Journey's End (Star Trek: TOS story by Jenna Sinclair)

For other uses of this title, see Journey's End.

Fanfiction
Title:	Journey's End
Author(s):	Jenna Sinclair
Date(s):	1996
Length:
Genre(s):	slash
Fandom(s):	Star Trek: TOS
Relationship(s):	Kirk/Spock
External Links:	The Kirk/Spock Fanfiction Archive
Click here for related articles on Fanlore.

Journey's End is a Kirk/Spock story by Jenna Sinclair. The art is by Shelley Butler.

It was published in the print zine T'hy'la #17 (1996).

Summary

"The crew think Kirk and Spock have parted when, as the mission ends, they seem to be avoiding each other."

Series

• Sharing the Sunlight
• Reflections on a Lunar Landscape
• Pursuing Hyacinths
• Heart's Delight
• Primal Scream
• Parallel Courses
• Double Trouble
• Son of Sarek
• Promises to Keep
• Setting Course
• Jagged Edges
• Manna
• Journey’s End
• One Night
• In the Shade

Reactions and Reviews

1996

I'm writing this review from memory of a quick read, having left my copy of this zine behind at Shore Leave. Apologies to the author for not writing a more thorough review based on more than one reading.

A short but satisfying addition to the "Sharing the Sunlight" series, this is an account from Uhura's perspective of the end of the five-year mission. Uhura's concern about Kirk's and Spock's relationship is convincing; the author maintains the dramatic tension most effectively as each new piece of information seems to confirm Uhura's worst fears.

The first person narration by Uhura is one of the story's many strengths. It brings the reader up close not only to Uhura, but to other continuing secondary characters in the "Sharing the Sunlight" series as well. As I understand the role of those continuing characters, is to fulfill at least three functions: (1) to add to our understanding of Kirk's and Spock's relationship by letting us see it from different perspectives; (2) to create continuing subplots that enrich the series dramatically and provide unity and continuity among the stories and novels; and (3) to create "texture," the rich detail of shipboard life. This story succeeds admirably in all three of these areas. This success helped me put my finger on what I would have liked to see more of in the rest of the series--a look at the secondary characters really up close, rather than from a relative distance or as seen through the eyes of Kirk and Spock (who after all as Captain and First Officer must maintain a certain distance from the junior officers under their command). The narration doesn't have to be in the first person to be up close, but it does need to be more intimate than the distant universal narrator. Seen up close, we'd get to know the secondary characters better, we'd learn more about what it's like to serve on the Enterprise, and we'd get to see Kirk and Spock more nearly as others see them. I'm certainly not saying that this hasn't happened in "Sharing the Sunlight"—It has of course. This story simply whetted my appetite for a closer look.

Perhaps Uhura reached more closure at the end of this story than was warranted by the facts as she presented them (she's an observant woman). I have a feeling there's more to the story than she told us ... and I'm looking forward to reading it in Jenna's next novel.

Unusually and beautifully told from Uhura's point of view, this story takes place at the end of the 5 year mission.

Uhura's compassionate perspective and loving view of Kirk and Spock and the Enterprise is expertly portrayed. I also enjoyed the glimpses into her past and her psyche (including a painful experience with a lover) and what led her to the stars.

Uhura sees all. hears all and is the model of discretion even when faced with a bigoted crewperson (a character very well drawn). What a terrific character to observe our captain and first officer.

I loved the moment on the bridge when Spock tells Kirk he'll be in the botany lab and Kirk doesn't look up which leads Uhura to speculate: "The captain always looked at his first officer. At the beginning of the mission he looked as if Spock were an irresistible challenge, then later as if his eyes were hungry and he couldn't see enough."

Totally sad as Uhura contemplates leaving her quarters and there are wonderful moments when she looks at various clothes in her wardrobe and wonders if she can wear them on earth and they evoke memories of when and where she first wore them. I loved the juxtaposition of her painful memories with Kirk and Spock's love.

Wonderful writing like this when she observes Kirk; "Jim Kirk is a tiger, wild and beautiful, and when he paces on the bridge he's stalking his prey in a most primitive dance, graceful and deadly."

Woven into the overall picture of the ending mission is Kirk who must face his failure to protect his fallen crewmembers and Uhura's terrible feeling that Kirk and Spock's love has died, too.

Of course. I was totally delighted to see Kirk and Spock dancing together! One of my favorite things!

