Coming Up for Air

Zine
Title:	Coming Up for Air
Publisher:	DE Press
Editor:
Author(s):	Delilah
Cover Artist(s):	Marianne
Illustrator(s):
Date(s):	online earlier, zined in October 2006
Medium:	print
Genre:	gen
Fandom:	The Sentinel
Language:	English
External Links:	Coming Up For Air online, also maybe at AO3?
Click here for related articles on Fanlore.

cover by Marianne

Coming Up for Air by Delilah is a gen Sentinel alternate universe. The full-size zine has 163 pages and a color cover and 12 b/w drawings by Marianne.

It was net-published as a series prior to the zine publication from DE Press in October 2006 and won a Burton Award in 2003 and 2004.

Summary

Having been disabled by his senses and misdiagnosed as autistic as a child, Jim retreated from the world after being tortured in the guise of 'treatment' by an unethical doctor. Now, years later, a nonverbal, withdrawn Jim is totally reliant on his family for his daily existence until one day fate brings Blair Sandburg into his life. The Cascade PD observer/grad student is determined to help Jim emerge from this self-imposed isolation and rejoin the world once again; but the road back is harder than he ever imagined. Together, can they overcome the obstacles placed in their way and make the Sentinel whole again?

Author's Notes

Posted at the end of the series online:

Took a while, but it looks like I’ve made it to the end. Or at least some end. Hope it is the right one for you. I think it is, at least, for me. Want to say thanks -- I’ve been really overwhelmed at the kind words for what started as a single thrown-together dues’ story for SA – a long time ago. By the time we got here it was definitely not thrown together … which I hope it’s the better for … but it’s hard for me to tell. Anyway, hope you all enjoy it.

Have lots of thanks to share … to Lyn for beta’ing and friendship over-and-above-the-call-of-duty for more than a few years (sheesh … it *has* been years) now. To the Lurkers who have come and (sadly) occasionally gone: I’ve appreciated your welcome and your friendship greatly. To C for workday e-mails and always acting like she’s happy to see unwanted paragraphs pop up in her in-box. To Aly for reading whatever stuff I send her (no matter how painful) and sending me much better fic in return. To everybody that got unwittingly corralled along the way, I always appreciated the help.

Disclaimer: Not mine, never have been, but I have too much fun playing with them to stop now.

[...]

And if I ever suggest titling anything with a gerund again, somebody please slap me.

Parts

• Coming up for Air ("An AU Blair tells of finding a Sentinel a little too late. Blair's an observer with the Cascade PD. Jim is … well … not the Jim you know. Rated PG for language.")
• Paying Karma's Dues ("Second story in AU where Blair's an observer with Major Crimes and Jim's been misdiagnosed as autistic as a child. A little language, as usual.")
• Calling Carl J. ("A long day in the life of Blair Sandburg. A little language, as usual.")
• Living at Fourth and Talmadge ("Blair's bad day stretches into two and only Jim realizes it. Warning for language, as usual.")
• Looking for Unicorns ("While Blair's recovering, Jim tries again to explain about the wolf.")
• Humming Along with the Boss ("Blair tries moving out.")
• Conversing in a Universal Tongue ("Blair searches for an ASL tutor for Jim and one question gets answered.")
• Receiving the Blessings of a Two-Faced God ("Naomi comes for the holidays and Blair does a little contemplating of the gifts of Janus.")
• Dreaming with Borges ("Blair feels like he's disappearing, Jim's drifting further away, and Stephen makes an astounding proposal.")
• Staggering Along the Ruta Maya ("Blair and Jim struggle along their own personal Mayan routes only to end up in the same place.")
• Partaking of the Vine of the Soul ("A frustrated Blair goes native in his attempt to connect with Jim")
• Charting the Waters of the Madre Dios ("Blair and Jim both find a measure of peace and completion when they undertake a journey with Steven to help Jim find his way home. The final chapter.")

Reactions and Reviews

NOTE: some of these comments are for the entire series and some for the online parts posted at the time each story part was published.

Good gen stories in Sentinel are relatively rare - or so I thought - so I was delighted to see a rec for a series on Prospect-L for stories by Delilah. Too often gen stories descend into smarm, but her Coming up for air series doesn't. It's gritty, it's moving, well thought out, and beautifully written. A great Blair, and a Jim you just want to hug. I will be looking out for the rest of the series, for sure. (Her other stories are well worth a look too.)

In this AU Jim never suppressed his senses as a kid, but unfortunately they were treated as a mental illness. I really liked that the scenario unfolded in a way that meeting Blair does not 'fix' Jim. It's more plausible, though a bit depressing. It's from told Blair's POV, which works very well given Jim's condition, but I couldn't help to wonder how Jim perceives the events. So after reading the first I wished for a sequel or a companion piece, and when the second was published I liked it as well (though it's still from Blair's POV). So now I'm hoping that this universe will be continued for some time, a sure sign that the AU works for me: I don't want to leave <g>.

