Gravity's Angel

Fanfiction
Title:	Gravity's Angel
Author(s):	anonymous
Date(s):	pre-1993
Length:	67 pages
Genre(s):	rape fic, rape recovery
Fandom(s):	The Professionals
Relationship(s):
External Links:
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Gravity's Angel is a 67-page Professionals AU circuit story by an anonymous author that focuses on a somewhat familiar fandom trope: rape fic and rape recovery.

The author has never been identified.

Criticisms of the story are numerous: many plot threads and character threads are abandoned or left hanging. Doyle has a black belt in karate, but when he's kidnapped he makes no use of his skills to fight back. When Bodie and Doyle resume their sexual relationship, a source of tension is that Doyle keeps to himself and refuses to spent time with Bodie outside the bedroom. To some readers this offered the author an opportunity to force Bodie, who had walked away from the relationship, to examine his feelings and open himself to them. This emotional thread was dropped during the second half of the story. And finally, as with many rape recovery stories, many readers felt that the "sexual healing" took place too close to the rape. (In fact the same day).

In spite of all this criticisms, some fans felt the story represented one of the more poetic examples of fan fiction in Pros fandom.

Summary

The plot of the story is deceptively simple: the first half sets up the relationship between the characters. Ray Doyle is a successful commercial photographer who was, at one time, involved with William Bodie, a CI5 agent. Because Bodie works undercover, he cannot talk about his job or his life, leaving Doyle feeling left out. Bodie dumps Ray when he has to go out of town for a long undercover assignment. Eventually, the broken-hearted Doyle moves on. Bodie returns and wants to start up their relationship and they begin to have casual sex. However, neither man is willing to risk themselves to love.

The second half is the crime adventure/detection section. Doyle is kidnapped, raped and is rescued by Bodie. As Doyle sleeps with Bodie, Doyle realizes he is still in love with him, in spite of everything that has happened.

Reactions and Reviews

1991

There's a great story I've just read called "Gravity's Angel". In It, Bodie and Doyle are gay; Bodie is in CI5 and Doyle is not. Doyle does not know how Bodie is employed. They had a relationship at some time past, which Bodie broke off. Here, they have met and are trying again. This story says a lot about what the other half has to go through in dealing with Bodie*s moods, irregular schedule, demands on a relationship, and what he hides from his partner. And all from the viewpoint of a sympathetic (to the reader) partner. And you don't really have to involve the "other" (Cassie in this story) in a case to get this across, although for plot reasons "Gravity's Angel" does. I'd like to see this well done.

1993

I just finished reading a Pros circuit story called "Gravity's Angel" and wanted to know if anyone knew who the author was. It's an AU (Doyle as photographer, Bodie as dark/brooding/dangerous C15) with a very eloquent ending. I've often wondered where the true slash poets were hiding.

"I want to record: that for an hour and a half, a moment in a lifetime. we had this love. I want to record this hour and a half for the years to come of emptiness, and noise and fastmoving hollow laughter, and creeping numbness. I want to record it as something that was warm, dark, overflowing with loveliness, remorselessly good, ephemeral perhaps, but real.

Whatever happens from here, I want to remember it in years to come, with a glow inside, and no bitterness.

just read "Gravity's Angel"....and it really does rate as one of the best pieces of prose I've read in Pros (who the hell wrote it, I want more)...."

Somewhat apropos of "Brother's Keeper" but not exactly, there are an awful lot of Pros AUs that have this premise of "what if one of the lads were not in CI5 while the other one is and they end up lovers anyway." Soooo, guess what the end result is usually -- a lot of tension over the fact that one of them has a dangerous job and Can't Talk About It. You can see it coming a mile off. I just read "Gravity's Angel" ... and it really does rate as one of the best pieces of prose I've read in Pros (who the hell wrote it, I want more), but my tiny niggling complaint is this: why use this premise over and over, people? We are lucky enough to have a source series that has the lads in the same job, so they CAN talk, and it's the unlucky girls who fall by the wayside. There's also a lot of tension and angst in the show already (some of it featuring them NOT talking when they could be, like "Wild Justice,"), which can be hacked away at in stories; so why go out of one's way to write the typical heterosexual setup of two people who the job separates?

