The Black Box
| Zine | |
|---|---|
| Title: | The Black Box |
| Publisher: | Blue Jay Press (1982), then Crevichon Press, later agented/distributed through Bill Hupe (1992) |
| Editor: | |
| Author(s): | Sue aka The Android |
| Cover Artist(s): | |
| Illustrator(s): | |
| Date(s): | first edition November 1982; 1992 |
| Medium: | |
| Size: | |
| Genre: | |
| Fandom: | multimedia |
| Language: | English |
| External Links: | |
| Click here for related articles on Fanlore. | |
The Black Box is slash multifandom crossover story by Sue aka The Android.
The story incorporates a lot of fannish meta and some RPF. From the online version:
The ultimate crossover; a legend in its own lunchtime! This is definitely a case of 'you had to be there'; a madcap mélange of images from fandom as it was in the early Eighties, long before slash dared to Speak Its Name. [1]
The print version was first published in the U.K. in 1982, in two parts (part 1: chapters 1-16, part 2: chapters 17-30), then later in one 130-page volume.
The story was also later posted online.
The Story Online
The chapter summaries are from Welcome to the Android's Dungeon.
"In which the story starts ... and starts to get strange ... and starts to get really, really strange ...CHAPTER ONE: Catford Nick and Strange Developments. In Which, With The Minimum Of Travail, We Introduce The Plot And Some Of The Characters. You Have Been Warned."
"Vampire-hunting in the streets of a well-known seaside resort; the arrival of the knickers-outside-their-tights boys; unprecedented revelations about a certain Super hero ...CHAPTER THE FOURTH OF JULY: Oh Say Can You See Time. In Which We Visit A Con Hotel In The Middle Of The Night, And Learn Why Vila Is Blushing. P*L*U*S CHAPTER FIVE: Another Really Gorgeous Yank. In Which The Plot Begins To Manifest The First Signs Of Getting Out Of Hand. Whoopee!"
"Capture of a female vampire, the famous Mini scene, aftermath of a fannish party, a picnic of Hungarian hot dogs - and the arrival of characters from the Cloniverse... SCENE: A hotel garden at 3 a.m. Phil Strong and Del Tarrant are shivering in the hydrangeas wondering what on Earth to talk about. Willie Caine, at a respectful distance, keeps them under observation, unaware that he himself is being watched ... by a huge BAT. CHAPTER EIGHT: Oi Vay Iz Mir. In Which The Man Who Didn't Want To Join The Enterprise Doesn't Get To Go Home."
"Avon is questioned by the Sheriff, two rhyming police officers turn up and the Fonz ... and the California Highway Patrol ... [NB: If you're wondering what happened to Chapter 11 you should (a) read Chapter 12 and (b) get out more.]...CHAPTER TWELVE: Mills and Boon, eat your heart out! In Which I Explain, You Scream, And We Are All Committed."
"The identity of the impostor on the Empathy coach is revealed, Bodie's wardrobe is open for public introspection, and Vila and Klinger succeed in breaking the time loop. Or something like that. I think....CHAPTER FIFTEEN: Who was that Unmasked Man? In Which: We Made An Expedition. We Met A Host And Quelled It. We Forced A Strong Position. And Killed The Men Who Held It."
"We find Han Solo in command of the Enterprise, Avon finally meets Paul Darrow, Carol and Meekie get involved, the Darrowby vets examine a comatose Wookiee - and Siegfried discovers his brother's strange secret. His other strange secret... In Which The Love That In Less Enlightened Times Did Not Dare To Speak Its Name Is Made Compulsory. Readers who have survived thusfar (and there are more of you than you might suppose, gentlebeings) may be wondering a) why a supposed Star Trek fan has so long neglected that noble series and b) where John Lodge has got to. Well, on condition that you do not tell Kojak (who is, as you may recall, interrogating Smith and Jones and a certain Kerr Avon about his disappearance and was, when we left him as long ago as Chapter Fifteen, In For A Shock) we will do our best to reveal what is going on."
