this city bleeds its aching heart

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Fanfiction
Title: this city bleeds its aching heart
Author(s): Renne
Date(s): June 2013
Length: 34,537
Genre: Slash, Fake/Pretend Relationship
Fandom: Captain America Movieverse
External Links: AO3
Poster art by softesteve (2016)

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this city bleeds its aching heart is a popular fluffy Steve/Bucky fanfic by Renne. It is a canon divergence in which Bucky Barnes, post-Winter Soldier stint, works for S.H.I.E.L.D., though it was written before the premiere of Captain America: The Winter Soldier and does not follow the canon of that movie.

Author's summary:

The one where Steve and Bucky pose as a happily married couple while on a mission for SHIELD, to catch an international arms dealer hiding in a suburban neighbourhood.

Reviews & Reactions

AKA the best fake-married fic to ever fic, [...] 34k of hilarity and anguish and boys having Emotions, and I love love love this Bucky voice, and basically everything about this fic.[1]

i read this for the first time over a year ago. It was the first Stucky fic I ever read. I reread it every so often because this is the fic that gripped me tight and pulled me into this fandom. I thank you every day for writing it not just because it's a great story but because it brought these two idiots into my life and I can't imagine my life without them now. So thank you.[2]

it's almost 4 am and I looked up "best fluffiest fic ever" on google a couple hours ago, because what the heck, and this this came up and I was just curious and ohmygOD THIS WHOLE FANFIC IS SO ADORABLE! *incoherent fangirling noises* I mean, the characters are so excellently in character and all the lines that were just so THEM, and it's wonderfully humorous (fondling the cucumbers, I couldn't breathe) and well-written and creative and emotional (I swear I just spilled some water...yes, I was obviously drinking salt water and it happened to drip down my cheek...), with only minor spelling and grammatical errors (this is an achievement!!!), and I didn't ship this at 11:59 pm yesterday, but now...also, this fic just made me really happy and I love it, and it's one of my favorite fics now (along with pet project by caeria...another ship I didn't think I would ever support until that fic xD) and oh gods they're just beautiful oblivious stupid in-love boys and can you ask for a better Steve-Bucky fic, no you cannot, you greedy connoisseur, stop trying to take things that don't exist...soooo muuuuuuch shiiiiiiiiiiiiip nooooooowwwww *flails on floor*

sorry I know this was written a while ago but...SO GOOD, SO CUTE, I MEAN SOME OF IT IS SO FLUFFY IT'S PRACTICALLY A THROW PILLOW IN A COTTON CANDY MACHINE but <3 anyway :D (by the way, I also love pretend-relationship-turned-real fics, they're so funny and heart-warming when it's late at night/early in the morning and you're just kinda meh on life) [3]

I re-read this and remembered why I love this genre of fic. When people have to pretend to be married and they decide to be so married

so very married

with so.much.pda. It's part of the charm of these fics, but even better were all of their dumb misunderstandings, all of the moments they thought they were getting the bare minimum they needed but the other was doing them a favor. My favorite scene might be when Steve is trying to find Bucky and sees his tags hanging out of the guy's pocket, because without any description of what Steve was doing and just dialogue to go off of, I could see how angry and protective he was and what he was going to do about it.

Them making fun of Coulson was pretty on point to. What a lovely fic! [4]

I have read this so many times now, and it's STILL one of my alltime faves. Every time I read it I fall in love all over again. The whole fake married thing is like, the GREATEST THING EVER and you just totally nail this on the head. There is the perfect amount of tension:pining:sex ratio that makes it squirmingly good. I could re-read this another 40 times and still never get bored. You should be really pleased with this, and your writing style, forever.[5]

Holy Christ this fic is everything I never knew I wanted but did, SO BADLY. Can I send you my hospital fees though? Because this was like a punching bag to my heart over and over. Oh my god, Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes. You two will be the death of me if you keep acting like this.

Oh, let me count the ways this fic broke my heart. When Steve and Bucky kept convincing themselves that the sex was only for the mission and Bucky telling Steve to close his eyes and imagine anyone else (fuuuuuuuuck). when Steve didn't come upstairs when Bucky was waiting for him. (oh, Bucky...) When Steve went down on Bucky with the lights out and didn't want him to reciprocate to show him that this was what /he/ wanted, and not for the mission (okay that was actually super sexy and amazing but then you went and made Bucky FORGET). When Bucky was hurt because he didn't get the backup he should have had (what the actual fuck i was raging--). When they had to move out and lie about the reasons why (ugh send help). When Bucky wanted to keep /his/ house because he filled it with everything that made it his /home/ (oh god dammit I cannot). When Steve learns Bucky bought the rings himself, picked em out himself (just drag me out back and shoot me already, please). When Bucky's nightmares come back because he's not sleeping beside Steve anymore (*incoherent gurgling*). And when Bucky showed up, drunk, at Steve's, and even after confessing, and even after Steve showed him what he wanted, Bucky still wouldn't let himself have the happiness he deserved (i am dead and buried).

I just spewed parts of your fic back at you and you know all this but I really need you to know how much this affected me. And seriously, I couldn't decide between tearing out my hair and crying in a dark corner because, ugh, their love and yearning and fear and self-destructive tendencies and hurt and everything was so palpable. I am in awe at how wonderfully complex Steve and Bucky are here, these two boys from Brooklyn coming alive in your words and the world you've created, and all the ways their relationships unfolds in it. It's not linear--sometimes they're okay, sometimes they're not, sometimes they're really not--but it felt real and true to character, and I loved that. This was beautiful, sweet, romantic, sad, painful, and absolutely brilliant and a delight to read.

(And did I mention scorching hot? because those sex scenes were un-fucking-believable and I am desperately fanning myself for the next 70 years to recover. Just shut up and fuck, stupid oblivious boys.) [6]

Related Works

Further Reading

References

  1. ^ Tumblr rec by luninosity on August 21, 2016
  2. ^ comment by Brobi_Wan_Kenobi on February 2, 2016
  3. ^ comment by theowltardisgirl on May 10, 2015
  4. ^ comment by JoCarthage on September 16, 2015
  5. ^ comment by 74days on October 16, 2015
  6. ^ comment by ecw on Nov 18, 2015
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