1996

I loved the start and the set up but then it really bugged me. Ray Doyle is a successful commercial photographer who was at one time involved with one William Bodie who dumped him when he had to go out of town for a long time. It broke his heart and picks up where Bodie has returned, Doyle involved with someone else and Bodie want's to start up again. Neither one willing to love. Now I wanted a relationship piece... I mean that was the whole wonderful setup during the first half then suddenly Doyle is kidnapped and it's not even a good detection piece. And of course Doyle is raped at the end...has to be rescued by Bodie even though at the beginning it's been established that he's a black belt... and to top it off he and Bodie have sex with in a day of the rape. The end of this piece just bugged the hell out of me in sooo many ways. We won't go into the rape bit and having sex within hours of that occurring-- see previous posts for my rants on this subject.

I don't like to see either of OIH as victims who can't defend themselves... I want them to be able to think and fight... and resent the fact that she [has] Doyle as a black belt and then did nothing with it. Also there were lots of emotional angst plot threads that were just sort of left hanging. One was where Ray when he got back together with Bodie would have sex with him but wouldn't go out and do all those fun things they had done together before. This was a great thread and one where I wanted to see Bodie suffering-- he'd been the one to back off and hurt Ray and I thought he deserved his treatment and I wanted to see him open up and expose himself to Ray and realize that he owed Ray for leaving him the way he did. That line just dropped ...

Then there was Ray finding out that B was in CI5... another plot line that was sort of just dropped..

And then after everything the author just assumed that Ray in jepordy would take care of all their problems... now if I'd had a lover who'd lied to me all along about what he did for a living and then I get kidnapped and raped by people trying to get at him I'd sure as hell want to contemplate that relationship rather than fall into his arms.

It's easy to criticise what I don't like so let me tell you want I'd like to have seen. I'd like to have the kidnapping and danger made into a much smaller part of the story and some of the issues delt with. B dumping R for one. I want to see a little groveling on the part of the person who does the hurting.

Now unlike most I'm neither a Bodieite or Doyleite... I find I like them both equally and my desire for who grovels is based on who did what in each story. In this one I thought Bodie in the beginning was a perfect jack ass and deserved to grovel. In other stories I feel that way about Ray so no prejudice. I want to see Bodie realize that he loved Ray and that he'd given up the best thing he ever had and to do everything in his power to get Ray back-- And finally when the case came round I'd have liked to see them work together to resolve it and have some of that black belt skill that the author mentions used by Ray.

Well that's a brief rundown of one of the near misses for me.

I'm sure I'll think of others.

2009

I've just re-read this story and feel there's something very appealing about it, not sure what it is...... oh yes, I know! Writing and images like this:

Bodie was wearing a black sleeveless T-shirt and tight black jeans. "I was once in love with those arms," thought Doyle.

The story begins with Doyle bumping into Bodie again after a painful breaking up and the rest is, as they say, not just history, but sheer pleasure:

I keep remembering how beautiful he looked in the slit of early dawn light that entered through the gap in the curtains. Cold, blue light highlighting only contours it hit directly, leaving the rest of him in shadow. Beautiful.

Go on! Give yourself a treat when you're stuck at home, snowbound.

Bodie was wearing a black sleeveless T-shirt and tight black jeans. "I was once in love with those arms," thought Doyle.

Oh wow, if that doesn't convince people to read it, I don't know what would... *happy achey sigh*

I know I've read this before and liked it, but not for ages, so I must give it another go! Thank you!

Thank you for this, I've printed it out ready to read. For some reason I tend to neglect the CD unless I see a rec for it, so I'm very grateful for this.

This story if from the Proslib CD. I apologize for any trouble to get hold of the story. But I hope that everybody was able to read it! And there is still time – I can send it in a minute...

There are some treasures on the CD – and I think that this story is one of them. (So go and join the Yahoo group and get the CD!)

A few days ago, when I reread the story and started with that rec – I had first no idea what to write. Because actually there is a lot I normally dislike in a story. First of all it’s Doyle/OMC at the beginning. That’s a real challenge for me OTP girl. Then it’s AU, well not an entirely other world – Bodie is in CI5 – but Doyle is a photographer. Then the whole art-scene, with parties and drugs. And most of all there is a lot of insecurity and even pretending between Bodie and Doyle.

Despite all that, despite all the angst in the story, despite that OMC – the story caught me from the beginning, probably because the author was able to build up a good and convincing scenario.

Yes, I think there is so much ‘in’ this story. Here are just a few notes.

