'Noids n 'Droids

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Title: 'Noids n 'Droids
Publisher: Fifty-Percent-Offset-Gweetna Press
Editor(s): Cathy Ford (Cayte Haase-Ford)
Date(s): 1981-1985
Medium: print
Fandom: Star Wars, multi-media
Language: English
External Links:
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a 1983 flyer printed in Imperium #1

'Noids n 'Droids is a gen zine of fiction, poetry, art, and articles.

The first four issues were multimedia (mainly Star Wars and Star Trek: TOS) and original science fiction. The last issue was all media, as the editors steered all of the science fiction to their sister zine, which was titled Zine.

Issue 1

'Noids n 'Droids 1 was published in December 1981 and has 126 pages. Star Wars, Star Trek and original science fiction.

The zine was originally offset. A later edition has two handwritten pages with additions, corrections to art credits, small ads, and some addresses. The editor begins with "Thanks to the miracle of photocopy, the editor can now review the material being copied and slyly insert this small addendum..."

front cover of issue #1
  • It Was Good to See You Again by Ambassador Dlanor (poem) (6)
  • Just Another Ion Storm by Cayte Haast-Ford (Star Trek/Star Wars) (From the zine: "HORSEBACK WRITERS: We are looking for people who share our interests - a love of horses and writing. The plot for "Just Another Ion Storm" was done completely on horseback! Drop us a line, we want to get an organization going, (Please S.A.S.E.)") (7)
  • The Dreamer by Laura E. Bender (original sf) (19)
  • Graffiti Page (21)
  • Well, Well by A. J. Zabes (original sf) (21)
  • After All These Years by Jean Coleman and Cayte Haast-Ford (Star Wars-the Daras Crescenda Story) (23)
  • Laser For Lovers by Cayte Haast-Ford (article: "While most of the time the editors of this zine are irreverent and often bawdy we do settle down occasionally to deal v/ith subjects which, while never mundane, are grounded, at least in fact. Proper science fiction solves a problem, at least according to the experts. To write proper science fic tion one needs to have scientific knowledge which can be transconceptualized. We endeavor, therefore, to include a segment of "science fact" in each edition of 'Noids' N "Droids' for those who are lovers not technicians. Computer whizzies, fiber optic enthusiasts and those who brush with fusion can skip this section. As writers we are interested in character and plot but can appreciate the need for a familiarization with technology when attempting to provide an environment for a science fiction story, So hangs the tale and for our first effort we present: Lasers for Lovers.") (35)
  • Tower O'Babble by Kiel Stuart (Star Trek parody) (39 - will illo on 38)
  • Aquilae (part 1) by Tim Eldred (Star Wars comic book) (51)
  • Space Food ('recipes') (64 & 126)
  • The Space Corps Scandals (introduction and character bios for original sf, "an adult space opera") (65)
  • Flying High by Cayte Haast-Ford (the Space Corps Scandals) (66)
  • crossword puzzle answers from Ee-Miniar #4 (84)
  • Trick or Treat Around the Christmas Tree by Cassie Marie (Star Trek) (85)
  • Maybe Tomorrow by Ambassador Dlanor (poem) (92)
  • The Wizards of Distance by Keith Huggett (original fantasy) (93)
  • untitled poem by Jennifer Bender (poem) (104)
  • Planetside With Scotty by Cayte Haast-Ford (Star Trek) (105)
  • Cocoon by Laura E. Bender (poem) (124)
  • art credits: Caro Hedge, Tim Eldred, R. L. Rouse, Jean Coleman (including laid in centerfold), Jennifer & Laura E. Bender, Cayte Haast-Ford

Issue 2

'Noids n 'Droids 2 was published in May 1982 and has 159 pages. Star Wars, Star Trek and original science fiction.

From the editorial:
We are looking forward to contributions and letters of comment. As indicated we are of the mixed media (mongrelized?) variety, of fanzine. To simplify things we are now labeling Star Trek and Star Wars stories for the convenience of those "flipping through"Any stories not so labeled (unless its real obvious like Tim's M-2 page SW comic strip) are original material. All of us here at ole "Gweetna" enjoy putting out this 'zine and enjoy communicating with fans, particularly at conventions. For your information we take an occasional dip into the "R" range, but most material is "PG". In addition, the literary efforts are not too heavy or profound, just fun. However, if some thing deeply introspective should come our way, we will give it consideration.
cover of issue #2
  • Just in Case by Ambassador Dlanor (poem) (7)
  • Who Am I? by Jennifer Bender (poetry/riddles) (9)
  • Smuggling Life by Jean Coleman (filksong to the tune of "Double Life" by The Cars) (10)
  • Choice of Two Loves by Jennifer Bender (poem) (12)
  • Sound Reasoning by A. J. Zabes (original sf) (13)
  • The Crescendas (background information on the Star Wars - the Daras Crescendas Story) (17)
  • War Was Declared by Ambassador Dlanor (poem) (18)
  • Hello, Stranger by Jean Coleman (Star Wars-the Daras Crescenda Story) (19)
  • Birth of a Comic Strip by Tim Eldred (article about how Eldred creates his fanworks) (27)
  • Aquilare (part 2) by Tim Eldred (Star Wars comic book) (33 & 99)
  • The Space Corps Scandals (more character bios) (47)
  • Somewhere in Space by Cayte Haast-Ford (the Space Corps Scandals) (55)
  • Autocommunity All by Richard R. Reed (original sf) (69)
  • Sherlock-Spocklock by Jennifer Bender (brain puzzle) (79)(answer: 158)
  • The Naked Truth by Kiel Stuart (Star Trek parody) (81 with illo on 80)
  • Siren Cordrazine by Cayte Haast-Ford (Star Trek) (127)
  • Graffiti Page
  • art: Tim Eldred, Jean Coleman, Kiel Stuart

