The Destroyer (Star Trek zine)

Zine
Title:	The Destroyer
Publisher:	Klingons of Louisiana (KOLA) and Shoe-String Press
Editor(s):	K'orgeaun epetai-K'warf (Harold Wiebelt), Fleet Admiral K'Eve epetai-K'elland (Steve Kelland), Fleet Captain Kang sutai-Padraig (Patrick Degan), Romulan Representative Bekha-t'Hakar (Bonnie Hudnall), and Captain K'Lon vestai-VehBah (Mike Whalen)
Date(s):	1990?-?
Series?:
Medium:	print
Genre:	gen
Fandom:	Star Trek
Language:	English
External Links:
Click here for related articles on Fanlore.

'The Destroyer is a series of Star Trek zines with a focus on Klingons.

It is the "Official Propagandazine of the Klingons of Louisiana."

Note: one word is constantly spelled two ways in this zine: "epetai" and "eptai."

From the first issue:

We welcome back all fellow Klin who have awaited our return with patience. Putting out propaganda can be a monumental undertaking in the face of various campaigns in the fandom community. We have, suffice to say, been busier than a swarm of pirhanna [sic] fish stripping the flesh off hapless persons unfortunate/stupid enough to ignore all the "No Swimming" signs posted along the Amazon.

The philosophy of "The Destroyer" is that fandom is for the strong, the free, and the insane. Our goal is to ultimately become as esoteric and creative as the seemingly worthless bum showing outward signs of schizophrenia but who may actually be on to something in all his talk about aliens being in league with devil dogs in the sewers to control our brains by radio signals.

"The Destroyer" is about to set off in new and uncharted directions...

beware, the Big Green Dragon, Kang

Issue 0

cover of issue #0

The Destroyer 0 was published in 1990(?) and contains 17 pages.

• short descriptions of some Klingon fan publications: Mindscanner, Behind the Lines (newsletter for the Klingon Strike Force), Agonizer, Disruptor, Where Did This Come From?, ChuyDahl, Far Flung Flyer, Delta Fee, Levek, Lyret Dedreen
• a con report by Kang called "The MsKon Kampaign" which took place in Jackson, Mississippi (guest artist at this con was Mary Hanson-Roberts)
• some "kharacter profiles"
• very detailed instructions on how to create a Klingon Levek Combat Dagger out of Christmas ornaments, a Captain Courage knife handle, rubber bands, and super glue
• many humorous parodies of Star Trek products

• 

  sample page from issue #0

• 

  sample page from issue #0

• 

  sample page from issue #0

• 

  sample page from issue #0

Issue 8

cover of issue #8

The Destroyer 8 was published in November 1991 and contains 24 pages.

The table of contents is inexplicably in alphabetical order.

• a flyer for CoastCon '92, a flyer for RecKon
• Klingon cartoons
• kharacter profiles

This issue contains a con report for "SAGA .5" (a one-day gaming con held in Kenner at the Airport Sheraton, "The .5 means it's a pre-con conned one as a test to estimate what kind of showing SAGA can expect as a full weekend convention."):

This mini-con is a first for the recently founded Southern Area Gaming Association, and I'm tempted to be biased towards it. As you can see. from my last few reports on other so-called established local conventions, I am (to put it mildly) annoyed at them. So I'll try to be honest in this report.

The Klingons of Louisiana have been very busy this month, so we weren't able to put on any events at this convention — with the proud exception of Lieutenant K'Ich Vesti K'Ome, who Game Mastered a Klingon Role Playing Game. I wasn't able to attend this game, having arrived too late in the day, but K'Ich ran it wearing his new spiked Klingon vest. He managed not to draw his own blood, so it must have gone smoothly.

SAGA had no panel events, but they did sponsor two video rooms. SAGA put up half the money for the ALBOE room, and KOTE got theirs free. Although the price was right, video rooms at a gaming con have now been proved to be superfluous. The rooms had an hourly attendance rate of one person (not counting the personnel actually running the room). In order to prevent the day from becoming a total waste of time. Hoi lie Domiano and Jim Hingle passed the hat for impromptu party money — which Jim then subsidized (doubled) — for the ALBOE room. The party was attended mostly by club members, but at least we got a chance to talk with each other and have a good time doing that. (The orgy was voted down due to the presence of minors. Boohoo.)

