Rekindling Fire

K/S Fanfiction
Title:	Rekindling Fire
Author(s):	Jenna Sinclair
Date(s):	2006, 2009
Length:	~32,538 words
Genre:	slash
Fandom:	Star Trek: The Original Series
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Rekindling Fire is a TOS Kirk/Spock story by Jenna Sinclair.

It was published in 2006 in the 2006 Slash Advent Calendar, and in 2009 in the print zine T'hy'la #30.

Summary

"What happens to Kirk and Spock after the events of Star Trek: The Motion Picture."

Reactions and Reviews

For those of us who know this author well, it comes as no surprise when I say that for her own personal reasons, she doesn't necessarily see the six TOS movies as canon. And while I have a difficult time understanding such reasoning, that doesn't mean I can't accept it, especially since I suspect it was why she began her incredible "Sharing the Sunlight" series. I believe it was her way of creating a future for Kirk and Spock which, in her mind, made more sense than what was seen in the six movies. Those rare times, however, when she does choose to write following the actual events on the big screen have produced such unforgettable works such as "Dawn", published in Beyond Dreams 5, and now this amazing post ST:TMP tale. "Rekindling Fire" was written as a favor to a fellow K/Sr and all I can is that after reading it, not only I, but every other K/S fan out there who does same owes this particular K/Sr a huge "thank you". "Fire" is, in my opinion, the best "stand-alone" story this author has penned since "Pacing the Cage." It takes the reader through an unbelievable journey of mistakes made and chances lost, of a threat once thought eliminated unexpectedly returning to claim another victim which, if successful, would tear Kirk and Spock apart in a way Gol and Starfleet never could, of Kirk's determination to vanquish that threat even when it seems there is no chance of victory, of Spock's attempts to make everything all right when everything is all wrong, of despair and desperation, of hope and of trust and of faith, and most especially, of love's refusal to die. I don't think there are any words in the English language I can use that can adequately describe how brilliant I think this story is, although the author knows I did try. So I guess all I can say is that a good New Year's resolution any true K/Sr can make is to read this story as soon as possible. You won't regret it.

Rekindling Fire is a gem, its premise fresh and surprising. It's based on the only ST film I really can tolerate, and it goes into uncharted K/S territory. Not once had I ever contemplated the effects Kolinahr must've had on Spock, how it must've torn him up inside. So I started on this journey with Kirk and Spock with some trepidation. Because I had never been much for first person stories either. But the author drew me in so subtly that I went eagerly and with much anticipation. After the first 3 pages I knew there would be pain, but I also trusted, knowing things would be made right. Never had I ever believed I'd be able to tolerate Kirk and Spock in a meld with another couple either. But, by god, Jenna did it! And I loved it! The last pages, the sharp rendering of the scintillating love scene were so exciting, so intense that my eyes started tearing up and I couldn't read fast enough. It was beautiful and satisfying, everything it should have been—for Will and Ilia and Jim and Spock. Talk about getting fucked clear through to your soul! Yow! My favorite part of course, and it made all the other (slight) angst worth ever word. Terrific! The story satisfied in every conceivable way, colorful, suspenseful, and sensual.

[much snipped]

Jim and Spock once again saved our universe, this time in a very different, very spectacular way. I wonder just what kind of medal Starfleet will give them to commemorate these personal acts of valor! Kissing penises, one with double ridges?! I want one!

So here is incomparable beauty, showing me what happened in this alternate universe after the movie ended. I love it. Love the fact that I can now look at this story in that light. Thanks, Jenna, for the thoughts you put into Kirk's mind concerning god, bubble universes, Kirk's prayer in the lift. For informing and transforming me at this late date in my life. For proving that one can, indeed, teach an old dog new tricks!

“Rekindling Fire" picks up where STAR TREK: THE MOTION PICTURE leaves off.

The first scene in this story has incredible emotional impact. Spock has been ordered back to Vulcan on Starfleet business. Both Kirk and Spock are determined to take what little time they have to speak some truths to each other, complex truths of love and lust and pain and anger. But Spock has one final, devastating truth for Kirk—even as he admits his love for Kirk, he reveals that they can never be lovers. Kirk is reluctant to accept this—but he knows he must have Spock back in his life, on whatever terms that Spock is willing to grant him. When Spock returns from his mission to Vulcan, they have a small interlude of time to pick up the pieces of their friendship. Then an outside force intervenes—a force which almost destroyed Spock before and threatens to do so now.

Jenna's writing is superb and utterly satisfying. She is a master at plotting dramatic, intense, emotionally complex stories. Her stories are so vivid I experience them as if I were watching them on the movie screen.

Several months ago, I wrote in the KSP that this author had turned pro and recently celebrated her first professional publication online. And while I was happy for my dear friend that she was pursuing her dream, I was also a bit sad because the chances of her writing anymore K/S stories was practically nil. So I was surprised and delighted to see her name in the table of contents in this zine. And while the story itself was an older one that had been previously published on the web, that did not take away at all my sheer enjoyment of reading it once again, for it just served to remind me what a brilliant author she is and why she was and is becoming more and more successful with her career as a pro writer.

This story takes place right after the events in ST TMP and is told from a first person point of view, namely Kirk's. That in itself is something most difficult to do, yet this author makes it look easy. It starts out with a message from Starfleet Command, ordering the Enterprise to Vulcan so Spock could play diplomat to his own people on what Kirk knew was simply a PR mission. Yet he has plenty of reasons to be concerned, as he isn't completely sure Spock has given up on the Kolinahr and this might give the Vulcan a chance to try again. Yet he soon comes to realize that his fears are unfounded and along the way, comes to another realization, as well. With Spock back at his side, Kirk wants more than just friendship with the Vulcan, only to discover that due to Spock's decision and almost success to undergo the Kolinahr, anything more than friendship is literally impossible. And as difficult as it is for Kirk to accept this, he has no choice but to do so, for the only other option is for the two to separate again, something neither of them wants. Yet just as both are beginning to accept their "friendship only" relationship, an unexpected and shocking reappearance of V'Ger and the demands it makes of them threatens to destroy not only all that they have, but their very lives, as well.

