If Pricks Could Talk

Fanfiction
Title:	"If Pricks Could Talk" by Big!Bad!Boo, Bunny's favorite appendage
Author(s):	Laura Mason
Date(s):	4 September 2004
Length:	2130 words
Genre(s):	missing scene
Fandom(s):	Mary Renault
Relationship(s):
External Links:	archived on MRF
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"‘If Pricks Could Talk’ by Big!Bad!Boo, Bunny's favorite appendage" is a short story by Laura Mason based on Mary Renault's 1953 novel The Charioteer. Both the original story and its continuation (added to the first post) fill in missing scenes from the latter part of the book.

The story is narrated by Bunny's penis, which has its own particular perspective on events. From the author's note:

This is all oleander9999's fault, for sending me a link to a site advertising Mary Renault's books which also included a listing for La Cazzaria: The Book of the Prick, written in 1525 by Antonio Vignali. That listing is where this title comes from, as well as the whole warped idea.

The first part of the story fills in the details of the encounter between Bunny and Andrew Raynes, when the former goes to the EMS hospital to scout out the territory and decides to out Laurie to Andrew. The second part of the story fills in the details of Bunny's later encounter with Ralph Lanyon who has guessed what happened. (Both incidents are reported briefly in the novel, but without detail.)

Comments

"If Pricks Could Talk" elicited a number of positive comments, including the following:

• "I love this. Absolutely love it. It's so original, and fascinating, and so in character, somehow."—comment by tehta
• "This is just great. Very, very funny and extremely well done. I hope you have plenty more Bad Ideas like this one. :-D"—comment by eveiya
• "For something you call a bad idea, this is excellent - a bit like Mary Renault going all postmodern on us. There's some lovely character exploration in this and personally I think it's dead on, for both Ralph and Bunny."—comment by louiselux