Poison Apples

The Professionals Fanfiction
Title:	Poison Apples series
Author(s):	Pam Rose and then two sequels
Date(s):	1985, then 1991 and 1992
Length:
Genre:
Fandom:	The Professionals
External Links:	"Poison Apples" online here
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Poison Apples is a Professionals story by Pam Rose.

It is based on the movie, "The Wicker Man."

"Poison Apples" was printed in In the Public Interest #1 and then later released to the circuit library.

A version that was rewritten and edited from the original version is now on Archive of Our Own.

Responsefics

It was followed by two stories, each written by a different author.

Apples for the Lady was written by TD Murphy and published in In the Public Interest #3.

The third story is Antidote to Apples written by Kris Brown and published in Compounded Interest #1.

Summary

Poison Apples is often referred to as a fusion story and is based on the book and the film The Wicker Man by Anthony Shafer. In the story, Bodie has an argument with Doyle and to cool things off, Cowley sends Bodie alone to Summerisle island to look into the disappearance of a friend's son. The people on the island live a seemingly bucolic life worshiping pre-Christian gods and living without modern technology (no electricity, phones etc.) When Bodie submits his resignation, Cowley forbids Doyle from investigating. Doyle disobeys and travels to the island to discover a seemingly brainwashed Bodie, happy to live amongst the islanders. Doyle manages to break through Bodie's haze to learn that Bodie is in love with him and that his unrequited feelings made him more susceptible to the islanders. They flee, but even as they consummate their sexual relationship, the island will not let them go and they are re-captured and separated. Doyle is then led to a bizarre fertility ritual where a drugged Bode is being used to impregnate the island women to help reduce the number of birth defects brought on by inbreeding. At the end of the breeding ceremonies, the islanders plan to burn Bodie as a sacrifice. Doyle and Bodie escape by swimming away from the island, but as they look back they learn a horrible truth. Poison Apples can be read at the online circuit library here.

Fan Comments

Unknown Date

I hated the ending of the second [Apples for the Lady] and disliked the mumbo jumbo with Cowley and the Bodie as Cowley's son emphasis - I really can't see where on earth that comes from and it annoys the hell out of me! .

1993

I did have a lovely time reading "Poison Apples" (a 68-pg story by Pam Rose, for those of you still in the dark), in which B&D end up on an isolated Scottish island inhabited by a mysterious group of paganistic folk. Sex, drugs, rock'n'roll--oh, wait, no--just the first two. And Doyle bursts his appendix at the beginning, too! And B&D have a tiff! Oh, dear--angst. I was able to handle the tension and angst--it was very nicely done. Actually, I had more trouble handling the Female that Bodie gets temporarily entangled with. Anybody else out there dislike reading heterosex scenes that pop up in the middle of their slash? I have often enjoyed the occasional threesome, provided the woman in question quietly disappears at an appropriate moment, leaving the Lads to each other. And I don't mind the temporary appearance of a current or past girlfriend, but I don't particularly care for detailed sex scenes that are solely between one of the Lads and a woman, even if I do know they're not going to stay together. But then, we all know how nitpicky I am.

2004

One recurring theme in Pros fiction is that of Bodie's silent, dogged devotion to an oftentimes clueless (and sometimes needlessly insensitive) Ray Doyle. That devotion is certainly canonical - witness Bodie's unrequested guarding of Ray through the night in Hunter, Hunted, his matter-of-fact defiance of Cowley's orders in order to rescue his partner in Ojuka - and this story uses that premise to take the reader on a bumpy ride right into horror-story land. No doubt about it, Poison Apples is a creepy tale. It's based on a book I've never read and a consequent movie I've never seen, but neither is required to feel the terror as it slowly unfolds within the context of The Professionals.

