Your Friends Are Not Watching the Same Show You Are (And That's Okay)

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Title: Your Friends Are Not Watching the Same Show You Are (And That's Okay)
Creator: Merlin Missy
Date(s): May 2, 2008
Medium:
Fandom: multifandom, Doctor Who, Battlestar Galactica (2003), The Sarah Jane Chronicles, Torchwood, Will and Grace, Stargate Atlantis, many others
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External Links: Your Friends Are Not Watching the Same Show You Are (And That's Okay)
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Your Friends Are Not Watching the Same Show You Are (And That's Okay) is a 2008 essay by Merlin Missy.

"You and your friends may be tuned into the same thing, but there's a good chance you're not seeing the same things. Think of this as the evil clone of the potato salad theory: as it turns out, we’re bringing different things to the picnic after all."

Series

This essay is part of a series called Dr. Merlin's Soapbox.

Some Topics Discussed

From the Essay

Just three weeks ago, when The Sarah Jane Adventures first premiered in the U.S. on SciFi, Dr. Merlin was very excited. Now was the opportunity for her friends to enjoy the adventures of Sarah Jane, Maria, and the rest of the gang. Yet when she went to read the comments from her friends -- horrors! -- the very first reviewer declared it too kiddie and had tuned away within two minutes. No amount of swearing SJA is one of the best new shows out there would convince her. As she wept silently into her cartoon-printed pillowcase (okay, I lie about the tears, but not about the pillow), Dr. Merlin recalled many other times when this had happened: she and her friends watched the same series, but were clearly watching different shows.

This happens quite a lot, really.

The friend who didn't like SJA is also a Battlestar GalacticaBattlestar Galactica (2003)]] fan, specifically one who watches the "Kara and Sam Anders Show." Other friends watch the "Mom and Dad Are Prom King and Queen of the Universe Show" (this would be Dr. Merlin's favorite Battlestar-related series), the "Lee and Kara Perform Sam and Diane Show" (very popular), the "Many Faces of Gaius Baltar's Mental Breakdowns Show," and even the "Billy Keikeya Show" (which has been on hiatus, alas). One friend recently admitted to watching the "Chief and Cally Show," although that series has also gone on permanent hiatus. During the Farscape days, one friend watched the "Aeryn Sun Rocks Show," and has not yet seen the episodes in which Claudia Black did not appear. Similarly, Dr. Merlin did not watch Star Trek: Voyager, but instead an infrequent but bubbly series called the "Kes Is As Cute As a Button Show" which sadly ended after three seasons. Visiting with fannish friends later, she was witness to the birth of the "Tom and B'Elanna Channel" via VHS-to-VHS recording, and found out firsthand just how much someone can literally be watching her very own personally-designed series.

It's not always a character or even a 'ship, though 'ships are quite often the center of a series for fans. Sometimes it's a theme. One friend noticed an ugly pattern in new school Whoniverse, and now watches the "How Did Rusty Screw Up the Racial Subtext This Time? Show." She's not alone. Other friends, and Dr. Merlin herself, have been forced to watch the "No, Seriously, Did You Learn Your Gender Studies in the Boys' Lockeroom? Show" because ignoring it was too hard. Then of course there are the "Your Grasp of Basic Science Makes the Baby Newton Cry Show" and the "Explosions Show," which is a favorite of Mr. Merlin's, no matter what channel it's on, the characters or cast -- if it goes BOOM, he's there. Many networks bank on the continued popularity of the "Scantily-Dressed Women Show," and Forever Knight in fact was launched on CBS with the command that there should be a corpse in lingerie to begin each episode. The "Witty Banter Show" has been declining in popularity lately, but since Dollhouse is coming soon with Joss Whedon at the helm, it's sure to see a recovery.

When your friend outs herself as a Harmonian, don't mentally drop her down a well or ban her from your blog. Try seeing the books from her point of view, even if you think she and Rowling are both interrogating the text from the wrong perspective. You might find something you didn't see last time.

As sure as there are stars in the sky there are other fans who are just as giddy about the show you're watching as you are. Not just Smallville, but the "Chloe Sullivan Rocks the Known Universe Show." Not just Torchwood, but the "Do Not F@&$ With the Teaboy Show." Fans who aren't reading Harry Potter, but instead Luna Lovegood and the Crumple-Horned Snorkack. Fans who watch the Hellboy movies for Abe Sapien. Fans like you. They're out there, wanting to squee about their own private versions of canon with you, and the very best part is that you don't have to lose or replace your current friends to find them. You'll just meet even more.