The only difficulty I had with this story was the pervasive hopelessness. The mission was ending, they'd never have the Enterprise again, life was over as they knew it. Sad is one thing, but without some glimmer of hope for the future, I was left just swinging in the wind.

But there certainly is no question as to the skill and talent of this author who in this story helped make one of my favorite "other" characters come to life.

I love how we don’t immediately know that it is Uhura who is telling us this story. A disturbing beginning as she describes the events leading up to her selection for and acceptance of her first deep space assignment aboard the Enterprise. The first person account works extremely well here and is unique (so far) in Jenna’s "Sharing the Sunlight" universe. I practically felt Shadala’s slap impact on her face, accepted with her the death of a relationship that meant so much. The first person perspective also enhanced the K/S relationship for me, seeing Kirk and Spock through the eyes of a loving but somewhat objective observer.

Masterful is the only word I have for the way the author leads us down the garden path, dropping clues like bread crumbs, almost daring us to jump to the conclusions she knows we are unwilling to accept. I will admit she had me going. I actually found myself going through the same mental contusions that Uhura was experiencing, and I realized I needed for Kirk and Spock’s relationship to succeed as much as Uhura did! That this was in doubt is a tribute to this author’s storytelling abilities.

A wonderful scene with Colleen O’Shaughnessey in the rec room. Boy, I just wanted to slap her. Loved how Irina and Sulu, and Uhura defended the guys. Especially Uhura’s thought that “Love is love, in whatever guise it takes. Love is good.” So simple. So perfect. I melted.

Jenna’s characters are always so “real” to me. I see and hear them so clearly. I liked the details of Uhura’s communications work. So that’s what she does all day.) The memorial ceremony was perfectly realized. Made me feel I was there. So moving. Loved that Uhura and the others sang Banned from Argo in the rec room, though I will admit that I was very glad Spock didn’t walk in while they were singing the verse about him. (Hmmm... Wonder how he would have reacted to that?) Even the minor detail of Uhura thinking whether the clothes she has in her closet would now be considered out of fashion back on Earth serves to flesh out the character. We empathize with her because any one of us might have the same thoughts. Little details such as this one plant the reader firmly in the character’s head so that later we accept the character’s perceptions of events as our own. A very subtle manipulation of the reader’s view, and this author does it so well.

I’m not crazy about the choice of Penda as Uhura’s first name. I prefer Nyota, but I realize that Penda predates Nyota in fan canon. Nyota is just more pleasing to my ear. And I’m not sure I accept that just four days from Earth and the ending of the five year mission the Enterprise would be able to fit in shore leave, or that it would be allowed by the brass, but these are such minor quibbles I almost hesitate to mention them.

Lovely last scene. Kirk’s wink is delicious. Hints that Uhura may be on the verge of finding the relationship she is looking for. Great how this ties in with the opening scene.

A very satisfying story by an author at the top of her form. Prepare to be impressed by this author’s skill. I am.

I loved this story, though its overall tone was sad. First-person Uhura at the end of the five-year mission; I very much like this perspective.

Juxtaposed with Uhura's observations of Kirk and Spock (a year after the events of "Promises to Keep") we get her feelings of wondering if she'll ever find true love....

She had been with a man who was physically violent to her. That she feels she loved him anyway, I found distasteful. Of course, this is a complex subject not neatly explained one way or the other, but I do wonder why JS decided to put this in Uhura's history.

Stupid Colleen announces self-satisfiedly, it's all over between the captain and Mr. Spock. She hates Kirk and Spock being lovers; she's for the old values, says Earth is much more conservative than when they left five years ago (the Eternists, etc.). Of course Uhura is totally behind Kirk and Spock; she's become a defender of the cause, once she saw how difficult it can be for same-sex relationships.

I know it's because I have little tolerance for religion as we know it today, but I had to yawn at Irina being worried about her parents meeting Brian because he's not Catholic. People certainly will not be able to remain so parochial after generations of being a space-traveling society (the Eternists notwithstanding they're not parochial, but retro-extremists). M/M Hunyady accepted their daughter going out in space; they ought to just be glad she's married a male, a human, forget Catholic. Can you imagine: Now Rini honey, you go out on deep space duty and be sure to find yourself a nice Catholic boy.

