we know they can. Even Carter -- master of the idiotic swiss cheese plot redeemed by splendid bits of M/S interaction (THE JERSEY DEVIL) -- .can do it. But because they *won't* do it. And they think this is A Good Thing. Idiots. Flipping idiots.

So, apparently even Doggett isn't going to be allowed to get in the way of all these yummy yummy plots. I'm not even going to get into pregnancy versimilitude from a group of men who know damn well what Scully/GA looks like when she's pregnant, and if they've forgotten I hear she's on set sometimes to film her four minutes. They could try asking. But no. That would be *research* and apparently research is on the proscribed list this year along with things like Character Development, Mulder, Pregnancy Padding, and Accurate Sentence Structure. Still, I'm pleased about The Girly Girl. No, really. Maybe once she's on board, *she* can do all the apologising to The Manly Man and we can have our feisty, brilliant, tough-even-though-her-heart-is-breakingTakeChargeAndKickButt!Scully back again. You know, all summer I kept saying I wanted to be wrong about this year, and for a brief, shining moment it appeared I would be. And I was happy. I really was. I would still be happy, nay thrilled, to turn around at the end of February and say 'I was wrong, it was the pain of transition and slack must be cut for the wobbly first half of the season because they've really found their equilibrium again.' I want to say that they reached into their little puckered arses and pulled out roses, not some poor legless Indian dude on rusty wheels. But every ep I see, every spoiler I hear, just makes it seem less and less likely to happen. It's a sad, sad thing when Sunday night no longer brings the thrill of anticipation, but the dread of being utterly disappointed. Again.