Proximity Breeds Contretemps
|Title:||Proximity Breeds Contretemps|
|Author(s):||Dana Austin Marsh|
|Length:||17 pages (KaleideScope);|
6383 words (KSArchive)
|Fandom:||Star Trek: The Original Series|
|External Links:||Kirk Spock Archive|
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It was first published in the print zine KaleidoScope #3 (1995).
"Assigned a shared bathroom, Kirk at first has problems with not wanting to interrupt Spock, and then when that is resolved, starts to have problems by becoming aroused by him."
Reactions and Reviews
Kirk and Spock have trouble sharing a bathroom. This delightful, funny story has a great plot, and even more impressively, a great Spock. While I can enjoy a vulnerable Spock who has to be convinced to take what he wants, a Spock who can rationally pursue and attain what he wants gets more points in my book. Why is this easier to do in funny stories than in serious ones? 
Okay, okay, I know this is a light-hearted story. But, I'm still trying to decide how I feel about knowing all there is to know about Kirk's bathroom habits.
Heights of hilarity are attained when Kirk rushes through McCoy's quarters to use his bathroom. And it's a real knee-slapper when Kirk almost puts depilatory on his head.Perhaps this story should have been titled, "Proximity Breeds Incontinence". But, skip all this and go for the scene at the end when Spock seduces Kirk. Wow! 
I'm glad someone finally wrote a story focussing on the situation of Kirk and Spock sharing the bathroom. I've often thought about the odd dynamics of the more public toilet habits men have than women do. It's amusing to think about the male power brokers of this world hanging out at urinals together. I've wondered what the dynamics might be between Kirk and Spock prior to any hint of their being lovers, insofar as nudity in each other's presence, in common toilets or showers in gyms, etc.
So, this is an amusing, then sweet and then sexy story, I like Spock s musing on why Kirk might be observing him—is it the human male competitive nature? Naked, he goes up behind Kirk (with only a towel around his waist and presses against him. Yum. Kirk turns around, the towel drops...and the rest is history.Sweet story. 
The author’s name should have been a giveaway. This lady does humor exceedingly well! If nothing else, you must admit a story concerning Kirk’s difficulties sharing toilet facilities with his first officer is different. As he says as he sweeps past McCoy and into the doctor’s bathroom, “When ya gotta go, ya gotta go.” This isn’t wildly hilarious, it just keeps a smile plastered on your face all the time you’re reading it. First it has nothing to do with love and everything to do with morning bladder syndrome. But gradually and entertainingly, the focus changes. And the problems are on the rise...along with other things. Very inventive and great fun!