Lexicon (Sentinel story)

Fanfiction
Title:	Lexicon
Author(s):	Hth aka Betty Plotnick
Date(s):	15 July 2005
Length:	8338 words
Genre(s):	Hurt/Comfort, disabilityfic, slash
Fandom(s):	Sentinel
Relationship(s):
External Links:	Lexicon at AO3 Lexicon at bettyp's LiveJournal
Click here for related articles on Fanlore.

Lexicon is a Sentinel story by Hth aka Betty Plotnick.

It was written for ts_ficathons's 2005 "Getting a Sense of Cliches" challenge for the prompt "Hurt/Comfort; Smell". Hth comments in the author's notes: "On reflection, I'm not sure if it's h/c-ish enough to be h/c, and I think I used sound a lot more than I used smell, so as a hurt/comfort story focusing on the sense of smell, I don't quite know what I thought I was doing here."

Author's Comments

In her 2005 year in fic review, Hth names Lexicon "My best story this year", writing:

There's not much in the way of Sentinel fandom anymore, which is kind of a pity, because, man, if I had written this in 1998, would I ever have looked cool doing it! *g* I could not, however, have written this story in 1998. It takes a certain control and restraint as a writer to do a very painful story, let alone one that definitively alters the characters forever, without just spraying pathos everywhere, and I don't think I've had that kind of restraint for very long (I still don't catch it with every story). This is a really intense subject for a love story -- "sickness and health" is easy to say, but how do you really face having to be somebody's caregiver forever, or receiving that kind of care when you're used to being the one who handles other people's problems? I just think it would have been very easy to fuck up, and I don't think I did. It's also a nice challenge for me because sensual detail is always such a chore for me as a writer, and writing from Jim's POV means you can't slack off on it for a second. I just think it's a story I attacked with a certain amount of precision that really makes it click.

She also named the story that year's "Story most tragically underappreciated by the universe, in my opinion", writing: "I got some wonderful feedback on it, but I think a lot of people haven't read it because of how out of fashion the fandom is."

Reactions and Reviews

[...Betty Plotnick's] Sentinel page as of last check had her fine 12-work series “Sixteen Instinctive Behaviors” (which she does intend to complete--hooray!), but not her most recent story, “Lexicon,” written for the ts_ficathons delightful “Getting a Sense of Cliches” opportunity. I have to showcase it here, because I think it is one of the most perfect short stories I have read, on every level: emotional resonance, character development, authenticity of voices, tightness of plotting, beauty and effectiveness of writing. Multiple rereadings have only reinforced this conclusion. Although it doubtless has a particular appeal for TS fans, as one of those post-TSbBS tales we can’t get enough of, I really feel it works equally well as a standalone and would be every bit as powerful for a reader who knew nothing of this fandom.

--Cindershadow, 2005

Because I’m a sucker for a Jim Ellison that is damaged and trying to cope. In this story, set post TSbyBS, Blair has not become a cop and while partnered with a young female detective, Jim is gravely wounded. He suffers a knife wound to the throat and thinks he’s dying when it happens, wishing it was Blair who would be with him in his final moments instead of his new partner. He’s never told Blair how he feels and believes he’ll die without being able to.

Jim doesn’t die, but he still can’t tell Blair how he feels, because his vocal cords were destroyed. He’s retired from the police force and sent home to recuperate. I’ve seen many stories with permanent disability for Blair before, even one where the talkative anthroplogist loses his ability to talk, but you don’t see as much of this thing done with Jim. For my part, I like seeing the characters usually considered tougher suffer. Jim was never overly talkative, but once he loses his voice, he has many regrets over the things he can no longer say.

Hth handles all Jim’s reactions with sentitivity and never makes Jim weak in her story. He’s vulnerable, yes, but there’s a difference in that an writing a character so he’s become weak. [...]

Hth has thought of many little ways that life is hard when you can no longer speak. And though Blair is always there for him, even that is difficult for Jim too. Blair is supportive but the normally loquascious man becomes nearly as quiet as Jim, as though Jim’s lack of speech makes him feel as though he should be silent too. And Jim misses Blair talking as much as he misses being able to talk.

[...] The writing is powerful, full of emotion but not overdone. Even if you shy away from disability fic, I certainly think you should give this great story a try. I wish Hth had written more Sentinel fic, but it’s the only one, though other fandoms are represented on their AO3 page.

--April Valentine at crack_van, 2012