Hatstand Express Interview with O Yardley

Interviews by Fans
Title:	Hatstand Express Interview with O Yardley
Interviewer:
Interviewee:	O Yardley
Date(s):	1988
Medium:	print
Fandom(s):	The Professionals
External Links:
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In 1988, O Yardley was interviewed for The Hatstand Express #17.

For others in this series, see Hatstand Interview Series.

Some Excerpts

How did you get interested in these characters?

By having my nose rubbed in the earliest hatstands by a K/S editor who has regretted it ever since.

What was the first B/D story you read? Do you still like it or dislike it?

"Consequences". I hated it and still do. Because I hate violence.

Do you see the "/" relationship in the shows themselves? Or is it only hinted at? Or is "/" simply wishful thinking, an alternate universe?

If I want to, yes. Hinted at? With a sledge-hammer if I'm in that sort of mood. But then if I'm in that sort of mood I can see "/" in "Watch with Mother".

Which character is your favorite, if you have a favorite?

I don't have a favourite character. I like them both. I find Doyle the sexiest; possibly his innate vulgarity allied to his optimistic attempts to appear well-bred, well-read and deep accounts for this. I find Bodie's attempts to pretend to vicious blood-thirstiness which do not cover his underlying tendency to soggy insecurity rather endearing. I can offer you examples from the shows to point up any character trait I choose to portray. In other words they are a complex mass of contradictions just the same as the rest of us which is why I like to write about them.

How long have you been writing?

I scribbled my first tale when I was five. My mother kept it for years. I've written on and off all my life and find it deeply satisfying. When I was at school I did scurrilous pen portraits of all the staff, or wrote long fantasy-epics in rhyming couplets. None of these now exist. I tried writing children's fantasy and collected rejection slips as a hobby at one time. Then I found Trek and an audience who actually wanted to read what I wrote. After that,I found K/S and my life has never been the same since.

What was the first B/D story you wrote? Have you read it since? What do you think of it now after writing the characters for several years?

"Among the Lilies" or "The Gift", I can't now remember which. Haven't I improved!

Is there a particular type of story that you have not written which you still want to write?

Yes, a really good one with not a single flaw.

What do you hate to see done to the characters? Is there a type of story you hate? Have you ever written a story in which you've done what you hate to a character?

I hate violence. Loathe it. I hate cruelty in any form, mental or physical. I also dislike rudeness, bad manners and lack of consideration for others — aren't I a prig! So I hate to see characters subjected to lingering and descriptive rape and torture — yes, I appreciate sometimes these devices have to be used, but if they are dwelt on I skip large chunks until I get to the palatable parts.

I dislike maudlin and sentimental wallows in illness or disability as something uplifting and meaningful. Illness is miserable, uncomfortable, messy, smelly, unromantic, tedious and strips you of all dignity. Lying about for a few days being pale and interesting is probably a very novel and moving experience; being seriously ill or disabled as a long-term thing takes guts and fortitude beyond the power of any of us to understand who haven't been there. I've seen it very closely second-hand but I don't pretend to any comprehension of its reality. I defend to the last everyone's right to write what they like though. My dislikes are my affair, no one else's.

Did you ever have trouble doing sex scenes? Do you enjoy writing, reading them?

Haven't had any trouble with them yet. But whether or not I enjoy reading them depends totally on the writer. H.G.., |Sebastien and E.T. can make drinking a cup of tea sexy; some writers read like plumbing manuals.

What stories do fans compliment you on the most; what stories have you received the most comment on?

Mostly my long stories, especially "Injured Innocents", but also "That Little Twinkle".

What inspired you to write the "Party Spirits" sequence?

"Party Spirits" sequence was triggered off by a few throwaway sentences in a story by Sebastien, Pleasure Bent, the one with the love beads. Mention is made of the fact that they used to kiss when they were drunk but never talked about it, and I loved the idea of that quiet, unacknowledged secret between them.

I'm not sure I did the idea justice but writing shorts like those during the last three horrendously stressful years was a life-saver. I worked the sequence out completely before I began and before my troubles started and knew at what stage each new step would be taken, so I had something to work on that I didn't have to think about, if you follow me, and that was a great help to me while my world was falling apart.

Did you find it difficult to do (and maintain) the first person point of view for Bear Necessity and A Necessary Evil?

I don't find it difficult now. I served my apprenticeship in K/S writing a story with another writer who always took Spock's p.o.v. while I always wrote Kirk's. It was an interesting experience, and while the result is not one I'm particularly proud of, it was very good for learning the technique of first person writing, even though that particular story was not written in the first person. One day, but don't ask me when, for god's sake, I will get round to writing the third part of that "Bear Necessity" trilogy. All I have as yet is the title which will be, "Sufficient Unto The Day..."

Do the Americanisms you see in B/D stories bother you?

Ah, the vexed question of American (or other foreign) writers doing B/D. The honest answer is that Americanisms grate, which is why I won't write S/H, Miami Vice, or any other U.S. fandom. And yes, I did get some adverse comments on my Trek writing - well how was I to know Kirk wouldn't say 'bloody'? I still maintain he could pick up a lot of bad habits in 300 years.

Having said that, if I loved any U.S. series enough (as I did and do Trek) I'd write stories and to hell with anyone else's opinion. I write for me and Englishisms don't grate on me because I don't recognise them, but I would always send my stories to an American for vetting before I let them loose on the world. I don't really see why we have to worry and fret over this. Every-one has their own personal reaction and is entitled to it, the only thing I deplore is unpleasantness or rudeness. There's enough ugliness and unhappiness in this world. If Americanisms (or OZisms) worry one too much one can always invest in a bottle of Tippex and make alterations. If the story quality is good enough, they don't matter anyway. Where The Worms Are is on my list of permanent favourites and that's chock-full of Americanisms.

Injured Innocents is a story full of lovely images that suggest you enjoyed writing it very much. Is this true?

I loved every minute of writing Injured Innocents. I wish now I could rewrite the beginning because it's quite embarrassing to see how much I improved as I went through it.

This fandom began with "/" stories and eventually "straight" stories were written, a backward progression compared to that in other fandoms. Do you ever have an urge to write a purely straight story? Have you done a straight story.

I'm not sure you're right about this fandom beginning with "/". That may have been the case the U.S. but I have a feeling there were straight zines over here although I don't have any of them.

Of the stories you have read, which is your favorite? Why?

I couldn't possibly pick out one favourite. I can pick out favourite writers — H.G., Sebastien, E.T. Possibly the best writer of the three is Sebastien, but she is equally the least comfortable, or most disturbing, whichever way you like to put it — which is why she's probably the best of all of us.

How have the stories that you read changed over time? Are they better? Is there more plot, more characterization.

I'd say generally speaking the standard of stories has dropped over the few years B/D fandom has existed. More is not necessarily better.

Reactions and Reviews

O. Yardley's interview was an entertaining read, betraying a charm of personality and furnishing an interesting and amusing insight into her writing methodology. It's too bad that she seemed to feel the need to mitigate her statements and opinions with little one-liners at the end of some of her responses, as if in fear of other fans taking exception to an expression of her own point of view. Her interview was just the right length.