Fan Comments

[babs]:Just like my friends who were watching the Kaylee and Simon show while I was ALL about Captain Hotpants. *nod* I hear ya!

Leva Cygnet: I'm actually reminded of the Supernatural fans who complain that the show doesn't have enough Sam or enough Dean -- that it's favoring one boy over the other. And it's not their favorite boy. (Me, I think they're both hot. They can show either one and I'm happy. But I digress. And I also know Missy's opinion in general of SPN, so I'll stop now. :P)

[Joe Bua]: Some people are indeed tuning in to the show to see Catherine Tate as Donna. Sure, she doesn't look as good running as the other companions (both of whom I loved in the role and will love again soon when they return) but I love the Donna story arc so far and the scene in Planet of the Ood when the Doctor lets her hear their song? It's amazing. Catherine Tate may not be able to run her ass off but she can certainly act her ass off. I guess in response to the negative notices on her I could just ask if you "think I'm bovvered."

[Laura]: Great article :) It explains my opinion perfectly - sometimes I watch shows for the shipping (Torchwood, to some extent), others I don't (Supernatural, Doctor Who). Plus? You referenced Sports Night (Dan and Casey ARE soulmates, why doesn't everyone see that?!). You win!

[Anoel]: Great article! Particularly true about The Rose Tyler Show which explains so much. I don't always agree with reading something you hate vehemently (I'm not reading any Jack/Gwen love posts soon) but understanding the difference in what you're watching makes knowing it's out there a much more zen experience.

A.j.: *SQUEALS and claps like a wee child* THE BILLY KEIKEYA SHOW IS THE BEST SHOW EVER. I sad face at its extended haitus on a regular basis. And I thank you from the bottom of my heart for its mention. <3

[jennielf]: YAY. This is one of the many reasons why I am a Merlin Missy fangirl. :) You are made of win and deserve lots of cookies and the internet. (Sadly, I too have have had several crushes on blue women who are awesome....*sigh* yeah....)

[feather]: So true! How often have my friends and I said about other fans, "They're clearly watching a different show!" Mostly about the people who apparently watch The John/Teyla Show, while I've only ever seen the John/Elizabeth show. (I try to ignore the John and Rodney show as much as possible...) Great article!

[Faye]: Ahhh, I wondered why I was watching the "Torchwood Is Doing Time Travel Wrong" show while everyone else was watching "Look Hot Boysex." Not that I didn't tune into "Look Hot Boysex", it's just that TIDTTW kept cutting into my damn station.

[okelay]: I've been watching "The Doctor & Rose show" since the beginning of the new series. I also love "The Tenth Doctor show", "The Rose Tyler show" and even "The Sally Sparrow show",short-lived as it was. I tried watching "The Martha Jones show" and it just wasn't for me. So I basically just ignore it. I've really enjoyed "The Donna Noble show" so far, especially since it's been crossing with "The Rose Tyler Show" I've never watched "The John and Rodney show" or the "Jack and Ianto show" for me, it's always been "The John and Elizabeth show" and "The Tosh and Owen show" and of course, Moonlight is really "The Let's See How Cheesy They Get This Week show."

[unknown user]: "The Donna Noble Show" is just a great show. Really, Doctor who?

[Fondy]: For me, the frustration with different shows being watched generally occurs when the 'other' shows are the ones that get more fanfic than MY show. ;p As an (obscure) example: "Last of the Mohicans." I want to read about the "Cora and Hawkeye Show," but most fanfic is totally about the "Uncas and Alice Show." Unfair! ;p

[Rosalita]: This explains why "Moonlight" fandom is so frustrating for me. I'm watching the "Mick and Josef Show" and everyone else is watching the "Mick and Beth Show." Also, I really, really miss the "Daniel Jackson Show" and its spinoff the "Jack and Daniel Show."

[Henry J.]: Am I the only one who couldn't understand a single sentence in the first few paragraphs?
[Merlin Missy]: Perhaps you are on the wrong website?

[Aine]: Thanks for the article. One of my friendships already broke off because I watch the "Ten and Rose Show" and my friend keeps watching "Doctor Who". She just doesn't know what she's missing. ;-)

Icarus: Absolutely. I'm watching "Stargate Atlantis: John and Rodney Show." My boyfriend on the other hand watches the "Stargate Atlantis: Ludicrous Military Incompetence Show."

[Melissa]: Yep, watching the Chloe Sullivan Rocks the Universe show with a healthy side of OMG She's Really Lois Lane. I adored the Daniel/Vala show and can't seem to figure out why so many were not in favor of it. I suspect it was misplaced anger over the cancelation of the Jack and Daniel show. Me and Dr. Who go back pretty far, so I've been watching I LOVE THIS SHOW -- NOSTOLGIA!!! with no reservations. BSG has become It Hurts So Good. You've hit upon a hot topic. Very insighful and entertaining.