The narrative begins innocuously enough - the Lads are on an op and Ray is sick. All signs of concern from Bodie are bluntly, even rudely rejected. Ray knows he's being a bastard but as it turns out, he really is ill, enough to land him in the hospital. That leaves Bodie at loose ends and anxious to take a break from his obstreperous partner. He embarks on a mission as a favor to Cowley, looking into the disappearance of the son of an old friend. Glad for the distraction, Bodie heads for a Scottish island in search of the young man - but when Bodie himself turns up missing, it's up to Ray to go after him.

There are two stories at work here - the main plot that contains the horror story thread that endures right up to the very last scene - but also the changing dynamics of Ray and Bodie's relationship. How Bodie feels about Ray is evident from the beginning; it's Doyle who has to grow, ultimately realizing that not only does he have to fight for Bodie's life, but for the right to retain the place he's earned in Bodie's heart.

Poison Apples also carries on a Pros theme that I've always enjoyed - that of the Very Dangerous Bodie. He's charming, he's handsome, he's egotistical, he's forever amusing himself (and Doyle, for that matter), but there is an underlying savagery that is best expressed when Doyle is threatened. If that side of Bodie floats your boat, you'll enjoy this story even more.

2012

The first time I read the story, I thought it was okay, and it's a perfectly readable story, but having watched the original film... I'm rather disappointed this time. There's actually a lot of potential for good Pros-y cross-over: in the film the "baddies" are ambiguously bad - why shouldn't they celebrate a different religion that encourages happiness rather than misery? - and they're smart, a good match for CI5 rather than the ordinary police. I thought the story really started promisingly, taking advantage of this, but then fell somewhat into fanfic-cliches. I wasn't entirely happy with the characterisation either. Doyle in particular is a wee bit pathetic in this story, compared to Bodie.....It all bothers me a bit, to be honest...I can see where someone might want to write a sequel, too - it feels a bit unfinished to me, and I'm someone who rather likes ambiguous endings.

Fusion or crossover? Well, there's huge use of - and extrapolation from - the film. ...I don't know whether it's a fusion or a crossover in the end. I think if it had been a fusion, I might have expected more of the nonsense with the hobby horse and the rest scurrying down little back streets. In fact, I was waiting for that all the way through. Overall, I think it started off slowly, I enjoyed it much more in the final third, and I really did like the final lines, which is where I think it really fused with the original: the details are different, but the shock is the same.

I respect Pamela Rose for her Arabian Nights (which, as I've blabbed elsewhere, is actually a fairly close retelling of what are probably Rudolp Valentino's two most famous movies). And I find that with some stories, I get into reading and stop thinking about them critically. (Sometimes. :D) This was one of those.

...That said, I think a lot of the comments hit the nail on the head. Doyle's a bit on the "delicate" side (it didn't help that I'd *just* read a story where he - well, they both were a shade weepy). Not unforgivably so (i.e., I've read worse); bits of what makes him Doyle are in the story. But it's undeniably there....

But that ending - that ending! That is the most powerful part of the story, and I like the concept. It *is* a good idea. But when all is said and done, it really has nothing to do with Pros, and it really only works the first time you read it.

Looking back at Arabian Nights - I may like it (it's the first or second story I read in the fandom), but it shares the same trait of not being very Pros-y. I just liked it better because of how familiar I am with the other source.

it was only when I was a few pages in that I thought, "Oh, it's this one!" and dithered about carrying on, because quite honestly... it's not really my cup of tea.

I have heard of the film but was determined not to watch it (I never watch anything labelled 'horror'), but I knew the premise. On that level, the fic worked well enough. Again, it was the characterisations that gave me issues. I agree with everything you've mentioned - but most of all the tears! Perhaps I need to learn to separate lads-from-eps and lads-from-fic. I dunno, though, because there are some stories where one of them (usually Doyle) cries, and it's okay for me - and if I count things like Klansmen, that doesn't bother me at all. Hmmm, perhaps it is the general uselessness of Doyle in this one.

I liked Lord Summerisle - he was nicely menacing. I enjoyed the writing. I was prepared to suspend disbelief about special apples (which I thought prefered a coolish climate) and warm islands, because, y'know, Gulf Stream - okay. American cider... okay. But it has to come back to characterisation and a bit of a lack of banter, for me.