We see how everything Uhura is observing about Kirk and Spock says to her that they're drifting apart, just like stupid Colleen said. So Uhura's observations and feelings were not just random; rather, they had a focus, a slant, because of this idea she got into her head. This is the sort of element that make Jenna's writing superlative.

I liked all the ship's business, EOM being a very busy time for all departments to get totally ship-shape and tie up every little detail. All the communications coming in, etc. Of course, Uhura is privy to just about everything: reassignments, accommodations for the weeks/months of debriefing on Earth. The question is, are Kirk and Spock going to be open about their relationship through all the PR hoopla back on Earth? (Maybe we'll get a story about this, too.)

Unfortunately, every little thing she sees between Kirk and Spock seems to confirm the worst. And she's distressed that she cares so very much. And if their love maybe isn't lasting, what hope does she have for a lasting love?

I enjoyed all her musings, such as that her clothes will probably be passe on Earth now.

I like her friendship with Sulu.

I love Uhura's (Jenna's) image of Kirk as a tiger strength and cunning.

Mention of the pon farr in PTK brought me back to dwell there in that story. Powerful.

The memorial service for the 57 dead was very moving. What a beautiful, unique touch.

So, then, the final scene to bring all this together. On a last, quick shore leave before the final haul back to Earth, Uhura and Sulu go out for dinner and dancing at a nice club. The climax of the story comes down to some wonderful moments when Uhura sees Kirk and Spock there. Such a beautiful description of it, moment by moment, as she watches them. Really got to my heart. And Sulu's such a friend and such a fine dancer, maybe love for her isn't so far away after all...

So everything makes sense, her misinterpretation of what she had been seeing. We are left hanging as to how Kirk and Spock's life will be in the immediate future, but with no question as to their love....

What a wonderful story, with unique perspective and plenty of creative touches.

Thanks, Jenna. Thanks a lot. I got angina as I worried my way through this story.

This is a first person Uhura story which has a perspective I don’t remember seeing before. As usual, it was beautifully written and full of interesting characters and dialogue.

So what was my problem? She set it up so that I didn’t know if Kirk and Spock were about to break apart , (as suggested by that odious ensign) or what. It drove me nuts and almost caused me to glance at the last page, just to be sure.

If the author meant to spread seeds of doubt and anxiety in her reader she was well rewarded in me! However, there was a sweet and satisfactory ending so all is forgiven.

This is a bittersweet first person Uhura story set in the author's "Sharing the Sunlight" universe. It takes place at the end of the five year mission, hence the title and the term bittersweet above. Now, as a rule, I don't particularly care for stories told by a third person about our guys, but when they're done as well as this... Hey, what can I say? Rules are made to be broken.

A bigoted crewmember has planted the seed of suspicion that all is not right with the captain and his first officer. That they are no longer in love. As Uhura watches the two men even more closely, she begins to fear that the hateful bigot's remarks are true. Her memories of incidents in her own past are interspersed nicely with her thoughts of Kirk and Spock. The scene in her quarters where she inspects her clothing and the memories they conjure up is especially moving.

Jenna writes so well of small, wonderful moments such as when Uhura remembers how Kirk had always looked at Spock" as if his eyes were hungry and he couldn't see enough." Now admit it, haven't we all seen and treasured those telling little looks that popped up on the screen from time to time? If eyes could eat, then Jim Kirk obviously thought of Spock as a seven course meal. Loved the scene at the end where Uhura sees Kirk and Spock dancing and realizes that all of her earlier fears are groundless. She was so relieved and sigh...so was I.

From the time of her first novel, (my favorite, by the way) this author has had the ability and talent to weave real stories about real people. There is nothing superficial or cardboard about the characters she writes about with so much love. As you read about the ongoing adventures of Kirk and Spock and the rest of the Enterprise crew, you really believe that there is a silver starship out there somewhere, carrying this wonderful bunch of people across the galaxy at warp speed. And this fine seventeen page story is no exception.

If I have any complaint at all, it's the same one I have about "Promises to Keep" and "Jagged Edges". There's just so damn much hopelessness and despair pervading these three stories that I can't help wanting to say, "Enough already with the pain and suffering." Not that I have anything against a little pain and suffering mind you, but isn't it about time to resolve the situation and move on to something more upbeat? This is just my own personal observation and not to be taken as a criticism. Jenna writes terrific stories of "real people" and their problems, while everyone knows I live in Fantasyland and have an obsession with "happily ever after."