I passed the time by playing Klin-Zah with anyone willing to learn. Being a Klingon, I had an unfair advantage, so I handicapped myself by drinking Dragon Stout until I couldn't see straight. I won every game, but one Romulan gave me a run for it. E tried to teach a few people reflective Klin-Zah, but after explaining the rules, they decided it would be better for their sanity if they refrained.

I heard many complaints about this convention, but none of them seemed to be coming from the gamers, and that's who the con was for. So as a gaming convention, I can't truthfully express an opinion about how it was run. As a regular convention, however. it was a complete flop. To be fair, though, the organizers didn't advertise it as anything BUT a gaming con, and the gaming rooms did seem to be well run and well attended. The con did pull in about two hundred people, at five bucks a head. To sum up. if you are a gamer, this event would be worth investigating. If you go to cons to schmooze, or attend panels, or be entertained, this is not the con for you.

This issue contains a lengthy description of the club and expectations:

Khi, Fellow Warriors!

This is Fleet Admiral K'Eve Eptai K'Elland (yeah, that's right. Eptai) at the Ball At The End Of The Universe. I became KLINGON OF THE YEAR and was rewarded the ultimate honorific of "Eptai." What does this great honor mean? Why, more work (of course) and more responsibilities! Also, now that I am in the Admiralty where the Fleet can keep an eye on me, I'll actually have to live up to my honorific. (Sigh... Gone are the good ol' days of swanning about the Galaxy taking Olympian-length shore leaves and doctoring up the records afterwards...) Now I have to finally finish work on the new Klingon Charter... Egads! Imagine it... I have to bring order to anarchy... A worthy challenge!

This is what we have so far. The Klingons of Louisiana run on the Klingon Honor System, with the accent on HONOR. The most continually productive members earn the right to sit on the voting Council. The Council will consist of a maximum of five members, and the little voting done will be by the Council. Members who fall below a certain level of productivity will be classified as "inactive" (or "dead wood," as Admiral K'Worf prefers to refer to them), and will be stricken from the membership. If an inactive member doesn't like this, he (or she or it) can do one of two things: either enter a Council-approved Probationary Period (and work back into favor) or start a new club. Who chooses the members of the voting Council? Why, the voting Council — of course! This isn't a democracy, it's the Empire, it's the productive minority who rule, not the majority.

Now, you may ask how the club can grow when every member doesn't have a voice in running things. Reasonable question. This system involves a trade-off. We are trading mindless bureaucracy for efficiency. Other clubs are suffering from suffocating rules and stifling regulations about taking every little thing to the main membership for a vote. We want to keep things as simple as possible and save time for fun.

How do you join the Klingons of Louisiana? It's not easy, but then nothing worthwhile ever is. If you are too far away to attend monthly meetings (held on the fourth Saturday of each month) and be directly involved, all you have to do to receive our newsletter is send me (or Admiral K'Worf) a little article or artwork — anything you can put together will be fine. The newsletter is published monthly, and if you have submitted something to it, we'll send you a copy. If you are in the area and can attend meetings, contact us and we'll tell you when and where the next meeting will be. At the meeting, we will determine how you wish to contribute to the club and, if we can use your talents, you will be accepted. We don't want your money. Bribes are for weaklings, not warriors. We don't want weaklings, and we don't ask you to submit yourself to our whims. All members are respected for what they can bring to the club, and we expect all our members to stand up for their beliefs and rights. Our members must show Klingon spirit to join. Klingons are a race of HONOR!

Our meetings are gatherings of warriors. We begin with club business, quickly vote on any new campaigns, ask for volunteers and assign duties to those best fitted for them. We then open the Arena. Arena is an open discussion about anything and everything relating to fandom and the club. If any member has a complaint about the club or other members, he (or she or it) is encouraged to bring it up in this forum. A mediator is selected who will hear all sides of the argument and decide on the course of action and the outcome. The purpose of the Arena is to vent any pent-up hostility or complaints so that they can be resolved and therefore not interfere with the merry-making afterwards. After Arena, members can watch videos, play games, schmooze with each other, tell glorious lies of battles, or torture small furry animals — depending upon personal preference.