"An engagement is announced, Dan Archer tries to have Walter Gabriel put to sleep, and Neil Burnside abandons a promising musical career in order to lust Dick Grayson. Holy Emerald Crusader, folks, just what is going on?... TWENTY-ONE: Enough Of This Foolishness. In Which Terence Wishes, And Later Wishes He Hadn't..."
"A great miracle is wrought upon the Earth, incest is proved to be relatively boring, Agent Ellicott has an idea about the Osmonds and certain persons exact a terrifying revenge upon certain other persons. Just more of the same, really."
"Stuartsky is faced with the consequences of her actions (and about time, too, you are probably thinking); Vastarnyi meets his Maker; things go from bad to worse and the author finally pulls the plug on the whole shebang. Phew!"
Some Descriptions
From the online version, header to chapter 12:
The Black Box is a serious work of great literary merit. Already rivalling in length and narrative style the classic masterpiece 'WAR AND PEACE' by Arthur Makewater Tolstoy and outselling Dickens' 'I WAS A WEREWOLF FOR THE F.B.I.', The Black Box is well on the road to becoming the most outstanding fictionalised documentary of our time. It is packed with acute social comment, tender romance, drama, wit, colour and other rubbish. The author is quite naturally a paragon of all the virtues, most particularly modesty. 'Modest to the core' as she was once described by a fan.
THE STORY SO FAR: The Black Box was found to be in the possession of a mysterious man named Magister, who was arrested in Catford in late summer 1980. He disappeared, and shortly after this so did a replica of the Black Box constructed by Phil Strong. In an attempt to locate Magister, Phil Strong and Nick Lewis took the original Black Box and using its unique Time-And-Relative-Dimensions-In-Space facility travelled to Torquay, where they became involved in a vampire hunt and discovered the true nature of the temporal distortions caused by the theft of the replica box. A hotel in Torquay, Fawlty Towers, became the focussing-point for several random universes, which were allowed to overlap simply because the Black Box was not available to fulfil its regular task; that of separating these confusing dimensions and time-lines. The unseen result of this was that a large number of characters who had so far not had a place in the story of the Black Box held a protest meeting so violent that one man was drowned. After this extraordinary occurrence, and presumably linked to it in some way, Chapter Eleven was kidnapped, and remains missing as we write this. Anyone knowing its whereabouts is requested to communicate with the author or the nearest police officer. Meanwhile, we will attempt to continue without it. [2]
From Crevichon Press:
What can we say about The Black Box' that hasn't been said already? It's a manic 100+page saga of slash-fiction and time-travel. If you ever wanted to know how many people you can squeeze into a Viper fighter, what Peter Tork looks like in drag, or what BJ Hunnicutt might say to a Wookiee, this is the zine for you!
From Media Monitor:
Covering dozens of fandoms, this British novel chronicles when British fans actually meet dozens of media characters.
From Bill Hupe's catalog:
What is the secret of the black box? Who is the strange man Smith and Jones meet in chapter 3? Who does Vila see necking in the corridor? Just what were Starsky and Hutch doing on the beach anyway? These are just a few of the questions posed at the beginning of this wild and convoluted romp through endless crossovers.
From an ebay seller in 2012:
THE BLACK BOX, was published by Crevichon Press in 1992 in the UK (authorized reprint by Bill Hupe) and is 130 pages long. This is a thirty chapter novel involving fandoms from the 1980’s and how the different characters act and meet. Very amusingly done. Some of the shows depicted are: Starsky and Hutch; Alias Smith & Jones; Blake’s 7; Fawlty Towers and more.
From an ebay seller in 2021:
This story is adult in nature, where characters have a homosexual relationship. You must be at least 18 years old to buy this fanzine. Nor are you to take the story too seriously. This is a story by Sue Jenkins with lots of help by her friends that wanders all over fandoms.... A crazy romp.