So get going on that third novel, Jenna. You just can't leave me and our guys hanging like this.

1997

I was struck by the way the entire plot was thematically linked—the memorial service for those who had died during the five year mission, the end of the mission itself and the speculation among the crew about K/S coming to an end. Through the process of dealing with the sadness of all these endings, we experience for ourselves the truth that love really can overcome loss. I really needed that message of hope. Since I am currently in mourning for my housemate, this story had a particularly powerful impact on me.

The conspiring between Amanda and McCoy to get Kirk and Spock together backfires when Kirk refuses to bond with Spock. The scene where Spock drops to his knees and asks Kirk to become his bondmate brings the house down. Kirk’s rejection cries out.

I was anxious to find out where Spock would find the strength to go on as if nothing had happened. Unfortunately, that remains a blank. Kirk has sex with several females and even a male. We get no reaction from Spock?

The time between Kirk’s rejection of Spock and his admission to Spock about filling the emptiness inside is given as an intermezzo—facts only. Taking us on a journey through their feelings, letting us feel with them and through them just isn’t there.

Then we come to the scene where Kirk asks Spock to bond them and Spock casually accepts without much ado. I don’t think so.

I enjoyed the first part, but the second and third part couldn’t entice me. In particular because there is no apparent structure which might give us an insight into their emotions and how they’ve been dealing with the changing situation between them.

1998

This is part of Jenna’s “Sharing the Sunlight” series, but it’s told from Uhura’s point of view—an interesting and enjoyable approach. The story is set at the end of the first five-year mission, when an understandable combination of anticipation and dread is in the air: People are making plans for the next phase of their lives, while at the same time looking back at the phase which is ending (one particularly poignant part of the looking back is a memorial service held to honor all of the Enterprise officers and crew who died during the course of the mission).

Uhura herself is plagued with concerns about what direction her life should take, and her own personal fears, regrets, and ambitions are reflected in what she sees of the life and love which Kirk and Spock share.

One specific scene I just have to mention: normally, I’m not particularly fond of scenes in which Kirk and Spock dance, but Jenna’s is so well done I really liked it—both men really seem completely in character. I would love to see a drawing based on this scene (hint, hint to all you artists out there).

2004

Only recently did I purchase "Sharing the Sunlight" and read the beginning of this author's Kirk/Spock universe, after already having read the short story zine which is set after the novel. Wonderful! That said, "Journey's End" is a very worthy addition to this rich universe, and a favorite of mine because it is written from the POV and daily life of secondary characters, mainly Uhura. Jenna is particularly adept at this perspective because of her attention to detail and her penchant for writing very complete settings and characterizations. This is an author who obviously loves to take the time to color in every aspect of character motivations and interactions; whose grasp of human (and Vulcan!) psychology runs to deep understanding of its intricacies. Coupled with her knowledgeable approach to writing style, it always yields a great result.

"Journey's End" is about just that; the end of the Enterprise's original five year mission, with both its busyness and its unavoidable emotional impact. Uhura, a career officer with one or two painfully failed relationships behind her, semi-consciously depends on the captain and Spock to help keep alive her belief in love-as-possible for career officers, especially for herself. When a spiteful, unhappy crewmate plants the idea that Kirk and Spock are no longer together, a shaken Uhura, while scoffing on the surface, begins to filter everything she sees through eyes of doubt, and everything she sees seems to add up to no good news.

Through moments of self-examination, determination and will, and with the cheerful, determined help of her good friend—and possibly more—Hikaru Sulu, Uhura prepares her department for end of mission and allows herself to relax during Enterprise's last shore leave before arriving home. And while discovering a love relationship may be closer for her than she ever realized, she also discovers that love is not dead between Kirk and Spock, but is as alive and more beautiful than ever.

A few moments make this story memorable for me; One is a paean to Jenna's writing style. Uhura is moping, and Sulu pulls her down to the rec room for an impromptu get together with all the alpha bridge crew. Spock stops in for some tea, and gets pulled in to play his lyre, while Uhura sings. The same spiteful crewwoman, Colleen, asks them to play, "All Thats Gone", a sad, lost-love piece, purposefully changing the mood and rubbing in her assertion that, in fact, love is gone. Jenna ends the scene lingeringly, without resolving the issues, without bringing Uhura any relief from her sadness and doubts. It simply dwindles to a close, with wisps of grief and pain in the air, not overblown, but just perfectly done.

