No Unicorns

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Bodie/Doyle Fanfiction
Title: No Unicorns
Author(s): Sebastian and HG
Genre: slash
Fandom: The Professionals
External Links: NO UNICORNS by hgdoghouse, Archived version

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No Unicorns is an 18-page Professionals slash Bodie/Doyle story by Sebastian and HG. It is a paper circuit story.

It is a story on The 1985 Hatstand Express Top Ten Lists.


In 2000, two fans Cassie Ingaben and Dagger compiled an index of many of the circuit stories. They also wrote brief summaries:

  • Dagger: Doyle's stuck in hospital recovering and Bodie's off on assignment. They begin writing letters as a way to stay in touch and reveal their true feelings toward each other. (Discovered in a Graveyard)

Reactions and Reviews


It's very difficult to do this kind of story, but the author has successfully carried it off.[1]
Charming. It's very difficult to do this kind of story, but the author has successfully carried it off.[2]


"No Unicorns" is such a romantic little piece, the concept of Bodie and Doyle exchanging little notes after "Discovered in a Graveyard," which soon evolved into love letters is so difference and appealing as a story vehicle. [3]


I can picture Bodie and Doyle writing to each other in this way, sounding each other out. [4]


'No Unicorns' by Sebastian and HG is written as letters exchanged between Doyle (physically hurt in hospital) and Bodie traipsing round as Cowley makes him work. The letters get more and more open. Emotionally very satisfying.[5]


May I suggest another post-DIAG story which I love? It's No Unicorns by Sebastian and HG on the Proslib cd. Bodie has been sent away on assignment while Doyle is in hospital and they start writing letters to each other to pass the time. The letters are just so them, and much has to be read between the lines. I think it's brilliant.[6]
Read it last night -- and hugely enjoyed it. Put that one right near the top of my favorite DiaG stories. Very nice blend of pathos and sly humor -- and, although the story itself is slight, the little insecure dropping of clues as to feeling and intent was very well done. Very realistic. One or both of those writers has actually paid attention to the way people communicate...I think it may be my single favorite DiaG story. It's very clever.

One of the things that interests me most about it is the total lack of conflict between the lads -- because that's really one of my pet peeves in m/m fiction (and fan fiction in particular) -- the lack of any believable, character-based conflict. And, of course, without realistic conflict, there's generally no plot.

But the characterization in this story is so strong, and the voices are so well done, that it carries the reader along. It's very sweet and it's very clever -- and yet it's very simple.[7]


If life is dragging you down and you need something to cheer you up, just read this. :-) [8]
That's such a lovely piece of writing! And so satisfying.[9]
What a delightful read!... Naughty Bodie sending his assorted Danish magazines! [10]


  1. In The Hatstand Express #6 (1985) from a fan listing what was supposed to be her top 10 Pros stories; the list turned out to be 50 stories long
  2. from The Hatstand Express #6 (1985).
  3. from The Hatstand Express #18 (1988)
  4. from a fan in Short Circuit #3 (October 1990)
  5. from DIAL #3
  6. The Devils Workshop rec thread dated October 2, 2007.
  7. The Devils Workshop rec thread dated October 2, 2007; WebCite.
  8. from cloudless 9193's Live Journal, 2010
  9. from cloudless 9193's Live Journal, 2010
  10. from cloudless 9193's Live Journal, 2010