Little Sorrows
| K/S Fanfiction | |
|---|---|
| Title: | Little Sorrows |
| Author(s): | Dovya Blacque |
| Date(s): | 1986 |
| Length: | 16,432 words 49 pages |
| Genre: | slash |
| Fandom: | Star Trek: The Original Series |
| External Links: | The Kirk/Spock FanFiction Archive on AO3 |
Click here for related articles on Fanlore. | |
Little Sorrows is a K/S story written by Dovya Blacque.
It was published in the print zine As I Do Thee #4 (1986) and is available online. It was rewritten and reprinted in Thunder & Lightning.
Summary
"After a close friend dies, Kirk starts having sleeping problems and Spock discovers that there was a mental link between the two men. To keep Kirk alive, Spock replaces the broken link in Kirk's mind with one from his own."
Reactions and Reviews
It turns out bonding with Spock is the only cure for Jim's insomnia. What's a Vulcan to do? In this one, I like the way the relationship evolves organically. [1]
As this story opens. Jim Kirk can't sleep. "...Everything that could be wrong, was wrong, The sheets were too hot. The pillow was too high. The room temperature felt stifling. His hair hurt." None of these circumstances (I especially like the last) turn out to be the real reason for his continued insomnia.It rapidly turns into a worrisome situation: despite Kirk's trouble getting to sleep, in the morning he's so fast asleep that McCoy and Spock combined can barely wake him up. A deeply worried Spock has a late-night talk with Kirk and ferrets out the truth: Kirk's trouble started the day after a dose friend of his. a Lieutenant Avrim Tellir, died by accident on their last mission. Spock, knowing that Tellir was of a race bred for their telepathic powers, suspects that Kirk and Tellir may have inadvertently formed a link between them, not unlike the Vulcan bonding link. Now that Tellir is dead, Kirk's mind keeps searching for the other end of the link: he can't function on his won anymore, and Spock fears that Kirk will simply die in his sleep, as a Vulcan would is such a situation.
Despite McCoy's vigilance, Spock's fears almost come true, and it's evident that this is a deadend situation: Kirk can't stay awake forever, and if he tries to steep he'll die. Eventually, Spock comes to McCoy with the only solution he's been able to find: "..To replace that which has been taken away would surely end his troubles," In other words, he's willing to supply the other end of the link, making him incapable of bonding with anyone else, Kirk doesn't want to accept this solution: "I can't let you do this for me." He glanced away. "And..oh, hell! There would be more to it than just a link, more than was between Avrim and me. There would have to be."
Spock. distressed by Kirk's turmoil, tries to explain, Kirk is deeply moved by Spock's attempt to apologize for his own sacrifice, and recognizes the love Spock must have for him to offer this. They stand together:..A long-fingered hand rose to stray through Kirk's hair, to gently trace the contours of Kirk's face, to finally come to rest in the meld position. "All you need do is say 'yes' or 'no' and either it will be done for all time or we will never speak of it again." (Great line, or what?)
Kirk, of course, says yes, and falls into an exhausted sleep...in Spock's arms. (Merel Decker's illustration of this scene is spot-on, very moving. Kirk is seated on the bed, braced between Spock's legs, head resting against Spock's shoulder and right hand clenched against Spock's chest as if he wants to hold on to Spock but doesn't dare; and Spock, supporting his friend with both arms, bends his head down to Kirk's hair with a still, tender expression that turns my knees to water. Beautiful.)
For a while, all they do is sleep together in the literal sense with the link so new, Spock finds it difficult to be apart.
That, by the way. is one of the reasons I like this story: the author doesn't just throw Kirk and Spock in bed together, but shows us how their friendship deepens with this change in their relationship. Don't worry, the inevitable does happen, Oh, yes indeedy. And this is one of those occasions where Spock takes the upper hand the first time. That isn't what makes it a great sex scene, though: it's the way both Kirk and Spock seem overwhelmed that this is actually happening, that they can love and need each other so much. '...Kirk held the trembling body as Spock collapsed on top of him, wrapping his quivering legs around Spock's thighs, holding him in place, kissing the closed eyes, the cheeks, now and finally, the gasping mouth, Thank you, thank you, thank you.,.,"he muttered between kisses, not caring if he sounded ridiculous, only knowing that his lover was still deep inside him, knowing that even after their bodies parted, Spock would always be as deep within him as he was at that moment."
The only thing I don't like in this story is the introduction of the late Avrim Tellir: he's not so much a person as a plot device, about as believable as Spock's sudden acquisition of a rebel half-brother in ST:V
Otherwise, I find nothing to cavil at: unlike others I've read, this story isn't in a rush to get to the happy end, which of course makes the end that much more satisfying when it comes. [2]
This is a comforting story — containing hardly any frustration, pain or agony. Just a taste of “that simple feeling”, which is sometimes just what the doctor ordered.Kirk is sleepless, then becomes pathologically sleepy, finally to the point of cardiac arrest. Bones is helpless, but Spock has a special insight — Kirk is suffering all the symptoms of a severed link. A link with an old friend he hadn’t known existed. The friend has been killed and Kirk is paying a terrible price.
That the answer was obvious didn’t bother me at all — I was caught up in the story. A replacement link is created of course, but the beauty of the tale is in the warm and wonderful way the link draws two souls together.
For example, after Kirk has regained his ability to sleep, he awakes in the middle of the night with an unsettled feeling and, as awareness dawns, he dresses and slips into Spock’s cabin. He knows from the uneven breathing the Vulcan is not asleep.
“Spock? You okay?”
The dark head turned away from him. “I am fine, Jim. you should be asleep.”
“I was asleep.” Kirk came closer, to the edge of the bed. “You woke me up.”
“I have tried to shield you from ... this. ... It is so new. It is difficult to be ... apart.”
Yeah. [3]
After a close friend dies, Kirk starts having sleeping problems and Spock discovers that there was a mental link between the two men. Spock must bond with Jim in order to save his life." This was so sweet and loving and the friendship between Kirk, Spock and Bones was palpable here, exactly like the series. Simply beautiful. [4]
When Jim starts experiencing insomnia and increasing difficulty to wake up after a close Academy friend's death, Spock discovers the two men shared a mental link that is now slowly dragging his captain in death. Very interesting plot and trademark Dovya - which means soft and tender and first time, total devotion and love between Jim and Spock even before sex was involved and nice McCoy interaction. Awww. Spock's solution was predictable but t was still lovely to see how it brought them together. [5]
References
- ^ from Recs by Rhaegal
- ^ Come Together #26 (02/1996)
- ^ The K/S Press #17 (01/1998)
- ^ from Past and Present Intertwined - Star Trek Kirk/Spock fic recs post, posted February 28, 2010, accessed June 19, 2013
- ^ 4 September 2009 Master List of K/S Favorites *Updated Nov 19, 2013*, Mary Monroe