Always (Star Trek: TOS story)
| Fanfiction | |
|---|---|
| Title: | Always |
| Author(s): | The Enigmatic Big Miss Sunbeam |
| Date(s): | 2001 |
| Length: | |
| Genre(s): | K/S |
| Fandom(s): | |
| Relationship(s): | Kirk/Spock |
| External Links: | online here |
Click here for related articles on Fanlore. | |
Always was a Star Trek: TOS K/S story by The Enigmatic Big Miss Sunbeam.
It was first posted at ASCEM.
Reactions and Reviews
This story is used as an example of how the early internet fostered edgier and more experimental K/S fiction:
...one of the top-rated stories in the entire group for 2001 was “Always” a...unique K/S story by The Enigmatic Big Miss Sunbeam.Says Sunbeam: “Jim! “Out of this single lapidary syllable came all of slash as we know it. “Spock said it to Jim Kirk when he discovered Jim was still alive in ‘Amok Time’ with such vivacity and joy (mightily uncharacteristic for a Vulcan) that everyone knew who he was in love with, and that was that, even until this very second.
“My story ‘Always’—which is Spock committing necrophilia with Kirk (as Elvis’s ‘You Were Always on My Mind’ subliminally plays in the background)—is told from Spock’s point of view, and I write him as astounded at his own inability to stop fucking Jim’s body until he finally realizes Jim is dead.
“But I only gave Spock one word to speak as he performed (three times!) his unspeakable act, and that word was ‘Jim!’ my little tribute to where it all began. Now, I know just what you’re thinking, but you’d be wrong! I’m not mad, do you hear me? Not mad, I tell you! I just got to a point in my life when I had no further interest in participating in our cultural Manichaeism which says that eroticism is bad (plus you should pay at least $20 for it) and that no-eroticism is good. Why shouldn’t there be beautiful, intelligent, relationship-based smut which is free to everybody with a telephone line? Thank goodness Treksmut answers that question with an overwhelming affirmative.”
So, yeah, it’s a big Internet with room for everything. Essentially free by now, that came with an upside and a downside. One had to be choosy about what to print in a zine, but not so much on the Internet. It was free; if something was sub-par, so what? Nothing lost. Just move on to the next piece.
And so Kirk/Spock postings burgeoned in quantity with highly variable quality. There was more of everything—which is good, right? But if you believe in Ted Sturgeon’s Law that ninety percent of everything is crud (and what K/S fan is going to ignore anything by Ted?) you might see a little catch. The thing is that while K/S fans are united in one front, we’re all different, and one fan’s ten percent may not overlap much (or at all) with someone else’s—as Sunbeam’s edgy stories demonstrate. The playpen of the Internet proved to be a perfect medium for experimentation, the non-traditional, and niche interests and kinks that might not find a home in zines.[1]
I was practically in tears this time. Spock is so believable, and I really liked your Kirk. Strangely enough, it was the ending where they talk about returning Kirk's remains to the stars which choked me up.I also really liked the way K & S had been talking about doing other guys on the ship -- very true to life (hey, I never met a MSM who was only into one guy, ever), and shows how comfortable they had gotten with each other.
Sunbeam, your writing has always stood out to me as much more true-to-life than most of the writing in the genre (however enjoyable it may be to read). Are you a real queen? (Or are you just doing an incredibly good impression?) Is it impertinant to ask? I've been
wondering since I first read a story of yours. (I think it was called "Soldier's Fortune" or something like that - K&S in a cave, but it's the second time).[2]