The Sith Academy

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Name: Welcome to the Sith Academy, a.k.a. The Sith Academy
Dates: July 1999 - December 2001
Type: Fanfiction, humor
Fandom: Star Wars: The Phantom Menace
splash screen entrance to the Sith Academy website. The warning reads: The management accepts no responsibility for physical injuries resulting from careless and indiscriminate use of the Sith Academy, nor for career problems caused by reading the Sith Academy at work. Women who are pregnant or may become pregnant should not touch Propecia, but they may read the Sith Academy, although the management disclaims all responsibility for any premature labor that may result."
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The Sith Academy was a shared universe parodying Star Wars: The Phantom Menace character Darth Maul and modern life as he is trained as a Sith warrior through ordinary day-today activities designed to frustrate and enrage him. The series quickly turned to slash by pairing Darth Maul with a young, and sometimes petulant, love struck Obi-Wan Kenobi.

The series was created by Siubhan and eventually spanned over 200 stories with contributions of fan fiction and art from dozens of fans.[1] Other fan creations followed including tshirts, haikus, a drinking game, and Tarot cards. The series had an editorial policy giving the body of work a more cohesive feel. Fans also ran a mailing list (sithacademy-talk) devoted to the series.

According to one reviwer: "While the first several stories focused on similar plotlines of Darth Maul's simple frustration (usually by being ordered to do something humiliating by Darth Sidious in order to "home his rage and hatred") leading to rising fury and finally a cathartic explosion, a milestone in the [Sith Academy] stories, "Life Lessons at the Sith Academy, Part VI" (#29), marked a drastic change in [Sith Academy] canon with the line "Oh shit, he'd slept with Obi-Wan Kenobi." In writing this line, Siubhan "thought people would get a laugh out of it and move on," but the idea of Padawan and Sith Apprentice slash fiction was appealing enough to her fandom that a total of nineteen "Adult" rated fanfics were submitted to the site in pursuit of this idea, not to mention the less explicit but certainly slashy writings available in the site's general-viewing area. Not all readers appreciated this shift in tone, as was soon revealed in disappointed e-mails to Siubhan, but she decided to accept a narrower audience base in order to avoid censoring the site."[2]

Examples of some of the story themes:

  • Life Lessons at the Sith Academy (or Take That). This first story was written to vent Siubhan's frustration over a driving test. Later targets included air travel, the National Rifle Association, an IRS audit, IKEA stores, and Martha Stewart.
  • Life Lessons at the Sith Academy, Part II, by Siubhan - Darth Maul takes a series of menial jobs
  • Distance Learning, by the Intrepid Housemate MelissaTM - Darth Maul does Tech Support
  • The Shopping Maul, by Joan the English Chick - Darth Maul buys groceries
  • Life Lessons at the Sith Academy, Part IV, by Siubhan - Darth Maul at the laundromat
The first posted Sith Academy illustration by Maya, the Mad Mabolica. She writes: "I drew it on a whim, incorporating several literary motifs from the stories and asked [Siubhan] if she would consider an art gallery. She said yes, and I guess that makes me the original Sith Academy illustrator."
Excerpt from "Take That":
"A true Sith lets his hate flow through him at all times. Exploit the fear of your opponents, and you shall be able to achieve anything."

"Yes, my Master."

"Good, now put your foot on the brake and shift out of park."

Darth Maul obediently did as his Master instructed, and the little hovercraft with the "Student Driver" labels eased into the Coruscant skies.

"Keep an eye on your rear-view mirror," Sidious chided.

"Yes, my Master."

"I want you to ease into that lane of traffic there. Nice and gentle."

"Gentle? But you said..."

"All things in time, my young apprentice. A Sith knows when to wait and when to strike.

"Yes, my Master."

"Okay now, I want you to use the Force to reach out and assess your fellow drivers. Any weaknesses?"

"The old lady in the Edsel."

"Good. How do you feel about her?"

"She's driving too slow in a no-passing zone and she's pissing me off."

"Very good. Let your hate flow through you, wait for a tiny opening in traffic, then pass her illegally and flip her off."

"Shall I lay on the horn, my Master?"

"An excellent suggestion, my apprentice. Yes, honk at her most aggressively."

In 1999, Siubhan gave an interview to the Darth Maul Estrogen Brigade explaining the origins of the Sith Academy: "Q: Where did the idea for The Sith Academy come from? S: A heat-wave. The air conditioning broke at work, and I was probably mildly delirious. As I sat in the company cafeteria, watching the cars whiz by on the highway, I came up with the idea for the first story. I was amused enough by it that I wrote the second one the next day, then the third right after that. I didn't think anything of it. Then a couple other people wrote Sith Academy stories. 151 stories later... I didn't plan this. It just happened."[3]

External Links


  1. The first four stories were written by Siubhan. According to one reviewer: "The fourth SA fanfic, "Sith Academy--the foul apartment lesson" (by Katherine the Art Chick) marked the involvement of outside authors in the SA, and by then the ball was rolling..." The Sith Academy at, accessed October 7, 2011
  2. The Sith Academy at, accessed October 7, 2011.
  3. DMEB Interview: Siubhan by Kristiina, December, 18th 1999, accessed October 7, 2011.
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