The second is more upbeat; "There are very few men who can cross their legs as flamboyantly as the captain does, and still maintain an air of masculinity, and yet the captain can, and he's in love with another man." That line just about embodies all of Kirk's body language and charm, to me. Oh my...how can you not love that man? After all, he charmed the pants off our favorite Vulcan. Thanks, Jenna, for an emotionally rich addition to your series.

Why, I asked myself, am I reading a story about Uhura's memories of a failed love affair? A little further on I knew the answer to that question, but it was replaced by other more perplexing ones. It seems current events on the Enterprise have reminded Uhura that no matter how special a love appears, it may not last. Rumors are afloat that Kirk and Spock are no longer "together." Their becoming a couple, it seems, wasn't a secret for long, but now there are signs of trouble.

The five year mission is about to end. Everyone is busier than usual with end of mission assignments. Does that account for the miniscule amount of time Kirk and Spock are seen together? Spock isn't even on the bridge routinely, as he is allegedly busy in another area, wrapping up projects. The more Uhura hears, the more concerned she becomes. They haven't been in the gym together, they don't take meals together. Then, as communications officer she comes across their accommodation requests for Earth. Miles apart. Reading this, I was both absorbed and afraid. I did not want this to be a story where Kirk and Spock part, with Spock making that stupid trip to Gol. Uhura was experiencing the same apprehension. As much as she tried to deny seeing the signs, she kept seeing them. Even as she assured others everything was all right between their commanding officers, she saw those things that told her otherwise. She thought about how they always used to capture each others eyes on the bridge and wondered just how long it had been since she'd seen such an exchange.

The evidence was clear. Spock agreed to join an impromptu music session just long enough to participate in a song about lost love. Then came the inspired memorial service for all those Enterprise crew members who were not making the return trip to Earth. Kirk was eloquent and very sad, but just when Uhura knew that Spock was going to step up and stand alongside the captain for support, he stood quite still, remaining apart.

This was heartbreaking to me, seeing all of this through the eyes of a person who was struggling not to believe what her eyes and ears kept telling her. My early concerns about the content of the story had, of course, dissolved in the strong story telling capabilities of this author.

When they’re on a planet just days out from Earth, Uhura agrees to accompany Sulu to an exclusive club to take her mind off having seen the end of the most beautiful relationship she'd ever witnessed. This is where the most remarkable and special scene occurs. One of those that you know has found a permanent place in your memory—just as it did Uhura's. Dancing with Sulu, she sees the two people she least wants to see sitting in a booth, apparently having a disagreement. Determined, she keeps dancing, and when she next looks over her partner's shoulder, all the pieces of her shattered world fall into place like a movie of splintering glass playing in reverse. Kirk stands and extends his hand to Spock, who accepts it and comes gracefully into his waiting arms. They move smoothly onto the dance floor, making no attempt to hide their obviously intense feelings for each other. Kirk sees Uhura and winks, then turns back to his only love, closing out the rest of the world.

This is a wonderful read. It takes you through all the emotions of a probable breakup and then leaves you with the warm and comfortable feeling that you imagined the whole thing. Moral: never listen to gossip.

2006

End of mission from Uhura's viewpoint. The affair between Kirk and Spock seems to have broken off, and Uhura finds this terribly disturbing - to her their relationship has been an icon of the possibility of true love, which she has been unable to find. Great writing, more compelling than the situation would indicate. Wonderful insights into ship life and good background on Uhura and her own failed love affair. Best bit, though, may be the ship-only memorial service as the crew bid farewell to the 57 who died on the mission.

2008

Here is a stunning example of this author‘s eloquence, her ability to turn even the smallest incident or occurrence into a story of memorable proportions. Forgive me if I‘ve reviewed this before – I can‘t imagine that I have not done so, because this account of Uhura‘s observations at the end of the five year mission is unforgettable. She‘s fallen victim to ship‘s gossip, at first denouncing a rumor that Spock and Kirk have broken up, and then slowly but irrevocably falling prey to its poison. In every action they take, she sees trouble, loneliness and pain that reflects her own as she remembers what she‘s given up for Starfleet. It is the final page of this remarkable story that will live with you forever when you read it. And you may never listen to gossip again.