Ask The Author: Poisontaster
|Interviews by Fans|
|Title:||Ask the Author: Poisontaster|
|Date(s):||March 21, 2012|
|External Links:||interview is here; reference link|
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The truth is, I'm a weird kind of fangirl. My family is very fannish in and among ourselves, but for most of my life, I didn't really know any other fannish people. I didn't own a computer (or have internet) until 2000, which didn't help, and I spent years writing my own original fiction way before I stumbled into Fandom or fanfic.
The funny thing is, I'd written gay characters, I'd written incest...and neither of those things gave me a moment's pause. But writing fanfic, period, and then writing gay relationships (with or without incest) with other people's characters gave me all kinds of vapors and pearl clutching. All of which seems adorably twee (and more than a little embarassing) at this stage in the game. But that's just how it happened.
I've been trying to think of how to characterize my Supernatural experience specifically. Supernatural (and the attendant RPF) are, I think, my One True Fandom.
That is, there's lots of things I'm fannish about, there's lots of fandoms (in varying degrees of obscurity) that I've written stories in (and will probably continue to do so), but SPN was a perfect storm.
Of me being ready to have that first big fandom experience. Of a show jam-packed with all the things that speak to my creative id-brain, from the actors to the genre to the story to even the music and cinematography. And, then finally, a friend/peer group of REALLY insanely imaginative and talented people to knock around and 'play' with.Being in this fandom not only represents the bulk of my writing life by sheer quantity, but in terms of MONUMENTAL inspiration. I have never written more and I have never written more passionately than I have in this fandom.
Well, it started for me with the actors. I'd loved Jensen in Dark Angel and I'd subsequently followed him to Dawson's Creek and then Smallville; I'd adored Jared in Gilmore Girls and was overjoyed at the prospect of seeing him co-headline a show. The fact that he'd be doing so with Jensen was just....amazing! I was over the moon excited.
And then, going back to my nerdily fannish family, we're HUGE horror buffs and we love supernatural stories. It was pretty routine for us to go to the video store on a Friday night, rent all the Nightmare on Elm Street movies or all the Friday the 13th movies or just 8 or 10 random horror movies and then hole up for the entire weekend, marathonning our way through them. So, not only was I getting these actors that I already knew I loved, I was getting them in a show that fell right in my wheelhouse of interests.
And then, the part that makes the rest of it hold together for me--both pre-air and post--is that, for all the outward trappings, it's a show about family. Two brothers, searching for their missing father.
And then, once I'd started watching, there's a lot in the show itself that speaks to me on a very personal level. I grew up in the Midwest. I was born in Chicago, but I spent a good percentage of my time with my father's family in (very) rural Illinois, and so that blue collar, Midwestern sensibility, the classic car, the classic music, the leather jacket and swagger was straight from the backdrop of my own life. As well, my family was pretty poor and we did a lot of...well, less than ideal living, and moving a lot, often just ahead of eviction. Again, it was mainly within Chicago itself, but I could--did, DO--relate in a really visceral way. With Dean, I saw the part of myself that is the older sibling, the one who had to both raise and protect my younger brother, the one who had to bear an unfair portion of the burden as co-parent at a point in time when you're really too young to be trusted with your own life let alone someone else's; in Sam, I saw the part of myself that DEEPLY resented that life and wanted nothing more than to be and find and live "normal", all the while life itself seemed to be conspiring against any efforts to make it so. ...so really, the show had (somewhat literally) ME written all over it.And in later seasons, there's still that strong bond of family with Sam and Dean, but it's enlarged to encompass my other interest in found family; the family that we make for ourself when we leave the nest and go out in the world. I mean...there's a lot I love about the show and there's a lot to love, but without that interweaving story about family and what it means and what you'll do for family, I don't know that any of this would've held me so enchanted for so long. I mean...it's been EIGHT YEARS, and I was still flopping around on my couch making dolphin noises last night just like it was the first year. I can't say that about too many shows.