[Taran]: I hope "The Doctor/Master Show" comes back. It was great in the '70s and the pilot for the new series was awfully good.

[Carys]: *laughs* This is fabulous! I experience this all the time with my best friend, because whatever show we're watching at the time, she ships het and I relentlessly slash. I've also got a friend who watches The Doctor And Rose Show, while I'm either watching The Doctor/Master Show or The Doctor/Jack Show or The Doctor Is Asexual Damnit Show. Which is perfectly fine. :)

[psycicflower]: This is brilliant and so very true. I only had someone on my blog a few weeks ago who clearly watched the 'Rose is the Best Companion Ever and the Best Person Ever in Exsistence and I Don't Care What You Say Show' For Torchwood I watch the 'Jack and Ianto Show', which thankfully so far people I know watch, and the 'Fill in Your Own Plot Holes/Background Show', lots of fun, especially with the addition of website stuff and fanfic. Aside from watching Doctor Who as 'Doctor Who' I also watch it as the 'The Doctor Show' 'Figure Out Your Own Canon Show' 'How Does That Make Any Sense as an Explanation Show' and 'What Has RTD Done Now/How Has He Screwed Up This Time Show' I'm holding out hope for a 'Jack, Ianto and The Doctor Show'

[Rainbow]: I love the Donna Noble Show so far. I also happen to be a big fan of the Starbuck, Apollo and Boomer Are All Guys, Damnit Show, which I imagine many fans of the Kara and Lee Show have never seen.
[Eugenia]: Sign me up as another fan of the "Starbuck, Apollo and Boomer Are All Guys, Damnit" show (as well as the "Cain is also a Guy, Damnit" show). The show currently running on Sci-Fi is the "How Will Ronnie and Dave BS Their Way Out of This Trainwreck?" Show.

[Evelyn]: I was introduced to SGA as "The John/Rodney (theyaresomarried) Show", but I also sometimes see "The Rodney and Radek Show" (which isn't necessarily the Rodney/Radek show, though I am not opposed to it breaking out) and am a huge fan of "The Carson Beckett Show". I also maintain that true canon is "The Three Lovers Show" (John/Rodney/Teyla/Ronon, read the fic) I also watch the "Jack and Whoever He Can Get His Hands On" Show in addition to being a huge fangirl of the "Jack and Ianto Show". Occasionally my viewing gets interrupted by the "Fanfic isn't Canon" show, which is never fun

[Lilah]: OMG, this is so true. I watch the Janto, Fraser/RayK, McShep, McDean, and Hilson shows. I love The Doctor/Master Show, The Ten is Awesome Show, The I Miss Nine Show, The NineJackRose Show, The Donna Noble Show. The 'BJ/Hawkeye so love Each other' Show. The Mylar, Syter, 'Bring Claude Back' and Petrillicest shows. The 'Cylons are hot'& 'WHERE THE HELL IS LEOBEN?' show. Honestly, I can't understand how people really don't see what I see, and I get worked up! But I'm going to try to remember 'there's others like me'.

[IsaacSaphire]: This explains a lot about what's going on with some of my f-list in the Supernatural fandom, mostly with regards to whether or not Castiel exists or Sam exists (No one seems to be able to see that they are both in there). More seriously, a massive swath of the Supernatural fandom seems determined that it is watching a racist, misogynistic, homophobic show, despite any evidence to the contrary. (and if it really is those things, why are they still watching?) I've concluded that I'm not going to even bother trying not to have elements that might look racist, misogynistic, or homophobic in my original works, because people seem determined to see it whether it's there or not.
[Merlin Missy]: Ah, I see what the problem is. You're reading the wrong essay. Here you go: How to Be a Fandom Jerk in Just a Few Easy Steps.

[Alex]: It stops becoming fun when the people who say it's "_____"s show tries to force it on the fandom in general or get nasty when canon increasingly does not support them AT ALL. EX : Those who watch the "Chloe rocks/Chloe is the real Lois" show have become tiresome to Smallville shippers/non-shippers alike. It was delusion to begin with but when it becomes nasty onto RL people, reality needs to be faced. It's laughable of course because canon is so far from that and those repeat that mantra don't even know who Lois is in all her incarnations. Pretty much why comics!Lois fans laugh at that fan theory...myself being one. I would live and let live if those theorists weren't trying to force others into viewing something that DID NOT EXIST.

References

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