This Simple Feeling (Star Trek: TOS story)

K/S Fanfiction
Title:	This Simple Feeling
Author(s):	Beverly Sutherland
Date(s):	1983
Length:
Genre:	slash
Fandom:	Star Trek: The Original Series
External Links:
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This Simple Feeling is a Kirk/Spock story by Beverly Sutherland. The art is by Nan Lewis.

It has a sequel: Resting Place in Another K/S Zine.

It was published in Nome #6 and was nominated for a 1984 K/Star Award.

This was one of the stories that was to have appeared in "Best of Nome" #1.

Summary

"After VʼGer, Spock must come to terms with his feelings for Kirk."

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  art by Nan Lewis -- "This picture perfectly illustrates the story it accompanies: This Simple Feeling. There is a beautiful scene in which Kirk tries to avoid waking Spock (who is recuperating from the V-ger meld in Kirk's cabin due to his own being unavailable). Kirk is naked, and in the drawing his back is to Spock as he reaches into his suitcase. The uncertainty he feels at their situation is clearly etched on his face. Behind him, Spock has wakened and watches intently. The drawing is very softly done in dots, which matches the feel of the moment exactly. It makes an already unforgettable moment even more so."

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  art by Nan Lewis -- "Another great illustration for a memorable story, This Simple Feeling. Spock places his hands in the meld position on Kirk's face to convince him of his sincerity. I love the method in which this is drawn, through a series of dots, which creates a soft and dreamy image. Both faces are impeccably accurate, not only to features but to the expressions which so aptly suit the scene. The TMP uniforms befit the story and also contribute a lot to the image itself."

Reactions and Reviews

This Simple Feeling made me remember why I was a K/S fan. Nothing that moves the reader like this should be overlooked. You don‘t want it to end. TSF is the foundation — the beginning of love‘s greatest journey. From the promise of touching hands to the gentle touching of minds, to the fires of Pon Farr a road one should not miss traveling. No matter how many times you‘ve read of The Beginning, no matter how many ways you‘ve witnessed Pon Farr, you‘ve never felt the impact more than you will in these two recountings.

Even the supporting cast, while their appearances are brief, are so on-target that you hear their words and see their concerned expressions as well as you ever did on film. They live and breathe: Scotty, Bones, David, Saavik, Uhura. Uncanny, spiritual, is the only way to describe how Kirk begins to retreat from what everyone else perceives as reality following STII. He is a soul caught between two planes of existence, slipping ever nearer to the distant shore — to Spock. As in 'He was already far away when Saavik turned from him and left the room.' And Saavik thought, 'How fragile are his ties to this existence.' There was one glitch for me. Kind of like finding a pit in your cherry pie. Just as I was being woven into the spell of transcendental love between Kirk and the essence of his departed mate, Kirk decides to 'share' with McCoy and promptly takes him to bed. Sorry, but in my mind‘s eye, the sort of love that crosses the barrier between life and death has no room for a third party. Even seeing McCoy as a bridge between the dead and the living doesn‘t make me buy it. It broke the spell for me, brief as the encounter was.

I enjoyed being witness to David‘s growing awareness of what his father and Spock were to each other. I felt like an insider, knowing an awesome secret when others were still confused.

For any lover of The Motion Picture, for any K/S fan who believes their separation was what brought Kirk and Spock ultimately together, this is the perfect expression of those feelings.

"Out there. Thataway", Kirk commands, sounding very sure of himself and his destiny. In spite of his words, he is very uncertain of his future with Spock. There has simply been no time at all to explore what Spock's startling words in sickbay were meant to convey. Kirk is both hopeful and frightened as he has never been before. As he steps to Spock's station and begins a discussion about their shakedown, the Vulcan suddenly crumples to the deck. Kirk's fear is palpable as he calls for medics and for his trusted friend McCoy. His mind is racing with the possibility that when they seem so close to having a life together once again, he may lose Spock.

Exhaustion is McCoy's diagnosis, leading to extreme relief for both Kirk and the reader. This is h/c at its subtle best. In sickbay Kirk grasps both the Vulcan's hands and refuses to let go, even though there are onlookers. There is an abundance of love shown here, beautifully written.

A most touching and pivotal scene occurs when a freshly showered and naked Kirk goes into his quarters to retrieve some clothing while the Vulcan sleeps. Kirk has given over his bed to Spock as the Vulcan's cabin is cleared of Decker's belongings. Spock wakes and says softly, "Jim. Come here." Oh my. Kirk fears he is imagining what he hears and says something about getting dressed first. Spock replies, "No. Come to me now. As you are." The most loving and memorable reunion follows. Many things are admitted: Kirk's resentment of being left alone, their deep attraction for each other. Understanding. Forgiveness. Acceptance. If you believe they were never lovers in the series, if you believe they came together after V'Ger, you will never read a more plausible and fulfilling explanation than this.