Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles

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Fanfiction
Title: Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles
Author(s): Grace Ann/proudhousewife
Date(s): August 24 – October 24, 2014
Length: 14 chapters, 13k words
Genre: Adventure/Mystery
Fandom: Harry Potter
External Links: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10644439/1/Hogwarts-School-of-Prayer-and-Miracles

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Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles is a fanfic that rewrites the Harry Potter series with a Protestant Christian slant and many changes to the setting and characters. For example, the events take place in the USA, owls are replaced with angels, Voldemort has a Reddit account, Dumbledore has a wife and is Hermione's father, Snape is head of Gryffindor, etc. It has been called "a fic to rival My Immortal".[1]

The author's description states that "This story has all the adventure of JKR's books; but will not lead your children astray." Readers disagree on whether the fic is satirical or serious. One reader called the author "the literal living embodiment of Beatrix Bloxam"[2], a minor HP character who rewrote The Tales of Beedle the Bard in a "child-friendly" manner, but whose works caused nausea and vomiting.

There are over thirteen thousand reviewer comments on the story on Fanfiction.net, mostly negative.

Hagrid is not a good Christian. For instance, Christ taught us to pray quietly, in a solitary place, not booming our prayers aloud in a "deep thunderous voice." (Mark 1:35, Luke 6:12, etc.). Moreover, with few exceptions (most notably, "Father, take this cup from me..."), Christ prayed not for himself and his own personal gain, but for others. You would have us replace this with the perversion of praying for one's own conveniences (teleportation, e.g.), making the "magic" of this book far more of a denial of goodness and decency than the magic of canon Harry Potter. I find this story to be sinful and you to be a bad influence on children.[3]

The Harry Potter series is a wonderful piece of literature and you are butchering it. I'm a Christian and I find this repulsive, you are not only ruining a piece of literary genius but are promoting sexism, stereotypes and judgement of those who are different to them, which is despicable, especially if you are going to have your children read this.

In the case of evolution it has been proven by modern science and that there is any kind of god or deity has not. If you are telling your children that evolution is not real then they are going to go out into the world without the proper knowledge nessasary for the modern world.

I sincerely hope that you are doing this as a troll or else I will be praying for you to see the error of your ways and that your children are sensible and see past the bigoted things you have written and check out Harry Potter from a library.[4]

The Harry Potter books provide excellent morals for children. Even the wizarding world has good and bad individuals, just like in reality. It teaches doing the right thing, patience, friendship, forgiveness, and sticking to your beliefs in tough times. Bashing atheism is just as bad as bashing theism because no one in this world has concrete proof of their beliefs. Live and let live. I don't even want to begin to tell you how you butchered Hermione's character and filled it with sexist Victorian age poppycock. A strong woman is not sinful. Also, Dumbledore is gay. (If you're a troll, though, thumbs up!)[5]

Guys, please, calm your titties. This is clearly satire and a hilarious one at that. One "bad" fanfic can not ruin an entire series of fantastic books. You're being overdramatic. Author, please keep updating! Like many others I cannot breathe from laughing so hard! It is like God himself has stolen the very breath from my lungs. I feel holier already. God bless.[6]

The only thing that would make this piece of satire better was if it was actually JKR herself trolling the shit out of everyone.[7]

References

  1. ^ Post by Aaron, January 12 2019
  2. ^ Review by ShinigamiRae, August 30 2014
  3. ^ Review by Perspicacity, August 25 2014
  4. ^ Review by Guest, September 13 2014
  5. ^ Review by Guest, September 13 2014
  6. ^ Review by Guest, September 14 2014
  7. ^ Review by but what if, September 19 2014