For the Man Who Has Everything
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| Fanfiction | |
|---|---|
| Title: | For the Man Who Has Everything |
| Author(s): | Lezlie Shell |
| Date(s): | 1982, 1983 |
| Length: | |
| Genre(s): | slash |
| Fandom(s): | Star Trek: TOS |
| Relationship(s): | Kirk/Spock |
| External Links: | For the Man Who Has Everything |
Click here for related articles on Fanlore. | |
For the Man Who Has Everything is a K/S story by Lezlie Shell.
It was published in the print zine The Best Little K/Smas Zine in Texas (1982), then in 1983 in Out of Bounds Overflow.
This story was nominated for a 1984 K/Star Award for Best Humor.
Summary
"Unable to find a Christmas gift for Spock, Kirk finally decides on “anything” Vulcan."
Reactions and Reviews
1998
This story had me crying from laughing, feeling sorry for poor sex-crazed Spock after he smashed his C'Lemnin, and cheering for Kirk who managed to keep his mouth shut and let Spock seal their relationship. Kirk gives up trying to find the perfect Christmas present for Spock and gets him the first Vulcan thing he finds. It turns out not to be a vase, but a receptacle so that Vulcan males may pleasure themselves without growing hair on their palms, etc. (So funny). Giving it to another is a ritualistic way to ask to be kidnapped for bonding. Spock contemplates Kirk as a mate and decides he likes the idea, but it takes months to implement the kidnapping. In that time Spock gets progressively more sexually needy, while Kirk has no idea what is going on. Spock finally manages to have Kirk kidnapped and begins there relationship in a sexy, but hilarious scene. I want to read more like this. [1]
This is one of the most hilarious stories ever! Poor hapless Kirk wants so much to get Spock a good Christmas present and he discovers a Vulcan artifact that he knows nothing about. He impulsively buys it for Spock. Kirk can only guess that it's some sort of vase when he gives it to Spock for Christmas. And since he doesn't stay around for the opening, he doesn't find out that Spock recognizes it as an ancient ceremonial item meant to be used for Vulcan masturbation. By this point, I was on the floor with laughter especially with the formal footnote to indicate that Vulcans weren't supposed to masturbate with their hands because flesh upon flesh could make them go blind! Anyway, the events get completely out of control as Spock has Kirk kidnapped as part of the ceremony and then ties him up in order to have his way with him! Everything in this story is so funny—and most of the humor comes from the exact characterizations, especially of Spock, who so logically pursues this course of action and ends up doing such outrageous things in the most deadpan manner! One totally terrific story—definitely for those who think they don't care for humorous K/S. This will win you over. [2]
2020
This was so funny and I loved Spock being smitten! [3]
Fifteen minutes later and I am still laughing at the last line. Well done!! [4]
Oh, my goodness. I haven’t giggled this hard in a looongg time! Very clever. [5]
My god this is the funniest k/s i've ever read! [6]
Still funny 37 years on! [7]
References
- ^ from The K/S Press #18
- ^ from The K/S Press #23
- ^ from TheBiFromUNCLE at Archive of Our Own (29 Apr 2020)
- ^ from Waterfall at Archive of Our Own (30 Apr 2020)
- ^ from chantrea at Archive of Our Own (29 Apr 2020)
- ^ from Kalpana at Archive of Our Own (29 Apr 2020)
- ^ from Trekker at Archive of Our Own (30 Apr 2020)