A different scenario Both in CI5 – that’s easy for them. I mean to be friends, or to love each other. It’s that ‘us against the world’ feeling. It’s easy to belong together, when you have the impression that nobody else understands you, that everybody else would disapprove the job – the killing. That you can’t talk to anybody about your feelings and fears. Especially not if you pick up your girls on occasion and just because of the good look... How can such girls understand them? Here both live in different worlds. And obviously Bodie can’t imagine that Doyle would ever fit to his. And they have big problems in their partnership!

AIDS Not often even mentioned in Pros. Although the time was right. I know just one other story where it occurs (Doyle is an activist of a gay group), and only Minerva’s story deals with one of them being infected. Here it’s no main subject – and I’m glad about it! – but it appears as something two gay men would naturally(?) talk about at that time.

Doyle losing his innocence and happiness being together again with Bodie and leaving Steve. That is something very unusual for me! That both are obviously not good for each other – because they are not able to break down the walls. Doyle is hurt and Bodie can’t do anything against Doyle just wanting cold-blooded sex.

Doyle is not a nice guy He is sometimes a quite selfish bastard. He isn’t really interested in Bodie’s work, otherwise he would have asked more. He is happy that he can talk about HIS daily life that is obviously so much more interesting than Bodie’s… Then there is the way he thinks about CI5, after he finds out. Typical for the scene he lives in. He takes drugs(occasionally) and he even was a drug dealer as a kid.

War and Sex That’s a very intense scene after the events in the Chilean Embassy. Doyle isn’t the selfish bastard! He really cares. And Bodie is exhausted but anyway he first doesn’t dare to break his walls – but when he does he is very violent. Doyle is his valve. Coming back to senses he realises that he endangers Doyle - and leaves him again. Huh! That whole scene is great!

How about Murphy? I’m not sure. Without Doyle as partner, Bodie would have been probably very close to Murphy. OR - without Doyle as a partner, Bodie hasn’t open so much to anybody. And it really seems so: “Bodie was not particularly accustomed to warm social contact…” Maybe he is a loner. But anyway – he must be very upset about the death of Murphy! But again Doyle doesn’t notice that. Bodie doesn’t dare to speak about his feelings – and Doyle doesn’t care enough... Great! (I dunno if that makes a relationship between men easier!?)

The end and rape It’s a good end. I mean well done, not that I think that the rape was ‘necessary’ – but maybe it’s there to show how they treat Doyle afterwards – just a pansy being raped...

The very end ” I want to remember forever this moment in my lifetime when we shared love. I'll always have the memory for the empty years ahead, with hollow laughter and creeping numbness. Whatever happens from here, I want to cling to this feeling, overflowing with loveliness and undeniably real, to store it away inside with a warm glow and no bitterness.” To be true – I don’t understand it... Why “empty years ahead” ?

Who was it?

Would be nice if the author would be still around... How about an outing? ;-)

I'm sorry to say this... but this wasn't my type of fic at all (surprise, surprise... you guessed, right?)... I just never got into it, and when I really tried that Steve guy popped up and I got sidetracked again... *sigh*

I have some trouble with "other" characters other than Bodie, Doyle and the guys in CI5, I'm sorry to say... *shakes head* So I kinda half read, half listened to music and half sighed repetedly... when I think about it... I don't know how much I actually read...

AIDS. Not often even mentioned in Pros. Although the time was right. I know just one other story where it occurs (Doyle is an activist of a gay group), and only Minerva’s story deals with one of them being infected. Here it’s no main subject – and I’m glad about it! – but it appears as something two gay men would naturally(?) talk about at that time.

I agree with this and have to say that this part was "good" compaired to other things... like the way this text is written and some dialogue... this text didn't "float" in my oppinion... well, anyway... I think I'm in a bad mood since yesterday and that that has affected my brain... I do apologise if I sound too... bitchy... *hugs*

And the epilogue just twisted my brain... First the good stuff and then "empty years ahead"... just like you said... weird...

Would be nice if the author would be still around... How about an outing?

Why not? *shrug* :)

The text was okay, but I probably won't read it again I'm afraid. *hugs*

Thank you so much for this rec, I absolutely loved this fic, and your review has highlighted some of the best or most interesting aspects. I wish 'anonymous' would stand up and take a bow!

The language impressed me very much, like “the silent, elusive rightness”.

The structure too. I like the way it moves from Ray completely immersed in his glamorous but shallow yuppy life, independent and self-assured, to him leaving that behind, his thoughts and his life progressively centring more and more on Bodie, until Bodie coming to find him is the single most important thing to Doyle as a hostage.

