Personal Devil
| Fanfiction | |
|---|---|
| Title: | Personal Devil |
| Author(s): | Deanna Gray |
| Date(s): | 2001 |
| Length: | |
| Genre(s): | slash |
| Fandom(s): | Star Trek: TOS |
| Relationship(s): | Kirk/Spock |
| External Links: | |
Click here for related articles on Fanlore. | |
Personal Devil is a Kirk/Spock vignette by Deanna Gray.
It was published in the print zine First Time #52.
Summary
"The Enterprise is granted shoreleave on a starbase commanded by Finnegan, Kirkʼs old nemesis who starts right up where he left off and finally drives Kirk to make a bet he immediately regrets."
Reactions and Reviews
Just before I read this story, I had read another K/S story in which Spock rapes Kirk. Not an ideal read for me. And even though it had a happy ending, I found that I still didn't feel happy or satisfied....Until I started to read Deanna's story.
This is a lovely relationship story, or what I like to think of as a feel good K/S story...
It takes place during a shore leave where Kirk meets up with his old foe Finnegan, the real one. Nothing has changed between them, their rivalry is as strong as it was in their academy days, despite Spock's efforts to keep the situation at bay. But soon things do get out of hand and Kirk finds himself agreeing to a bet with Finnegan that he immediately regrets. A bet that involves Spock.
There is wonderful dialog between K & S, and from Finnegan, too. And a sweet hurt/comfort scene that I love in which Kirk gets drunk and sick to his stomach and Spock takes care of him. He even gives his captain a massage (sigh). But what I love best is that the story reveals that there is nothing the two friends wouldn't do for each other; no sacrifice they wouldn't make. Plus, a lovely first time between the guys that is the icing on the cake to this beautiful story! [1]
A fun story—over the years, Kirk is bedeviled by Finnegan (by the way, I loved his first name of Kevin).They meet again and Finnegan proceeds to push every single one of Kirk's buttons—driving him to compete until finally the stakes involve Spock and sex.
It's a great set-up—unbeknownst to Spock, Kirk bets Spock's "services" for a night—and loses.
Instead of telling Spock, Kirk goes to Finnegan in his place, but Spock finds out! We don't know what's happening that night along with Kirk (nicely done) until Kirk meets Finnegan in the morning.
Finnegan then reveals his true motives all along—he's been on a mission to shake Kirk up—to stop him from being so serious. Well...) don't know about all this, but Finnegan goes on to say that he's really a nice guy and his motives were purely altruistic. Well...I guess.
Finnegan takes on the classic "McCoy-tells-about-love" role and tells Kirk that Spock loves him.
I will not say that I was looking forward to a nice juicy, sexy scene among Kirk, Spock and Finnegan. Moi? Never. I'd sooner read a scene where they vacuum the apartment or something. Well, maybe just a little sexy scene with Finnegan. Okay, okay, so I would have liked a big juicy, sexy scene. But the story goes in a totally different direction, which is fine.
The best part of the story is when Kirk goes to Spock's quarters while Spock is sleeping. His thoughts while he watches Spock are really wonderful.
And the sex! Wow. Check out this fellatio: "The balls in his hand contracted, and Kirk could swear he feel the semen rush from them into the aching cock, finally exploding from the slits and pulsing down his throat. Hot and thick, with an alien flavor he couldn't identify but knew already he loved. As the flow ebbed he sucked slower, until finally it stopped. Spock's body went limp. Gently Kirk released the softening organ, lapping carefully the remaining cum. The Vulcan's cock rested quietly now."
Some descriptions of wonderful differences like the ridges secrete a mucous to ease penetration and the three slits.
Such beautiful thoughts: "He'd loved Spock for a long time, and known almost from the start that they were special together." [2]
This is a story regarding Finnegan, and one reason I liked it is that I hate Finnegan. I have a definite aversion to this character, and I don't mean in a love-to-hate kind of way, either; I'll mute and look elsewhere rather than watch those Finnegan scenes (same with O'Reilly). So there's something to be said for a story that makes me interested anyway.Maybe it's a bit far-fetched to think Finnegan devoted so much concerted effort at the Academy to harassing Kirk so thoroughly in order to push Kirk to be the best he could be-which was far better than Finnegan knew he himself would ever be-but okay, I'll go for it. We learn a good explanation for this past between them causing Kirk always to lose to Finnegan, why Kirk must continually challenge him and then lose to him because he loses his cool.
Kirk dreads running into him at a starbase where the ship is laid over, so Spock accompanies him on leave.
At first I minded the many "had" scenes-what they had done for two days before ever running into Finnegan; then two nights in a row, our learning only afterwards what had gone on between Kirk and Finnegan (in bars, Kirk losing at darts, losing at cards, drinking contests even...but this is okay because the real story is between Kirk and Spock, how wretched Kirk feels when he comes home after these depressing nights.
Then he really blows it, after Finnegan pushes and pushes and pushes him, and Kirk agrees to a bet, to Finnegan getting a night with Spock.
Who wins, and how both Kirk and Spock deal with this, is the nitty-gritty of this story; and we also get a picture of Finnegan as an okay person (I'll grudgingly admit).
The aftermath of it all is satisfying. Especially the sex. Very much so. I love when Kirk wakes Spock up by kissing him...but that's just the beginning of a really, really nice sex scene, with beautiful feeling and sexual response and all of it. (Except personally, I can do without too much explicit anatomical detail, either said by characters or in narrative- especially in the sex scene itself-about number and placement of testicles, slits, mucous membranes, etc.) But the love-words at the end are a sweet ending. [3]
"Personal Devil" by Deanna Gray is about 24 pages long. And I'll have to say that it's the most original story I've read in along while. The main three characters in this story are Spock, Kirk, and Kirk's old nemesis Finnegan who is now Base Commander of the Starbase on Litau where the Enterprise is visiting.The formatting was a problem and sprinkled throughout the story were little 1/4 fractions. This was a little distracting.
The Jim Kirk in this story is a bit unbelievable, but other than that I enjoyed the story and it certainly had a bunch of different twists and turns. I could never predict what was going to happen next. I do recommend the story. [4]
To be completely honest, there is a part of Personal Devil I cannot find words to praise and that is what I find to be a very uncomplimentary portrayal of Kirk's lack of respect for Spock. Involving Finnegan in Kirk's discovery of his love for Spock is a new and clever one, however, my heart simply will not accept that James Kirk would wager with anyone under any circumstances with Spock as the prize. That being said, it was good to see there was a human being inside Finnegan's facade of frivolity and meanness. I have a better opinion of him from this reading. I am still very disappointed in Kirk.Deanna finds an unusual way to allow Kirk and Spock to finally express their feelings, but their love is clearly the driving force in all they do, except for Kirk's one noticeable and unforgivable slip-up.
The love scene—ahh, thank you, Deanna—is tender and slowly executed and very satisfying. Beautifully written and oh, so believable. Now they act toward each other as I feel they should! I guess it took something extreme to get them to admit their feelings and to be able to love each other to such glorious completion. Maybe it was worth it, after all. [5]