One Tin Soldier (Star Trek: TOS story)

K/S Fanfiction
Title:	One Tin Soldier
Author(s):	Ciana Mitchell
Date(s):	1990
Length:
Genre:	slash
Fandom:	Star Trek: The Original Series
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One Tin Soldier is a Kirk/Spock story by Ciana Mitchell.

It was published in the print zine First Time #27.

Summary

"Kirk is raped and tortured, and unable to deal with the trauma, finds himself avoiding touch and tempting fate while old memories surface of a previous violation."

Excerpt

"He forced himself to sit up. The stone wall felt cold against his sore back. Every muscle ached, every limb was covered with bruises. His hair was matted with dirt and stiff with dried blood. Since the last beating, the pounding in his head had not stopped."

Reactions and Reviews

I am a fan of the stories by Ciana M., and there’s one of her stories in First Time 27: “One Tin Soldier.” Ciana always has a lovely touch in her work, a delicacy that is very appealing to me. Here she tackles the subject of rape when Kirk is held prisoner. He is rescued, but he has a lot of healing to do before he can get over how he was assaulted. I really appreciate this story because Kirk doesn’t have instant healing; the story is realistic in the emotional trauma he suffers. There are some lovely, intimate scenes between captain and first officer that have no sex, even no touching to them at all, but the words spoken by each of them tell of the deepest love. And regard and respect.

This novella about Kirk recovering from rape by his kidnappers — as well as dealing with a repressed childhood memory of molestation -- is one of the most enjoyable (if it's possible to apply that term to this subject matter) reads that I've had the pleasure to come across on this over-worn theme. First of all, the reader isn't subjected to the rape when Kirk experiences it, and it is never hashed in great detail. Instead, this story focuses on the slow healing, stressing the friendship between Kirk, Spock, and McCoy, while at the same time delicately introducing a first time situation between K/S. In short, this is a heart-warming read. In fact, it's the only 'rape' story I can think of that I would recommend to those new to K/S. This stresses the love between the characters, not the lust. It is also one of the few rape recovery stories that takes place almost completely on the Enterprise; i.e., it doesn't fall back on the common scenario of having Kirk, Spock and/or McCoy go off on medical leave in the woods somewhere. As much as I liked the tone, smooth writing, and characterizations of this novella, I do have a few tiny nit-picks. The first is that while I'm one who loves emphasis on the friendship aspect of K/S, I do think the word 'friend' was a bit over-used. I can understand that, in Kirk's situation, he needed to keep reminding himself what wonderful friends he had, but all those reminders got mildly tedious, at least for this reader. Also, the author was doing such a great job of having Kirk's recovery go so slowly — i.e., his hesitation to have sex with Spock— that I was a little puzzled that in the last few pages Kirk went from deciding he could perfom tactile sex to thinking that he wouldn't mind if Spock wanted to take him while they were showering the following morning. I couldn't believe his hesitation would have disappeared completely. All in all, a marvelous story and I do hope this author intends to be more prolific in the future.

A marvelous story of healing without rush or the solution that K/S can cure all ills, except insofar as the friendship aspect of that relationship. Kirk in his bewilderment and pain was well drawn while still demonstrating the basic strength the rape was unable to break. Spock was, by necessity, a more complex study- whole-heartedly offering whatever Kirk could accept from him while holding his own needs and emotions at bay. It is believable that he would bend, even break, Starfieet regulations for the sake of his friend. Even his extreme patience with Kirk rang true. Going off and allowing Spock, an untrained layman, to step into his shoes, for me strained my concept of him. It is not, after all, impossible to rearrange appointments, even in the military. However, no nitpicks can distract from ay overall enjoyment of this gentle and well-written story.

Hurt/comfort stories are not always my favorites because I am squeamish about the boys getting hurt. One Tin Soldier is a hurt/comfort story I was able to really enjoy, because the actual physical hurt is off stage. We are only told what happened, rather than being there in real time as the abuse occurs. Being a wimp, I can deal with the hurt in h/c stories a lot better with this type of format!