Mmm, good that Aids was mentioned, but I found that scene a bit artificial, it didn't connect well with anything else, it was just there like a public health warning.

Funny that it can be so canon (I mean, lots of references to things that happened in the eps, or could have), while still being AU. There is just that one difference, that Doyle isn't a CI5 agent.

I think your remarks are very perceptive on how this affects the relationship. It seemed to me that Bodie was completely torn between loving Doyle and wanting to keep him out of harm's way, so he kept trying to break it off, then coming back again. It wasn't all that clear, because of Doyle's egocentric point of view, as you pointed out.

I was hoping you might have an explanation for that strange pessimistic ending to Doyle's memoir. Is it that he anticipates that even if they have a relationship, inevitably it will become dull and boring, or unhappy? Or (nasty thought) what if Doyle contracted Aids from being raped? But it sounds as though he is imagining himself in the future living on, without Bodie.

All in all, I admit I found the story rather tedious. I didn't like either character and neither sounded like my lads. Generally, for a story to work, I have to "see" and "hear" the characters in my head. I didn't for this story. I ended up skimming to the end. The epilogue was odd, since it was suddenly in first person. It just didn't sound like Doyle at all. He was a bit too whiny in this for me. I think Doyle is tough yet fair, and this Doyle wasn't like that. He was quite egotistical I felt. Bodie was a bit bland. Some parts were done better than others. The abduction and rape scenes were more interesting, even if I did find the sex with Bodie after a bit rushed without enough time taken to heal after such violence.

I liked the way both Bodie and Doyle were quite flawed and not particularly likable, well Doyle anyway, Bodie was rather shadowy because we only had Doyle's POV. It made them right for each other and bad news for anyone else. The only character I couldn't see and hear was Stephen. Although there was lots of description of him, I couldn't relate him to any familiar mental image so he remained sort of nebulous for me, but that was appropriate since he wasn't very significant to Doyle anyway.

I read for very different reasons than most other people. I prefer canon characters and I happen to like canon Bodie and Doyle. I'm not interested in reading about characters so different than my lads. Then it's not Pros to me, but an exercise in writing. That's all fine and good, but not what I care to spend time reading. I read original m/m fic so I get my fix for "new" characters there. When I want Pros or S&H, that's only what I want.

Stephen was doomed because he was portrayed as caring and loving. *g* Since Doyle was a horrid man, he had to give him the boot.

I happen to actually prefer single POV stories. I write that way most of the time because I like the discovery through the eyes of the character. It's hard to care about this portrayal of Doyle because I didn't like him. If I don't care about the character, then I lose interest quickly.

"I prefer canon characters and I happen to like canon Bodie and Doyle. I'm not interested in reading about characters so different than my lads."

I totally agree! But here we have the scenario that at one point in Doyle's life he had done another decision. And for me this story could be the result of it. I can imagine that being a photographer would have an impact on Doyle's personality. Could be that despite his guilt trips, being a CI5 agent is his only satisfying destination... And without Doyle as his CI5 partner, Bodie would be different too. The loner. For me they are canon characters - as much as in any other good AU.

"It's hard to care about this portrayal of Doyle because I didn't like him. If I don't care about the character, then I lose interest quickly."

Yes, selfish bastard... But I give him credit because Bodie has left him a year ago, and I take a lot of his acting as self-protection. And after the events at the Chilean Embassy he really cares about Bodie's life.

But here we have the scenario that at one point in Doyle's life he had done another decision.

So that's where the writer loses me in an AU. What works for you doesn't for me. But hey, that gives us more stories to try, the way I look at it.

For any AU in any fandom I read, my criteria works like this: if the names of the characters were removed and replaced with One and Two, could you recognize your boys? If not, then it's not my kind of AU. It's like redoing a Pros story into an original fic that's been cleaned and polished like Larton or Hunted by Devils. I see Bodie and Doyle clearly in Hunted by Devils, but not at all in Larton. I would "know" that Hunted was my lads without being told. To me, that's the perfect AU. And when it works, I'm giddy with delight.

I don't mind reading a story that doesn't really work if it's good writing. This story was written fairly well so that I was able to read large parts and get to the end. I do get a little bored when the same arguments are held time and again. I'm not much for "soap opera" type things, where a topic is beaten to death constantly. I prefer less drama and more (respectful) loving. *g* Thankfully, that one scene that started violently turned loving. If it hadn't that's when I would have run off permanently.