An AU Blair tells of finding a Sentinel a little too late. Blair's an observer with the Cascade PD. Jim is … well … not the Jim you know. Excellently written in first-person POV.

A popular vein among Sentinel alternate universes is what if Jim and Blair hadn't met when they did. It's an easy concept to come up with but a surprisingly difficult one to execute. Many writers have tried it but only a few stand out. Delilah's story is just such a story. Told from Blair's point of view, it gives us a heart breaking look at a James Ellison whose Sentinel abilities were misdiagnosed...as Autism.

*grin* it is one of those absorbing series. I expect we should all email and ask plaintively for more. ;-p

Jim was never able to cope with his senses and lives at home with his family, unable to speak, misdiagnosed as autistic. His only outlet is sculpture. Blair is working as an observer with the police and gets thrown to the wolves when a frantic William Ellison descends on the police department demanding that they do something about his kidnapped son. Blair manages to rescue Jim when no one else can, connecting with him, something no one else has been able to do in twenty years. Jim never gets completely better in the series, but it's still touching.

This is a very sad story. It's an alternative universe story which tells of a might-have-been where "a little too late" is still not worse than "never". Not quite. If you can bear such sadness, with a hopeful ending, this is well worth it. The scenario is made very plausible, and the author managed to repeat her successful chatty style which served so well in her previous story, though this time it's from Blair's point of view, not Jim's -- and not so funny. It would be nice to see a sequel where the hope at the end is actually realized.

This series is beautifully and lyrically written. It has my vote as the best Sentinel story written in the last couple years. Blair finally finds a sentinel, only he's been damaged by improper medical treatment as a child and is in an almost autistic state. Somehow, Delilah manages to convey a non-verbal, barely responsive Jim who is still recognizably Jim and who knows Blair is his guide, when even Blair doesn't know it.

When I saw this at Cascade Library, I said "Hooray, she's done a sequel already!" This is the second in the (hopefully) series of stories started with "Coming Up For Air", and it carries on just as well. The main problem is that it's too short. We want more! I liked the way that the progress that Jim makes is realistically not in leaps and bounds, and the way Blair is just trying so hard, but he can't be there all the time... I know some people can't stand first-person narrative stories (aka the "I-story") -- well, it's your loss, that's all I can say. There are some bits here that just *click*, and other touches that remind you of the problems of being a Sentinel, and the patience that has been cultivated in those who care about Jim... So... what do *you* think?

All right. I wasn't going to read these stories. I'm somewhat picky about AUs and the way they portray the guys, so when I saw the synopsis for the first piece, "Coming Up for Air," that merely stated something to the effect that "Jim is not the Jim you know," I didn't read it. Then Kat posted her review, and I'm very glad (this time) that I let curiosity get the better of me.

These are both delightful reads. Unique enough to keep me engaged, with a sparkling on-going monologue. They remind me of another reason I don't tend to read AUs: If I find I like them, I inveriably want more, and patience is not a virtue I come by easily.

Yes, Kat, "Paying Karma's Dues" was indeed to short.

This is an excellent story, one I'm glad you reviewed. I don't care much for TS fiction, but this (and its preceding story) are excellent.

These stories are far too short, but what we do get is intriguing, wryly witty, and well-written. I'm not usually into AUs (I'll read them and go, oh, that was interesting, and move on), but this is one of two universes that I love reading. The Blair-voice is so much fun to read, and the slow progress of Jim's "coming up for air" is both exciting and frustrating to watch. And there isn't a quick fix to any of it. In short (too short, imo), a really good read.

[Living at Fourth and Talmadge]: This is the fourth in the "Coming Up For Air" series, and it follows so hard on the heels of #3 that I went back and re-read it before I'd gotten more than a couple of paragraphs into this one. "Blair's bad day stretches into two and only Jim realizes it." It's almost hilarious, the way that nobody knows what's really going on with an agitated Jim, with Simon breathing muttered imprecations on Blair's name because nobody can find him... And just the way it's put together, with the bits from a few unusual points of view, I really like it. Actually, I'd like to borrow a word from one of the characters: "Wow!" So... what do *you* think?

[Living at Fourth and Talmadge]: Well, I think I've said before that I really like this particular AU. And I practically bounce in my chair when I see that another installment has been posted. I love the forward progression throughout the series, and again in this one, there's a major breakthrough. My one complaint, and I have no idea how the author would do this, so maybe it's not so much a complaint as a wish, is that I would have liked to have seen some of the action from Jim's point

of view. He's making progress; I'd love to see some of that progress from the "inside." But that's a personal quibble that's not really worth dwelling on. This is one author/series that, if at all possible, I'll drop what I'm doing to read what

new.

