I Know You're a Mistake I Won't Regret

Fanfiction
Title:	I Know You're a Mistake I Won't Regret
Author(s):	LunaCanisLupus_22
Date(s):	20 April 2016
Length:	40,931 words
Genre(s):	slash fanfiction, Alpha/Beta/Omega
Fandom(s):	Hawaii Five-0
Relationship(s):
External Links:	I Know You're a Mistake I Won't Regret (AO3)
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I Know You're a Mistake I Won't Regret is a Steve/Danny story by LunaCanisLupus_22.

Summary:

“I don’t know how your omega at home lives with you,” Danny says, half serious, half mocking. It’s a throw away comment. Not meant for further thought but Steve stiffens considerably, hackles rising with the urge to attack and defend. Mostly because there is no omega waiting for him at home. And there’s no alpha Lieutenant Commander, Steve McGarrett, either.

Author's notes:

Whoa, okay so this was a doozy. Basically the idea came to me watching that first episode when Steve gets Danny into a lock, forcing his arm behind his back and I was like, huh, what if he got a thrill out of it (and better yet, what if he was an omega getting a thrill out of subduing an alpha) and that's how it started.

This is a tentative dip back into the a/b/o pool and I wanted to write a fic that doesn't promote the harmful tropes of the a/b/o universe like the dubious consent, lack of autonomy, unequal power dynamics and the possessive and unhealthy behaviours in these relationships. I wanted a positive take on it that wasn't so black and white. Especially since a/b/o has a tendency to be a bit transphobic (you were born an alpha so therefore you are one, etc) so I've tried to consciously avoid any of those harmful indicators in the language and story process. That being said, if there's any messages I've put across that are very not-good please let me know.

Also, I feel like I should point out that I have very minimal understanding of psychologists and how therapy dialogues work so I sort of made it up as I went, so I hope it still came across realistically. The plot mostly follows the pilot episode before diving off the canon deep end (I didn't even have Danny's son in this because it was too complicated to explain, and Grace is still very young since it's based as an origin story from season one). Some of the dialogue might seem familiar since it's from the first episode (just so you don't think I'm trying to pass off their fantastic banter as my own) but anything else comes from this ol' brain here.

Recs and Reviews

This is outrageously hot and intense! I love how you explored Steve's emotional journey along with his sexual awakening. I love how so many people focused on what was expected-tall, strong alphas and short soft omegas, and how your story pointed out you cannot stereotype anyone based on appearance and sexual orientation. I especially love how strong and controlled Danny was, and how intensely thoughtful and supportive he was and how patient!! Just fantastic!

God this fic is a wonder. It's everything I dreamed of while reading the summary and so much more. I love you Steve, but I'm utterly in love with your Danny and the way he just fits, in his skin and in Steve world. Thank you so much for this!

The structure of this is absolutely flawless. The way you developed their relationship, cautious of the realistic struggles living in an A/B/O verse could create (which you've explored in a way I don't think I've ever seen before), is just pure perfection. Really, truly, thank you for writing this. xxx

So, this is the first a/b/o I've ever read, as a rule I never click on this sort of fic because I'm a bit afraid of the possible power dynamics, but I clicked on yours because of your note saying you hoped no transphobic comment had made it through and it got me thinking and I decided to give it a chance and I'm so glad I did. I was in awe with your wording of emotions, by the plot, trying to figure out first how a/b/o usually works and how this fic differed from it, Danny was hands down amazing and gosh I hurt for Steve and the more I read the more identified I felt with him and the way cognitive dissonance shaped his behaviour but never took over his entire life, and then I got it, the metaphor (I'm really slow with metaphors and figures of speech) and I was vibrating on the inside because I kept thinking this is me (a bit), you put into words what happens to me. And I'm kinda rambling I know, but basically I just wanted to say thank you! Thank you so much!

Oh my gosh where to even begin. First off this my friend was amazing and wonderful. You made this so realistic that I could accept this as canon. Two, your characterization of the characters is just spot on. You didn't rush anything for Steve, you didn't magically make him better; you had us experience what he was feeling, questioning along with him fearing with him laughing with him and hoping with him. I wanted to just wrap him in a hug and go straight to the end but this was so beautiful and good and just wow. Thank you so so so much for writing and sharing this because it is phenomenal.

It took me a good two hours after finishing this story to deal with my feelings about it before I could write a coherent comment. First of all, I love reluctant/body dismorphic omega!Steve. That's how I wrote him in my omegaverse mcdanno story. Your story is just in so much more depth, I'm almost jealous! You've written an amazing character journey for Steve, and I love how his romance with Danny is separate from that, but still entwined somewhat. I loved the way you used Steve's visits to Dr. Ishiguro to show the advancement of his character growth, especially to show how he started to let himself think about topics he previously avoided thinking about at all costs. Patient and loving alpha!Danny is totally my jam, too. I loved this story a lot. Thank you so much for sharing it!

I’ve read omegaverse fic that involves omegas suppressing their status before, but this comes closest to doing it in a trans way that really resonates for me.