I thought the story was well-written but it's not really the sort of story that I go for.

I get the feeling the author was going for a mood of 'gritty realism', which I think was achieved pretty well - their relationship came across as believable, being as it was full of wariness, misunderstandings and uncertainty. You feel that their relationship is ultimately intense, but fragile, and that there is no guarantee that they will live happily ever after, hence the ending: Doyle is no idealistic romantic in this universe. He can't see himself finding love with one person for the rest of his life, even with Bodie - he's not that lucky.

Personally I prefer something a little more romantic and escapist (while still keeping the lads in character and not making them too unrealistically girly!)

I think there was just an announcement for Proslib, and the story is spoilered with “death” and “partner betrayal”… I mean - that’s the worst thing I can imagine for a fic. So this story is quite harmless and nice! :-)

Bagels as a snack food?!

This was the most puzzling aspect of the story. Who watches movies and eats bagels? Is that a British thing?

Well, to be honest, this was better than I expected. There's a real effort at a character ARC (Doyle's) and to establish scene and setting. And I always appreciate a plot that makes even a little bit of sense.

There are a number of holes -- plot, of course, but also character motivation and emotional inconsistencies -- and quite a few corny cliches, but overall enjoyable.

I thought Doyle's fear of rejection (once he knew about CI5 and Bodie's role) seemed unlikely -- unless we were supposed to think he was that self-absorbed and childish. (?) It gets decidedly melodramatic from the point of Doyle's kidnapping. NOT that I object to Doyle being kidnapped or Bodie rushing to the rescue. *g* But a little bit more time and effort would have provided believable motivation for the dumb decisions that are made.

Some odd rushed bits like this: "The flames of the coal fire licked comfortingly in the hearth, soothing his wounds." I know what the writer was trying to say, but...er...no.

"Doyle's thoughts were too bitty to merge into any logical strand." *g*

And then the sudden, odd change to first person POV for the epilogue.

Yet...mostly enjoyable. Thanks for this rec!

Like mysteriousaliwz said, "their relationship came across as believable, being as it was full of wariness, misunderstandings and uncertainty. You feel that their relationship is ultimately intense, but fragile, and that there is no guarantee that they will live happily ever after"

I think so too. It's my impression that it is one of those stories in fanfiction who are fed by the writers personal experiences and sometimes then it's not easy to follow the story completely.

A well written story, an interesting read. Thank you for the rec!

I'm always a happy ending fan. But I can happily live with this story, because both 'try' honestly to do their best! Maybe the odds are against them - but they are never mean or deliberately insulting - and that's a lot nowadays!!!

I had read it a long time ago and can’t remember many details of it but what I do remember thinking is that although it wasn’t a perfect story by any means (and I think the faults have been well covered) I do remember loving and enjoying it, even when I didn’t expect to. And I think the reason is that the story has enough 'magical moments' for me to overlook the imperfections. Magical moments like the following which hooked me for the rest of the story:

Doyle glanced vaguely in the direction of the drinks table. By it, a black-clad figure was filling a glass with red wine. The sheer familiarity of that presence hit Doyle like a mild electric shock. Momentarily, his senses filled with the remembrance of the shape of Bodie's body.......Bodie was wearing a black sleeveless T-shirt and tight black jeans. "I was once in love with those arms," thought Doyle.

YES! Me, too, mate. I loved that moment and I can actually *see* it.... Bodie standing before me in all his glory (I wish). So.....a) I love the image created by the writer and b) I *know* how Doyle feels and I feel *for* him (And I don’t think *that* many writers have mentioned that part of Bodie’s anatomy - his beautiful arms?) So, along with Doyle, the sheer sexyness of Bodie - and the story itself - seduced me.

And another magical moment, one of the most moving, final scenes that I've read and I know Firlefanzine's already quoted this but you can never have too much of a good thing:

"I want to remember forever this moment in my lifetime when we shared love. I'll always have the memory for the empty years ahead, with hollow laughter and creeping numbness. Whatever happens from here, I want to cling to this feeling, overflowing with loveliness and undeniably real, to store it away inside with a warm glow and no bitterness.”

So, despite the story’s imperfections, the numerous magical moments were enough for me and I loved Gravity's Angel.

Another reason why I like this story is because, like the Bodie in Welcome to the Jungle, the writer depicts him as a hard, tough, man of mystery which is my favourite kind of Bodie. No surprise there.