When I first started the series a few years ago I wasn't keen on the first installment. I did not want to see Jim vulnerable and near catatonic throughout what I thought may turn into a very long series. The series *was* long, deliciously long. And Jim, even in his seemingly man!child state was strong and brilliant and, later on, I discovered a subtle dry humor that made me smile.

Delilah's Blair is the best portrayal of this beloved character, IMO. She breathes life into a character some tend to make too animated or too sad or too brilliant or too quirky. Blair in this series is the Blair I love, warm, animated, determined, witty, brilliant with a thirst for knowledge - and flawed. Oh yes, and he loves Jim. Big selling point for me.

The last part in the series has been posted and, despite what I think may be a bit of a rushed ending (Jim speaking in broken sentences in a matter of a very short time), I loved it. And I'm not even a fan of the whole shaman, mystical stuff.

And did I mention that Delilah has given me a Steven I absolutely adore? He and Jim are devoted to each other. Indeed, Steven treats Jim with love and, very importantly, respect (so too, of course, does Blair). The fact that he basically turns Jim over to Blair's care and attention says much about his love and devotion to Jim (and, eventually I think, to Blair). Steven and Blair don't always agree what's best for Jim, and I loved that. I laughed when Steven, dismayed over Blair agreeing to Jim's working with the police, grumbled "Why am I talking to you, you're one of them." And Blair's internalizing "Somewhere, Naomi's falling with a thud out of her astral levitation."

This is a gen story and, indeed, beautiful as gen. But one scene/passage in the last part had me wishing for a slash sequel. Jim is in bed reading, almost asleep, when Blair quietly takes the book from his hands and happens to gaze at a passage on the page describing a simple sex scene, and Blair wonders about Jim and intimacy.

"Jim's eyes are drowsy and half-closed and I palm a hand along the short trimmed nap of his hair. I do not know if Jim, the man who can be zoned by the simple delights of natural peppermint and the smell of fresh-baked cinnamon rolls, can ever experience the multi-leveled pleasures of a summer evening's fumble in the backseat. I try to imagine who would have the gentleness and patience to teach Jim how to handle the breadth and depth of physical love. 'Sleep, Jim.' "

And my first thought was - Blair, of course. Who else? :)

I'd like to take each installment and go over every single page. It's an intelligent read, sometimes surreal, between the metaphysical and the contrete. The love between Jim and Blair softly woven in every line and gesture.

I so hope Delilah continues to write for Jim and Blair and that this last installment wasn't some sort of swan song.

<note to self - send feedback> I really enjoyed the series, though I admit 'How Come My Dog Don’t Bark When You Come Around?' is still my favourite of her stories. I liked the lack of mushy sentiment and the fact that Jim's personality was muted but still there... and her Blair and Simon voices are beautiful and a joy :)

Best FF That Supports Gerund Rights. Specifically, Gerund Rights to Appear in Titles. All We Are Saying Is Give Gerunds a Chance. Coming up for Air Series, by Delilah. The Sentinel, gen. First, the caveats: this series is a work in progress, and although each story stands alone fairly well, the last one ends on a cliffhanger. Also, some of the stories need to be beta-read - there's a lot of typo-type errors. But it is definitely worth reading. It's a fascinating extrapolation of the canon; the potential for all of this is present in the series but never explored (or, I suspect, even considered). The minor characters are extrapolated, too; Jim's family is very present, and as much more than just plot devices. Stephen, in particular, is an interesting and complete character here, and Sally gets a lot more time. Bonus: the mystical stuff makes sense. Normally I can only take so much supernatural-shaman-spirit guide blah before I'm ready to move on to something slightly more probable, like why Ron Weasley is really Dumbledore. In fact, I sometimes OD on the whole caboodle in the time it takes to read the words "black jaguar." In this series, though, it makes much more sense and works a lot better than in most stories. And this AU concept just feels right; it's believable in a way the canon sometimes isn't. And for the record, I don't find these stories sad. Oh, didn't I mention that in the warnings? Because, yeah. Everyone I've ever seen mention this series (which is, admittedly, not that many, even though it's a rather famous series) has described it as sad. Disturbing, even. But for once I don't agree, and given that I can tear up over video games and the death of characters who are, technically, cars, that's saying something. (Although I can't tell you whether it's something about the series or about me.) No one dies in this. Nothing that happens is worse or more upsetting than the canon. Jim is different, yes - his senses came fully and permanently on-line when he was six, and that changed him and the course of his life - but I don't see him as even remotely a tragic figure; he is damaged, both by the senses and by some aspects of his family, but that's true of canon Jim, too. To me, this Jim is, if anything, more comfortable and more secure than the one in the canon. But, well, others don't agree with me, so you are hereby warned: this might make you sad. (If it does, please say so in the comments. I'd like to know, and it will serve as a warning to others.)