Well, if all this hasn't frightened you away, then you may have the mettle to become a Klingon. If so, sign up today! QUAPLA!

• 

  inside page from issue #8

• 

  inside page from issue #8

• 

  inside page from issue #8

• 

  inside page from issue #8

• 

  inside page from issue #8

• 

  inside page from issue #8

Issue 9

cover of issue #9

The Destroyer 9 was published in late 1991 and contains 22 pages.

• updates on model building
• kharacter profiles
• poem: "To What Purpose?" by K'Lar
• a Klin-Kin-Dex, which is a listing of all known Klingon fan clubs and organizations
• a reprint of a rant called Hell, No, Creations Cons -- We Won't Go! The problem with...©reation (reprinted from Tricorder Readings #28, also in Power Star #50)

• a flyer for RocKon
• a flyer for The New Orleans Worst Film Festival 2, "The Wrath of NOWFF!!"
• flyer for the con Miss-Con
• a full-page flyer for Trexindex

The editor wrote:

WARRIORS!

This is the ninth issue of THE DESTROYER, the new Klingons Of Louisiana newsletter. We will review upcoming and past campaigns, including a report on the upcoming MISSCON by Fleet Admiral K'Elland.

Because of certain negative issues affecting our participation, HOUSECON '92 and COASTCON '92 will not be attended by a KOLA contingent. Two upcoming campaigns that will be attended by KOLA members are MISSCON '92 and ROCKON '92. These two conventions will be discussed at our next monthly meeting, which will most likely be in March because of Mardi Gras conflicts in February. All member warriors will be notified of date and time changes.

For information on either MISSCON '92 or ROCKON '92, see the update information included in this issue. For further details contact Admiral K'Warf (phone number redacted) or Fleet Admiral K'Elland (phone number redacted).

Upcoming discussion for 1992 will be fund raising events, a visit to a crippled childrens' hospital (which I have not received any information about yet), Klingon battle games, and costume making parties.

MAY ALL OUR VICTORIES BE GLORIOUS...

The club endorses another club:

Hold it, put that disruptor away and hear what I have to say. Kola, as a group, if not as individuals, embodies the ideals of the Next Generation Era, where honor, service, and loyalty take precedence over self interest. Our basic motivation is to aid in the growth of Star Trek fandom.

"But the Next Generation Klingons are the mortal enemies of the Romulans. How can Klingons exist without enemies?"

Believe me, we don't have to go looking for problems to find them. Just waving the banner of growth in fandom and rallying the destruction of entropy have given us lots of enemies in the old guard of local fandom. After all many of the old guards like things just the way they are. They see new ideas as a threat to their self indulgent conservatism. Oops, I'm starting to sound like Karl Marx when I'm trying to sound like Groucho. And so it's in our best interest to help out the "Next Generation" of local fandom. The "Westbank Alliance of Romulans" or "WAR," as it is known as at this time (or at least until they come up with a snazzier name), is being organized by Bonnie Hudnall. She is looking for input to help in it's structuring. She's also looking for members, so any of you disenfranchised Vulcans or closet Romulans take heed band contact her. Her address is: [redacted]

If you don't have any ready info, send her a letter of encouragement. And if you don't send some encouragement her way, I'll throw your favorite pet on the barbie at my next picnic.

Club members are preparing for a trip to RocKon:

I am honored your group is coming to RocKon in May and I hope that some of you will find yourselves members of the Klingon Assassins' League before the weekend is over! That happened with the Death Strike, a KAG ship from Oklahoma City, the captain ended up joining and is now the head of the Imperial Guard section of KAG. I must apologize for my lateness in responding but the movie premiere and the holidays have kept me busy.

Yes, we will need volunteers for some panels. I win let you know where you can help as soon as the program is made up. If we can't fit every volunteer on the panel, then they could serve as honor guards during that time.

