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Zac Doesn't Score
| Fanfiction | |
|---|---|
| Title: | Zac Doesn't Score |
| Author(s): | Molly and Megan |
| Date(s): | 2002-2003 |
| Length: | 4 chapters |
| Genre(s): | parody |
| Fandom(s): | Hanson |
| Relationship(s): | |
| External Links: | geocities.com/zacdoesntscore |
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Zac Doesn't Score is an unfinished Hanson fanfic by Molly and Megan. It was written as a reaction to all the cliches the authors felt were rampant in hanfic, including the one referenced in the fic's title. The story attempts to parody hanfic by featuring as many cliches as possible.
The authors provided a list of cliches assembled by alt.fan.hanson, which is as follows:
1. Girl moves in next door to (you guessed it...) Hanson. She falls in love with one, they kiss, they carry on, and they schmooze . . .
2. Ike gets pinned for being "too horny."
3. The Hansons and their girlfriends order pizza.
4. One of the Hansons makes their girlfriend cry.
5. Taylor brings a girl roses.
6. Making out in a movie theater with a lucky Hanson.
7. Tay, singing "I Will Come To You" in a concert, points to his latest girlfriend.
8. Jessica and Avery Hanson play Barbies.
9. Sex scene without detail. It gets cut out.
10. Walker and Diana play no role in the story.
11. Zac is overly-hyper.
12. Girl gazes deeply into Hanson's eyes.
13. Girl randomly bumps into a Hanson at a mall.
14. The Tree-House... enough said.
15. Girl Hanson loves gets in car accident.
16. Dating a Hanson solves all of girl's family, social, and personal problems.
17. Hanson can't tell press about girl, for fear of declining popularity.
18. Naive Taylor asks experienced Isaac about girls/kissing/sex.
19. Taylor dates social outcast.
20. Zac doesn't score.[1]
Also featured on the website is a scan of a printed copy of the fic which appears to feature a genuine signature from the band, which the authors state was obtained on October 15, 2003 in Cincinnati, Ohio.