I wish I could put into words how this and so many other stories by this author tend to move me in ways I just can't explain. The closest analogy I think I could make is if one were searching for gold. Sometimes what you find isn't worth a second glance, sometimes you find a piece or two that is worth keeping, and very rarely you find that priceless nugget that makes all that effort worthwhile. This author's stories are like those priceless gold nuggets - there aren't a lot of them out there, but when you find one, you hold onto it forever. This author's stories serve as a clear reminder as to exactly why I love this fandom so much and I am more than grateful that she lent her tremendous talent to the world of K/S. And even though she has now chosen to take that talent elsewhere, I am forever grateful she has left such a legacy for all K/S fans, present and future, to marvel at and enjoy.

What a joy to reread this exceptional story by one of our most talented K/S authors! I read it online when it was first posted a few years ago, but haven‘t read it since. I‘m glad to see it finally published in a zine since I read my favorite stories more than once in zines, whereas I tend not to do this much online. (It‘s not as comfortable reading at the computer, and I have back problems that too much time at the computer aggravates.) This is one of the most original stories I‘ve ever read set in the aftermath of the movie Star Trek TMP. It‘s told from Kirk‘s first person POV, which can be very difficult to do well. But Jenna is a master of this – in my opinion she hears Kirk‘s voice better than any other writer that‘s attempted first person narration of a story.

After the events in the movie, Spock finally realizes what he has always wanted and needed – Jim Kirk. Kirk has also come to realize that he‘s in love with Spock, something it took the pain of a three year separation for him to understand as well. However, Spock was too good a pupil at Gol. He loves Kirk passionately ('obsessed' is the word he uses when talking to Kirk) but the disciplines of Gol have succeeded in completely divorcing his body from his mind. He wants Kirk, but physically cannot have an intimate relationship with him, much to his great sorrow and regret. Kirk and Spock agree to continue to serve together since they cannot bear the thought of being separated, even though they acknowledge how difficult this will be. Then while on shoreleave together, V‘ger returns and possesses Spock‘s body the way it took over Ilia‘s. Now it wants Spock, but Kirk is determined not to lose him. Jenna comes up with a totally unique plot twist involving the essences of Decker and Ilia that lie within V‘ger and their love for each other that resolves this situation and reintegrates Spock‘s mind and body as well.

I really wish I could do justice to this story and explain better just how unusual and compelling it is, but this LOC will have to do instead. This story is amazing, written by a brilliant author at the peak of her powers. Wonderful writing and a beautiful, powerful story makes ―Rekindling Fire‖ one I thoroughly enjoyed and highly recommend. This is a must read story for all K/S fans!

Continuation of TMP. Post-Gol Spock is incapable of sexual response, resulting in much frustrated!Kirk. Meanwhile, V'ger is not satisfied and comes back for more. Had me in tears at one point (okay, we've established by now that that's not hard to do in the movie-era, but even so...) and contains possibly the weirdest sex scene I've ever read.

Shortly after TMP, Kirk forces Spock to admit his love for him, but he also learns that following Gol, Spock is now disconnected from his physical body and can never express his love in the flesh. But on a cold winter night, V'Ger returns with a vengeance...and will only be appeased in one way. Great Kirk characterization, mature characters, and great UST/UET.

In the hands of a writer like Jenna Sinclair, even a bitter truth holds potential. There is no more bitter knowledge than regret for what might have been. The post-TMP theme she’s chosen for this story is eloquently persuasive: Even as he finally acknowledges the feelings he and Jim have shared, Spock confesses his almost achieving Kolinahr has permanently robbed him of his ability to love. Their discussion of Spock’s revelation is supremely believable; with both convinced their own perception of the truth is the correct one. It’s heart-wrenching to realize how close they’ve come only to be faced with a seemingly unmovable barricade to sharing their love on every level.

Jenna portrays Kirk as a man hailed as a hero but deep down, as one of us. He is a person with doubts and intimate knowledge of self that combine in his own mind to wipe away the veneer of success he’s attained. Kirk’s determination as he tries to convince himself he can have what he so desperately wanted with Spock is shattered with moments of resignation. Fleeing to a remote Canadian resort to experience the Winter Solstice among strangers, Kirk attempts to bury his warring emotions while Spock is assigned a diplomatic assignment to Vulcan. Among other things he admits as he skis the powdery slopes alone is that no space near his friend is safe and no distance is far enough to quench his desire to have Spock near. But as fate (or the Vulcan) would have it, Spock arrives at the lodge and they have a quiet, reflective evening in front of the fire before Kirk walks Spock back down the mountain to his own hotel. A blindingly fast switch from this idyllic setting to appalling danger is so typical of televised Trek and so convincingly described it made me sit up in my chair, almost at attention, all senses in high gear. V’ger has come to claim Spock as its own.

Suspense and fear are the hallmarks of the remainder of the story, which is generous in length. Spock’s life and all they’ve known together are hanging in the balance and we feel every tense moment. Also worthy of note is the fact that a few years behind a desk has not affected Kirk’s ability to outthink and out- maneuver even the most unlikely opponent. This extremely well written drama contains all the elements needed to keep the reader at high alert until the end.

What happens to Kirk and Spock after the events if Star Trek: The Motion Picture? The story takes me on an emotional rollercoaster and your heart breaks for these two.