The Cook, The Captain, His Lover and The Gourmet

Fanfiction
Title:	The Cook, The Captain, His Lover and The Gourmet
Author(s):	Eva Stuart
Date(s):	1997
Length:
Genre(s):	slash
Fandom(s):	Star Trek: TOS
Relationship(s):	Kirk/Spock
External Links:
Click here for related articles on Fanlore.

The Cook, The Captain, His Lover and The Gourmet is a Kirk/Spock story by Eva Stuart.

first page

It was published in the print zine Heroes in the Wilderness.

Summary

"Murder, mayhem and haute cuisine on the Enterprise. Who killed the Armelian Ambassador? Who laid McCoy out in Sickbay? Can Kirk find the killer in time to prevent diplomatic disaster? How much chocolate cake can a Vulcan eat?"

Reactions and Reviews

1997

The Enterprise is assigned to take an Ambassador back home. Well - we all know that carrying Ambassadors is not our favourite captain's favourite mission. This one, though, is a hedonist, and is more than charmed when Nogura's personal cook - who is also on board - prepares a gourmet dinner for the diplomatic party and the senior officers. To say more would give away too much of the plot, but the story is cleverly put together and has a twist of a kind that I personally hadn't come across before. The K/S element is minimal, but that is often the case with Village Press stories; it's there in the background, a detail that is part of the private lives of Kirk and Spock, and the story doesn't suffer because it's in the background.

A clever title for a clever story!

This well-written tale involves a mission to take the ambassador of a planet newly accepted into the Federation back to his homeworld. Along for the trip is Nogura’s personal chef, called simply “the Cook.” Add some foreign intrigue, a dash of poison and an autopsy thwarted by one sick doctor, and you have the recipe for a class-A mystery.

The characterization of the Cook is especially well done. Part of the story is told from her POV in the form of her personal log as she prepares a special dinner for the ship’s captain and first officer. I loved the way she addresses the computer when requisitioning some chocolate to tempt Spock’s sweet tooth: “No I don’t know the location code. You find it, you’re the computer.” The fact that she seems to know more about Kirk and Spock’s relationship than is commonly known is never explained, but serves to add an additional piece to the puzzle. Whomever she is, it seems evident she is not “merely” a cook. A truly believable and unique character. It’s not often we find an intelligent, fully fleshed-out female character in fanfic that doesn’t lust after one of our heroes.

There is no sex scene, just a few veiled references to the long-time relationship that exists between Kirk and Spock. Rather we see their love and regard for each other revealed in knowing looks, soft smiles and an excellent working partnership.

Very cleanly written. I always appreciate that. The only typo that caught my eye was the use of “chose” when “choose” was required.

The ending provided a lovely twist to a thoroughly enjoyable story.

I definitely intend to locate and read more of this author’s work.

The first thing to love about this story is the title. I started smiling even before I read the first sentence. This story strikes me as being different from others by Eva Stuart, that she’s published probably over more years than she wants us to remember. It’s funny, and there’s a cute mystery at the heart of it, and of course it’s as well written as always. Although I must confess I had the mystery figured out before it was revealed. One of the same clues that struck our resident Vulcan also struck me almost as soon as I read it, and so I waited to see not only if I were right, but if the Enterprise fellows would catch on as I thought I had. Naturally, they do. But in all, a cleverly laid mystery.

I also emerged from this story with a definite feeling of culinary inferiority. I’m hoping that this is a cultural difference between Americans and the English, but I didn’t know what a great many of the dishes served by the Cook were, and I’m not talking the Klingon Squushi, either. (Although the “Seafood Sinclair” cited on page 5 definitely caught my eye, and surely must be delicious.) Chips and red sauce and chicken enchiladas are more my American Southwest style.

I liked the opening two scenes, with Kirk angry over orders from Komack, and then the Cook giving him a way to turn it all on its head. That’s my opportunistic captain.

I liked the description of the Armelians, especially the bit about them not being distinguishable, one from the other, by individuals of other species.

The ending was perhaps a bit convenient. Kirk basically depends upon the role of publicity, and the Armelians’ reaction to it, to allow him to establish the “ambassador.” To do that the author must establish two things within the story: one, that the Armelians have a culture similar enough to our own that the media/press wields the same sort of power, and two, the power of the press, period. The author has written another story/stories where the media play a role, but I didn’t think this particular story supported that role, it was simply assumed. And with the Enterprise’s ignorance of Armelian society/culture, our captain was taking a huge chance at the end, assuming that the Armelians wouldn’t tear the chameleon apart with their bare hands, press or no press.

But this is a really minor quibble in a story that’s just meant for fun, I think.

Although, another quibble. While in no way did this story require sex, it would have been enhanced for me if sex had been a part of it. The following was tantalizing!

“It would be a waste,” Spock said austerely. “Food and sex both require one’s undivided attention.” And he applied himself to the former with as much enthusiasm as, an hour later, he did to the latter. Although I definitely liked the last sentence of the story, very much. One of the most marvelous ways to imply a kiss that I’ve read, and I could really see it.

And, I would like to know the author’s secret, how to write K/S on 950 calories a day. She’s a miracle-worker!

I appreciated and enjoyed the borrowing of the title from the very controversial film of some years back.

Although basically a well-written story of the murder-mystery genre, its K/S is completely incidental.

I enjoyed all the neat, wonderful focus and attention on the food and drink. I loved the chocolate and Spock and how various dishes were prepared, along with the totally adorable recipes and the very clever menu.

Some really terrific writing; "Smooth and unctuous as sauce Alfredo, Kirk slid into the breech."

Fun. Not K/S, but fun.