We will also be doing a Klingon Love Poetry Reading, probably during our traditional Klingon Invasion Party on Saturday night (or should I say EARLY Sunday morning?) What we'd like to do is auction off the "readers" for charity during the Art Auction (of course the readers would be us Klingons). So you might want to be preparing poetry (though we hope to have some on hand). It can be serious, humorous or Shakespeare. We MIGHT have prop furniture and other "heavy" objects available.

As for the Invasion Party, whatever you can donate will be greatly appreciated. If you are over 21, booze please (vodka is GREATLY needed for the Hellfire, the traditional Assassins drink which you may have sampled at other cons -it is sweeping Klingon groups across that nation and was originated by the KAL). Munchies and whatever else. Our con doesn't supply beer because of the cost (and the fact our con is so small we don't really have a security force) so beer would be okay as well. But beware, we are very strict on the 21 drinking age. Softdrinks should be available from the con since the party is currently planned for the consuite.

Speaking of security, this is a no weapons convention. No fake weapons, no real weapons, NO WATER GUNS ARMED OR UNARMED. However, for the costume contest it is okay and last year we took our "weapons" to the Invasion party merely to show them off - but no pulling them out at anyone or any sort of play like that. In fact, unless you are entering the costume contest and MUST have a weapon for your presentation, I'd suggest you leave them at home. I'd like to be able to carry my weapon, even peace bonded, but we've had too much trouble in the past. Sigh.

We need volunteers, in costume, to serve as runners for the art show that will be held after the costume contest. It is a Klingon auction this year. The two auctioneers will be Klingons (myself and my Klingon "twin brother" Kaldron of KAG and KAL). If someone has experience in art shows or art auctions we need them all the more, but this is not a hard job. We do require gloves or absolutely no makeup on the hands so we don't damage the art.

A fan's essay, "Fandom from a Teen's Eye View" by K'ather Boetai Kool:

I have been in the southern con circuit since, well, as long as I can remember. I have witnessed fandom feuding (even in my own home) for the past several years. I am not new to fan politics and have often been aware of more goings on than many of the adults involved. Only within the last year have I seen any fan circle deteriorate to the point of phasing itself out.

What I have to say is rather simple. Being only fourteen, this is all people wish me to say. I would like to point out to many people the importance of keeping fandom alive for the next generation of con go-ers and stargasers. We're here and waiting to enter the wonderful world of Sci-Fi fandom.

Because of all- the waves that have been created in this area's fan politics, many of the young fans are becoming scared to develop into full-fledged fans. Those who have not been scared have been given the impression that bad fandom habits and rivalry are natural, which they are most definitely not.

I have sat back and watched the goings on in New Orleans fandom since the trouble started. I wanted to see how far the "grown-ups" could take it. This may seem one sided of me, but I have chosen to speak my mind now because I have seen fandom being ruined for "The Next Generation."

Since the dawn of time, men have bonded themselves together and put aside their rivalry in the pursuit of what they enjoy. Now, the thing I and many of my friends enjoy is going down the proverbial tube because the ones that came before us had forgotten how to forget.

I believe that I have made my point to those of you who care. I ask you. please, give us a chance to experience fandom the way it should be experienced.

Issue 10

cover of issue #10

The Destroyer 10 was published in spring 1992 and contains 22 pages.

• From the High Command (1)
• State of Kola Address (2)
• Kharacter Profile "Captain Kang sutai-Padraig" (3)
• The Budget QuarterMaster (directions on how to create a $10 Imperial Klingon Head, via The Claytex Method" and "The Twenty Dollar Replicator") (6)
• K'Toons (10)
• Kola QuarterMaster (12)
• Klin-Kin-Dex (updated list of Klingon clubs and zines) (14)
• Koventions & Kampaigns (much info about RocKon May 1-3, 1992 and Miss-Con May 8-10, 1992) (16)
• Inspirational Media (18)
• Kons (19)
• Kola ArKives (21)

• 

  inside page from issue #10, directions for making a Klingon head

• 

  inside page from issue #10, Inspirational Media

• 

  inside page from issue #10, flyer for "Miss-Con"