One Tin Soldier opens with Kirk in a cell, beaten and abused. His physical ordeal is about to end as Spock rescues him and they beam back to the Enterprise. We soon learn that during a diplomatic mission Kirk had been abducted, and was missing for four weeks. We also learn from McCoy that Kirk had been repeatedly raped. McCoy tells no one, and although he urges counseling for Kirk, reluctantly agrees to let Kirk try to handle it on his own. Spock has sensed from the beginning that something was different about Kirk’s injuries this time. He noticed that Kirk had seemed despairing and bitter in sickbay, rather than displaying his usual positive attitude. Once back on the bridge, he appeared normal to others, but the Vulcan notices Kirk’s subtle avoidance of touch, and a darkness in his mood. Then a series of missions where Kirk recklessly endangers his own life forces McCoy to haul him into his office for what he hopes will be regular counseling sessions. However, McCoy doesn’t force Kirk to talk about his experiences and Kirk is unwilling to open up. The catalyst for Spock finding out what happened is a simple event—Kirk stumbles and is caught by Spock, but twists away from him with a look of rage and revulsion on his face. Later, Spock confronts Kirk in the observation deck and asks for an explanation, which Kirk is not willing to provide. Spock forces the issue, and as he holds Kirk, Spock’s shields slip and he sees the terrible images Kirk has been hiding for weeks. We see in this story how Kirk recovers from his ordeal, which comes to include dealing with long repressed memories of being molested as a child by a man; memories which have surfaced due to the recent trauma. Ciana does a wonderful job of showing Kirk’s slow healing, and all the small steps involved in that process. For example, it takes a while after the revelation in the observation deck for Kirk to discuss with Spock what happened. He isn’t immediately able talk about it even though Spock now knows, and I thought that was realistic. First, Kirk sees that Spock continues to treat him with exactly the same respect, affection and devotion as before, so Kirk is still comfortable with his friend. Then, Spock understands when Kirk doesn’t want to take shore leave on a planet that is similar to the one where he was abducted, and spends the time playing chess with him. Eventually Kirk is able to talk to Spock about his feelings about the rape. However, that doesn’t necessarily mean that all is well. In fact, when Kirk and Spock go to a bar while on shore leave, Kirk violently reacts to a man that propositions him. The slow healing process continues, as Kirk talks more to Spock, is comforted by Spock after nightmares, and finally declares his love for Spock even though he is not ready for a physical relationship yet. Spock’s devotion, friendship, support and love is crucial in the process of Kirk’s coming to terms with what happened to him, and restoring his self confidence and self esteem. Ciana does a wonderful job with her Spock portrayal: Spock’s anguish when he learns of what happened, his determination to help Kirk no matter what it takes, his secret love for Kirk, his joy when he realizes his love is returned, his patience when Kirk declares his love but is not ready yet to consummate it, his care during the eventual love making, and his gift to Kirk that removes the tin soldier imagery of the title with a priceless expression of his love and respect for Kirk. This is a very eloquent Spock, with an almost poetical way of expressing his feelings for Kirk at times, but I liked this portrayal very much. This passage by Spock is one I especially liked: “I grieve with thee for the violence you have suffered on Vlasa. And I mourn for the child’s loss of innocence. For I hold the child and the man very dear. Yet, despite such adversity, you are still my Captain. Still the man I call friend. Still the man I have always admired and respected. You and the child of those many years ago need no longer hold their pain close. You are not alone, for I am here to share. Is that not what defines friendship: to walk besides that friend in the shadows as well as the sunlight?” McCoy’s characterization is wonderful in this story, too. We really see the kind, caring, considerate, and sensitive man that is often hidden under a crusty exterior. He is aching to help Kirk, but Kirk won’t talk to him about what happened. He realizes Kirk is most likely to confide in Spock, and so there are some nice scenes between McCoy and Spock as he tries to make Spock understand what Kirk is feeling and how best to help him.

I highly recommend “One Tin Soldier.“ Kirk’s anguish and healing, McCoy’s caring and compassion, and Spock’s unconditional love and support are so beautifully written that this story remains one of my favorites.