I came to this one early on in my Pros plunge. I was not a fan of AUs nor of crossovers. But I know The Wicker Man very, very well. It was very much a rite of passage in my circles of friends to watch it and discover what all the fuss was about. And, having found out, we in turn always said 'you'll have to watch it yourself' to others. I remember watching the faces of friends as they watched it for the first time, and they really didn't know what was coming. And I do think the ending of Poison Apples manages to echo the shock brilliantly.

I think my reaction on re-reading Poison Apples was very similar to my reaction the first time. Both times, I found it very, very hard to get into. The scene where Cowley briefs Bodie is full of very non-British speech and ideas - "majors" at university (and I'm not sure that UK university ideas of anthropology are the same as US), undergraduates who have lined up fellowships as soon as they graduate and did theses "last spring", talk of physicians and vacationing (doctors and going on holiday), all the sort of stuff that, if you're interested and involved, you can merrily ignore, but if you're getting bogged down, they really stand out. Both times, I got far enough to think that I should continue: the first time because all of Pros was new to me and I wanted to see how this was going to work out - and at least I knew what The Wicker Man was about, unlike the source material for 90% of the crossovers and fusions; and the second time because of the Reading Room. And both times, as soon as Lord Summerisle gets involved, I started to get much, much more interested. Pam Rose is wildly erratic with the lads' dialogue (some is great, though - in the same briefing scene, I loved the "I didn't require a taste test" "Just digesting the facts, sir" exchange - although now I look at it in isolation, it's more Bond film-like, really), but she got Summerisle perfectly. She managed to find separate pieces of story and plot for both lads, too. I thought it would simply be a matter of Doyle turning up and trying to rescue a reluctant Bodie, but instead Doyle finds he is also in demand, if for slightly different reasons.

I enjoyed the sex scenes (but when did I not?) and I didn't notice the "instinctive" thing (although I did wonder at Willow straddling the bathtub. What? Ow). I enjoyed Bodie thinking "what am I doing here?" and Doyle thinking "what does Summerisle want?", but while they were separate, I found it all a bit slow. Once they are on the run together, I was much more involved, somehow.

I've read other Pamela Rose stories, and I tend to find the same: the story is involved enough for me to enjoy that, as a story, and to forget that this is supposed to be Bodie and Doyle of the Professionals here. I am in the minority who just don't 'get' Professional Dreamer, and I enjoy Arabian Nights right up until any moment when I am reminded that this is supposed to be Bodie the cool ex-merc and Doyle the hard-nosed ex-copper. This one is a CI5 one, and I still get jolted when I realise this is supposed to be the Bodie and Doyle I imagine.

I tend to find the same: the story is involved enough for me to enjoy that, as a story, and to forget that this is supposed to be Bodie and Doyle of the Professionals here If I "forget" that the characters of a story are Bodie and Doyle, then I don't see any point in continuing to read - so I don't. *g* I'm reading Pros very specifically to read about the lads I see in the eps, and there's very few stories where I've lost their characterisation altogether, and still been able to keep reading. It doesn't have to be overt characterisation (I really don't want to hear all about their green and blue eyes and so on *g*) but they have to have a spark that makes them my lads... For me, although there's mischaracterisation in Professional Dreamer (well, not so much mis- because it's not supposed to be them to start with *g*) and Arabian Nights, there's enough of them there to keep me interested in Bodie and Doyle. I couldn't say the same of... oh, something like Unfinished Melody by Jane, for example. I always wish Pam Rose had had a good Brit-check, though! *g*

I nearly didn't read it because although I've watched The Wicker Man twice (involuntarily the second time), I really do find it absolute horror and it gives me nightmares, so I was almost scared to read. But I'd expressed hatred of Jane Eyre last week and I like the discussions so I told myself not to be silly.

