Those Lacking Spines
| Fanfiction | |
|---|---|
| Title: | Those Lacking Spines |
| Author(s): | Gexegee of Organization VI |
| Date(s): | 20 April 2006 - 18 September 2008 |
| Length: | 105586 words, 13 chapters |
| Genre(s): | Parody |
| Fandom(s): | Kingdom Hearts |
| Relationship(s): | |
| External Links: | FanFiction.Net Archive of Our Own |
 Cover art by Oriana132 (2010) | |
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Those Lacking Spines is a Kingdom Hearts fan fiction parody written by Gexegee of Organization VI.
It is, at once, a parody of popular trends in Kingdom Hearts fan fiction and general fan fiction circulating throughout the 2005-2008 era (following the release of Kingdom Hearts II), and—in years since—itself a time capsule of those trends.
Blurb
Immune to a suspicious parasite by merit of their manly looks, Xaldin, Vexen and Lexaeus set out on a journey to save the rest of Organization XIII from the biggest nightmare of all: stupid fanfiction.
Background
Story
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
AGED HUMOR/CONTENT WARNING:
So, back in the day, there was a trend of writing gritty realistic AUs where Axel was a drug junkie, so as to explain his skinny figure. Aku-chan is a pointed swipe at this particular trend. Thus, there's some reference to drug abuse and addiction surrounding him.
Chapter 3
In retrospect, I make quite a few jabs at popular shipping trends of the KH fandom circa 2006 in this fic. I'd definitely be accused of "ship-bashing" if I published this today, so I'mma go ahead and get on the record: I don't ship AkuRoku (and I definitely didn't back in the day, hence the jokes here.) But man, it's fanfic. Write and ship whatever the Hell you want.
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Development, narrative choices and inspiration
PRETENTIOUS WEEPY AUTHOR'S NOTE:When I set out to write Those Lacking Spines in 2006, I was a sophomore in college who spent my days in the wilds of LJ, thirsty for content and eager to sneer at the proliferation of garbage plots and characterization coming out of my fandoms. I very specifically set out to troll, taking swipes at popular trends and bad interpretations that I specifically hated.
Within about a chapter and a half, though, when I realized that I managed to make something people liked while angrily smashing my hands into the keyboard, I lightened up. With the encouragement of my friends, TLS became something more like a cautionary tale; a silly celebration of fandom and fanfic that showed how badly things could go wrong, while encouraging aspiring writers to try their best to improve.
It's been ten years since I published the final chapter of TLS, and in that time it's gotten more attention than I ever could have imagined. There's fanart, cosplay, dramatic readings, even a freakin' TV Tropes page, and all of it blows my mind. I couldn't be more flattered or grateful for all the wonderful responses to my silly little story. Thank you to everyone who took the time to read it, leave reviews, or put hard work into fan-things for it. You are all amazing!
Also in the ten years since, there's been at least 4 new KH games, wild twists and turns in the lore, and tons of "canon" information in TLS is now inaccurate (most notably, Nobodies DO have hearts, and Ienzo is actually, literally 8 years old. There's some crow for me to chew on.) I honestly have not kept up with KH canon at all past KH2, and this is a parody anyway, so all of this information is intact in the story as originally written, and I'm aware it's incorrect (and thank you in advance for not leaving me 12 reviews to point this out.)
ALSO in the ten years since, the internet and fandom's conception of "humor" has changed quite a bit. Though for the most part I avoided gross or problematic humor even back in the day, some of the jokes in the fic might have aged poorly or now come off as meaner or nastier than they used to. I did remove one or two exchanges that I thought were particularly egregious. They weren't funny, and you won't miss them. Other than that, please keep in mind that I wrote this 10 years ago, and it was very much a different time and fandom environment. I threw some author's notes at the beginning of chapters where I think things might need a warning, and a few to explain specific "moment in time" references for certain jokes.
Otherwise, this is it, kids. The original fic in its entirety (apart from aforementioned minor cuts and some grammatical fiddling.) Please enjoy reading it in a fancy new font on AO3's fancy new interface. Thanks for all the love over the years, and I'm happy to have made you laugh. Or smile. Or roll your eyes, I'll take that too.
- Gexegee (of Organization VI)