Reason's Way

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K/S Fanfiction
Title: Reason's Way
Author(s): DVS
Date(s): 1986
Length:
Genre: slash
Fandom: Star Trek: The Original Series
External Links:

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Reason's Way is a Kirk/Spock story by DVS.

It was published in the print zine Consort #2.

Summary

"Every time Kirk gets drunk he proclaims his love for Spock but forgets about it after sobering up."

Reactions and Reviews

Kirk gets drunk a lot and each time professes his love and lust for Spock. Then the next morning, he forgets it all McCoy gives Kirk a drug to help him remember after he saw a tape of Kirk getting drunk. When McCoy confronts Spock with what's going onf he asks: " 'Have you ever fucked him?" Perhaps the good doctor might have put the question a tad more diplomatically.

The excellent premise is that Kirk's forgetting comes from like aftereffects of Spock's helping him to forget Rayna. Boo, hiss... another of those times when McCoy knows what neither of them knows and has to tell them.

A minor strangeness was Spock's explanation of why he can't have a relationship with Kirk because a warrior bond on Vulcan is considered "perverse". But I liked that Spock doesn't think Kirk can be faithful.

Excellent scene of Spock melding with Kirk in McCoy's office to remove the "forget". Then appropriately heartrending when they are distant with each other.

Kirk gets drunk again and goes to Spock's cabin in a very poignant scene as he rambles on about how impossible it is that Spock would love him. And I adored the touch of humor when Kirk says "cauliflower" instead of "kolinahr."

More beautiful stuff while Spock watches a sleeping Kirk and realizes he wants to bond. Except another strangeness when Kirk wakes up and Spock takes off his clothes to show him what he is. That would be a good scene except it was so abrupt It was like "Oh, you woke up and I'll take off my clothes".

Kirk says: "I have to go to the bathroom." (Hey. There's a romantic line if I ever heard one) and gets some toothpaste (what is it with all this toothpaste business?) because he wants to kiss Spock, but his "mouth tastes like the bottom of a swamp". That or Kirk. What a romantic guy!

But what a beautiful moment when Spock tells Kirk he loves him. So. overall, a very good story. [1]
This is the most interesting D.V.S. story that I've seen. In too many stories Spock tampers with Kirk's mind and there are no adverse consequences. In this one there are such consequences, which brings the matter before us from an ethical perspective. I also liked the way D.V.S. handled the issue of Vulcan opposition to K/S, and Spock's reaction to it. [2]
This story has long been a particular favorite of mine and one I repeatedly get out of the pile to reread. The zine was published in 1986 so I‘m going to be a bit free with details. It‘s based on an unusual, yet—you should pardon the expression—logical premise that I‘ve never seen before or since. The story opens with Spock entering a room and being immediately kissed by Kirk. It seems a party is going on and a tipsy Kirk has been dared by his assembled crew to kiss the next person to walk in the door. Needless to say, this doesn‘t sit well with the first officer. He leaves, very embarrassed amid great whoops of laughter and cheers. (Now I will admit that I don‘t for a moment believe that Kirk would let himself get in that condition while aboard his ship or allow his crew to see him that way, but if you can get past this inconsistency the rest of the story flows as smooth as silk.)

When Kirk catches up with the Vulcan outside his quarters, he offers him half of his winnings, and makes a clumsy pass. Spock takes his inebriated captain back to Kirk‘s quarters and sees him safely to bed.

McCoy becomes alerted when Security provides him with tapes of Kirk. Yes tapes, for this is only one incident of several. It seems when the captain gets drunk he tries to seduce Spock. He never remembers the incidents the next day, and Spock is in agony. The Vulcan has fallen in love with his captain and is crushed that he can‘t forget the smallest detail of the attempted seductions while Kirk remembers nothing. Spock‘s heartache is excruciating.

Kirk refuses to believe what he‘s been doing until he sees the actual tapes. The results of his therapy session with McCoy reveal his hidden love for the Vulcan.

It seems that Spock created the problem when he melded with Kirk to ease his pain over Rayna‘s death. Now when Kirk‘s inhibitions are lowered by alcohol, when he feels love for Spock, he ―forgets it.

When McCoy confronts Spock, the Vulcan informs the doctor that should he choose a homosexual life style with Kirk, he would be forever barred from his native world. He could not go home again. Add to that of course, he would be putting Kirk‘s life at risk during pon farr. I love that McCoy carries on an entire conversation with Spock‘s back, the result of which is Spock must return to Kirk‘s mind and undo the damage he has caused.

This very talented author takes the story to an eminently satisfactory conclusion. Oh, how I wish she were still writing K/S.

Dig out this zine, if you have it, and give yourself a treat after a busy holiday season. [3]
I love how the story uses the events from "Requiem for Methuselah," and creates a plausible consequence for them. It's a truly lovely and well-written story from a prolific and wonderful writer.

Kirk's drunk. Not just tipsy, but full-blown four sheets to the wind. He'd have to be to kiss Spock in front of a crowd of crew members, even if it was on a bet. Still, getting drunk and making advances to his first officer isn't normal behavior for Kirk, or hadn't been. But now every few months Kirk gets drunk and comes on to Spock—and then promptly forgets about it the next morning. After noticing something odd about Kirk's behavior at a party, McCoy sets up to have his captain's movements recorded. Kirk is stunned when confronted with the evidence and furious when McCoy insists on therapy in order to figure out what's going on with Kirk. He drugs Kirk and hooks him up to be monitored and what he finds makes him furious. Mystified as to why Kirk seems detached from any memories of love, he discovers Spock's tampering with Kirk's memories after Rayna's 'death.' Somehow, Kirk's brain has figured out how to tap into that experience in order to forget any time that love causes pain. And since as far as Kirk is concerned his love for Spock is unrequited, he drinks to release his inhibitions, if only for a little while, and then forgets what he's done. McCoy takes the information to Spock and insists that Spock undo the damage. Spock agrees, but then informs the doctor that he will be leaving the ship. What he feels for Kirk he considers as going against everything that makes him Vulcan. He plans to return to Vulcan and attempt the Kolinahr. McCoy tries to dissuade him, but Spock stands firm. All the doctor can do is insist that Spock go to Kirk and undo the damage. After it's done, the men each go their own way. That night, Kirk once again comes to Spock's cabin after getting drunk. But this time it's more of a goodbye. Kirk's been thinking and he's come to the conclusion that Spock doesn't love him enough to love him; what Vulcan would think is more important. Spock loves him, but he loves himself more. I love that Kirk has seen the fallacy behind Spock's logic. I've always thought the whole 'leaving Starfleet and going to Gol,' no matter what the reason, as about the most selfish and self-centered thing Spock could ever do. And I don't think of Spock as being selfish and self-centered. But what Kirk has said has started Spock thinking, so after putting Kirk to bed, Spock mulls over what both Kirk and McCoy have said to him. He realizes that just as there are logical reasons for going, there are logical reasons for staying. And he loves Kirk.

When Kirk awakens, Spock tells him of his decision. Their first priority is to make love—they'll set McCoy's mind at rest later. [4]

References

  1. from The K/S Press #4
  2. from The LOC Connection #9
  3. from The K/S Press #77
  4. by Gilda F from The K/S Press #175