I agree with all your criticisms of the story as a Pros story. However, as an adventure/fusion story I absolutely loved it. I think the same applied when I read Arabian Nights - I couldn't really see Bodie and Doyle at all but I adored the story.

At the beginning of this I was so worried that it was going to be a major-character-death fic in a horror story that I was skimming and fretting and not really noticing things like Americanisms because I wasn't totally on board anyway. I got really intrigued on the island, perhaps because of the fusion/whatver it is - it helped me to come to terms with the film (I haven't read the book), and perhaps because despite the need for a Brit checker it's really very well written. Later, when they were on the run I was just enjoying the story and not caring about who these guys were. Then, just as I thought we were going to break faith with the film, there was the shock at the end. But because I was identifying with our heroes (though they weren't really heroes here...)the shock was muted and not as bad as the film.

I will definitely re-read it, but thinking of it as, if not original fic, perhaps as Wicker Man fic, with MS and LC cast in the roles of the protagonists. So thanks for an introduction to a story I really (eventually) enjoyed and found memorable - even if it isn't quite Pros.

Okay, I'm starting to see the building of a myth about these stories... *g* In an October 2002 ProsLib discussion of Poison Apples and its sequels, someone who hasn't read the stories for themselves remembers a discussion on a CI5 list, the gist of which was that the sequel tries to fix the slash relationship by making B/D het, and denying that the slash relationship in PA existed. This memory of a discussion is confirmed as being accurate to the sequel by someone who had read the stories - but I notice that she's not a native speaker of English. These descriptions of the sequel are then accepted by two other people. Now - I have rather an issue with this, because the descriptions aren't accurate (which I presume may have been part of the original discussion, not ventured into in the brief 2002 discussion, because only one of the discussants had read the stories at that stage!) In fact both characters are not made het at the end of the sequel - Bodie is very much still pining for Doyle. Nor is the existence of the slash relationship denied, as in fact Doyle starts to remember it just before the end, though he lets the memory go somewhat in the last paragraph - but there's a definite suggestion that the memory of it all hasn't been as forgotten as Bodie thinks it has. So...

...aah, but happily the discussion continues [ProsLib discussion] with someone who has read the story - and interpreted the ending in the same way that I did, but also notes that the woman Doyle is fancying looks alot like Bodie (and Doyle notices this at the end). Someone in the discussion wonders whether the author claimed it to be anti-slash, it's noted that there is no such claim made in the zine (or even that it was a sequel to Poison Applies) - *checks zine - quite right on both counts* The discussion veers off to other stories, then. Okay, then there's a 2008 discussion [at [ProsLib discussion] (scroll to about halfway down) where the middle story is claimed to be "a het version" by various people who haven't read it, following its description as "countering" the slash version. It's noted that the titles reflect the move from slash to het to slash again (I don't think they do though - see above!) Someone then decides to "skip" the middle story on the basis that it's het/anti-slash... and then the discussion goes back to Poison Apples itself, and thus a myth continues, and people avoid reading a story! Wow - such fascinating stuff, the creation of fandom myth and legend! And death to some fics, but not others.... It was noted, for example, that whilst neither sequel is as well-written as the first one, the third sequel is the least well written - and yet the second is the one that people refuse to read! I think this might deserve a post of its own, you know... *g*

2023

I've not read this for a long time, but remember enjoying it. I must re-read your newly-edited version!

I'm currently going through the UK paper circuit library collection, and came across a copy of your story. It has an additional line at the end, which isn't on any of the other versions I've seen (at the Circuit Archive, and on ProsLib). It reads: Numbly, Bodie started the motor again, and turned the boat away from the island of Summerisle. I must admit that I rather like it as giving a slight closure to the horror, and I wondered if it had been purposefully left off versions for the dramatic impact, or...? Hope you don't mind me asking here!

Thank you! When we were prepping her stories for uploading I don't think Pam had a copy of the original circuit version. She lost a lot of zines and papers in a flood. You're right. It is a really effective final line. I took the liberty of adding it.