Issue 3

'Noids n 'Droids 3 was published in January 1983 and contains 142 pages.

front cover of issue #3

The art is by Tim Eldred, Kiel Stuart, and Jean Coleman.

The editor wrote:
DONATE BLOOD. Send us some sort of proof [of your blood donation] and we will send you a free copy of 'Noids 'N "Droids #4 to the first five donors. It's the HEINLEIN TRADITION!

NOTE: The comic by Eldred is broken into three pieces in this zine, and therefore takes up a LOT more room than what the table of contents imply.

  • Raiders Cartoon by Tim Eldred (8)
  • Traveling Companions by Jean Coleman (Star Trek) (11)
  • Peace, Peace, Universal Peace, filk to the tune of "Greensleeves," by Ambassador Dlanor (14)
  • Interview with the Ambassador (done "in character" as a Diplomat from the planet Babel) (15)
  • The Ralph Factor by Kiel Stuart (Star Trek) (19)
  • E.T. Cartoon by Tim Eldred (34)
  • The Rescuers, filk to the tune of a song by ABBA, by Jean Coleman (35)
  • The Winning Hand?, vignette by Jennifer Bender (Star Trek) (37)
  • Today, poem by Ambassador Dlanor (38)
  • Through a Child's Eyes by Tim Eldred (Star Wars) (39, continued page 75, and on 118)
  • Joy in Peace Time, poem by Ambassador Dlanor (56)
  • Graffiti Page (57)
  • Alien Cartoon by Tim Eldred (Alien) (58)
  • Swordplay by Cayte Haast-Ford (Star Trek) (59)
  • Candor Humanum by Janet Stanage ("This poem was written on January 12, 1981 at 12:31 am after the author watched "Squire of Gothos.") (75)
  • The Citizens are Disappearing by Ralph Roberts (93)
  • Too Many Days, poem by Ambassador Dlanor (104)
  • Crossword by Laura Bender (105)
  • Night Fighter by John R. Reed/Richard J. Reed (109)
  • Answers to the Crossword (117)
  • E.T. Cartoon by Tim Eldred (134)

Issue 4

'Noids n 'Droids 4 was published in May 1983 and has 141 pages. Star Wars, Star Trek, Blake's 7, and original science fiction.


"This issue of NND includes our new emphasis on SW and media fanfic."

  • The Long Lost Time by Jean Coleman, art by Tim Eldred (from the Crescenda Files, when Dar disappeared on Dheranl one rainy night, Han knew she was gone for good... or was she?) (Star Wars)
  • There Will Always Be an England, So Why are We Here? by Cayte Haast-Ford (a play is one of the classic forms of writing, but when it involves the Blake's 7 gang, anything can happen.)
  • Captains of the Fantastic by Tim Eldred (an original comic strip, for superhero fans everywhere)
  • other fiction, art and more by A.J. Zabes, Laura Bender, Ralph Roberts, Kiel Stuart, Jenny Bender and others

Issue 5

'Noids n 'Droids 5 was published in May 1984 and contains 100 pages. This issue contains only media content, as the science fiction and fantasy was published in Zine.

cover of issue #5
  • Life, the Universe and Han Solo by Jim M. Allen (Star Wars/Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy; sequel to Just Another Ion Storm in #1) (5)
  • Kahz by Janet Stanage (Star Trek - ancient Klingon) (15)
  • The Possession by Patricia Lee Johnson (Star Trek) (28)
  • Things We Hate, cartoon by Sandra Williams
  • Feel All My Love,song by Janet Stanage (Star Trek) (40)
  • Mixed Media: Introductory Chapter by Kiel Stuart (Star Trek crossed with St. Elsewhere, Hill Street Blues, etc.) (43)
  • Who is Who? by Cayte Haasrt-Ford (Doctor Who poem) (49)
  • Will a Soul Survive by Tim Eldred (Blade Runner comic book) (51)
  • Mixed Media: Chapter Three by Kiel Stuart (Star Trek crossed with St. Elsewhere, Hill Street Blues, etc.) (81)
  • art: Anne Davenport, Sylvia Stevens , Sandra Williams, Tim Eldred, Jim Emelander, Contessa