The Triangular Whatsits

Zine
Title:	The Triangular Whatstis
Publisher:
Editor(s):	Lee Falcon
Date(s):	December 1989
Series?:
Medium:	print
Size:
Genre:
Fandom:	War of the Worlds
Language:	English
External Links:
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cover by Colleen Winters

submission request, printed in The Blackwood Project #2

The Triangular Whatsits is a gen War of the Worlds 104-page anthology published in 1989. Cover art is by Colleen Winters; interior art is by Colleen Winters, Leah Deyneka, Elisa Deyneka, Lee Falcon, and Lana Merkel.

There was to be a second issue of "The Triangular Whatsits" but it became a "combined zine with Advocate Angst."

The zine's disclaimer: " "The Triangular Whatsits" is a amateur, non-profit publication done by and for the fans of War of the Worlds, as created by Sam and Greg Strangis. All rights to the contributed material revert back to the artists and writers upon publication. As to the rest of the standard disclaimer, '*pfft!*' on Paramount."

Regarding some promised content: "Admission of guilt: You'll notice that there's no story on the Colonel's revenge for Blackwood's "cute knees" remark as mentioned in an early flyer. It just never got finished..."

Submission Requests

A submission request excerpt: "Special section on 'missing scenes and tags we'd like to see.' (Imagine Blackwood getting stuck in one of his Yoga positions... or ... Paul takes revenge on Harrison for the 'nice knees' remark -- this one has already been done!) Stories of all lengths welcome. Planned contribution deadline is October 31, 1988 (heh!). Looking for action/adventure stories, along the line of the series, but without the gore. Go for character development. Suspense, etc."

Another submission request excerpt: "TRIANGULAR WHATSITS, a new WAR OF THE WORLDS zine, is eagerly seeking contributions of stories, artwork, cartoons, pepperoni pizzas, etc."

Contents

• A Wild Goose Named Harrison by J.C. Brennan (Harrison's off chasing aliens on his own, much to Ironhorse's horror.) (3)
• Definitions, poem by Lana Merkel (10)
• MediaWest*Con 1989 WOW Episode Guide by Dickenson, Falcon, Horvath and Rancourt--Humorous descriptions of the first season. (11)
• Missing Scenes and Tags We'd Like To See
  • And I Heard Angels...Harrison by Trish D'Orazio (12)
  • And I Heard Angels...Ironhorse by Anne McDonnell (17)
  • Tag for "The Second Seal" by Rowena Warner (23)
  • Let's Be Real by Tulife M. Ortal (32)
  • Two-Edged Sword, an alternate ending of "Angel of Death" by Connie Faddis (33)
• Tactics of Good Nutrition by Jo Lynn Horvath (It's been a very rough time for the team, and tempers finally come to a boil, over breakfast.) (39)
• They Know Not What They Do by Beth Muramoto (The aliens plan to study a human's survival techniques, and Ironhorse is their unlucky subject -- script form). (45)
• Soldiers of the Lord by Trish D'Orazio (A story from Stavrakos' point-of-view.) (85)
• A Study in Self-Sacrifice by Beth Muramoto (96)
• Close Your Eyes, poem by Beth Muramoto (103)
• The Shameless Plug Department (104)
• You Are Receiving This Zine Because (inside back cover)

Inside Sample

• 

  Lana G. Merkel

• 

  Leah and Elisa Deyneka

• 

  Colleen Winters

• 

  You Are Receiving This Zine Because

Reactions and Reviews

This is not a perfect zine -- but it's one of the best, even with a growing 'really good zine" list. The faults are minor, mostly printing and a confusion between "it's" and "its... But considering TW was printed, run and mailed while the editor was on leave from overseas duty in Africa, I'm delighted it was published at all.

As in Dee-Pice, it's variety that keeps things moving -- that and some talented new (to this fandom, anyway) writers. JC Brennan starts off the fiction with a short "Harrison Takes Off — Again" story. The narration is a bit choppy, and POV hops around a bit, but the dialog is right on target, and the plot makes sense.

Four extremely silly people did an episode guide for first season. Example: "The Last Supper" - Ironhorse makes alien sushi." This is funny stuff we're dealing with, Blackwood.

The next fiction, two separate vignettes by Trish D'Orazio and Anne McDonnell, is a very interesting treatment of Harrison "detoxing" from the alien programming in CA. It's one scene, seen first from Harrison's POV, then Iron-horse's. The internal dialog on both of these, especially the Ironhorse segment, is excellent. (There are a few awkward spots, but first-person narration is tough to write.) I particularly liked the rationalizing prior to where the aired scene ended, with Ironhorse folding his arms, back to the door. McDonnell also caught his dry humor perfectly. This duo -- there's no separating the two stories — is one of the best things in the zine.

The mood shifts abruptly in a ridiculous "Second Seal" postscript by Rowena Warner — and the contrast works very well. The basic premise, that the alien crystal would turn Ironhorse into "a bad parody" of Harrison, is absurd, but very funny, and some of the dialog is great. (Harrison, instructing Suzanne on how to take care of a crystal-depressed and weeping Norton: "Hug him or something.") The argument between the crystal-hostile Harrison and crystal-mellow Ironhorse starts to drag, but this is a good light piece, especially placed as it is between two very serious ones.

Connie Faddis didn't like the end of AD and wrote an 'alternate universe" ending for itf explaining where Omega Squad was. I enjoyed this piece, though I disagree with the premise -- I saw Ironhorse as under Q'tara's influence and think he left Omega at the base. As to the actual writing, Faddis has been published professionally and I think it shows, but we've been friends too long for my opinion to be objective. This one's for angst-lovers.

After that grim bit, Jo Horvath brings back the humor. I don't really care for food fights, but there are some great descriptions here: Ironhorse's state after a three-week seige sounds like any random group the last morning of a four-day convention; part of the team sits around the breakfast table "in various stages of decomposition;' and Suzanne's wail, "What did you do to Uncle Hank?" takes the cake... or pie. Colleen Winters, who seems to have become the Clown Princesses of WOW art, has illoed this perfectly. (Her cartoons elsewhere in the zine, and the Ironhorse-with-crystal cover, are to her usual standard. Beth Muramoto's "They Know What They Do" is probably the longest piece in TW, partly due to the format. It concerns the aliens kidnapping Ironhorse, almost by accident, as part of an experiment in observing human behavior. I wish they'd filmed this instead of "Unto Us/ but I wish even more that Beth had developed it in a story format... my own reader's laziness, maybe. A story has more room for introspection. I have a few minor quibbles, such as why Ironhorse took so long to use a gun he acquired, but this would have made a good first season episode. (The title would've been good for second season, too... all of second season.)

Trish D'Orazio's "Soldiers of the Lord" is the best story in TW — it may be the best WOW story I've read yet. Told from the surprising POV of Alexander Stavrakos, "Soldiers" also gives vivid characterizations of the Blackwood Project principals, particularly Ironhorse. The Stavrakos POV is entirely convincing: the immediacy of battle situations, comparisons between Coleman and McCullough, the foster-child's acute isolation and concern for others' opinions, the worry over how he would measure up.... Even the phrasing, the word choice, is completely different from any other character in the universe and turned Stavrakos into a three-dimensional human being. This is how POV works. It's one fine piece of writing, and I hope Trish writes more,

And then, for the finale, TW follows Dee-Pice with a convincing downer. Beth Muramoto has a short, sharp, and (damn it) believable "Kill the Colonel" story. The foreshadowing works, the action works, but... Argh. I hope it doesn't become a tradition for good zines to end with this particular bang.

All things considered, TW is another well-orchestrated zine, with excellent production values. I wish there had been more of it.