|Scope/Focus:||Cobra Starship band members|
|Date(s):||2005 - present|
|See also:||Decaydance, Fueled By Ramen, Bandom|
|Click here for related articles on Fanlore.|
Gabe headed for the arid wastelands of the Arizona desert to contemplate his existence.
In the desert, Gabe spends his days and nights pondering the nature of being, the collective unconscious, the irreducible complexity of bacteria flagellum, and perfecting blue steel--it's more of a softer look; he uses it for footwear.
However, every evening his meditations are interrupted by mysterious lights plaguing the night sky. On one particular such night, the lights are so mesmerizing that Gabe enters into a trance-like state. He becomes catatonic and weightless, so weightless in fact that he begins to levitate. But just as Gabe is beginning to lift off the ground, a cobra lunges from the depths of the darkness and bites him! Bites him right in the ******* neck!
After a week on the brink of death, hallucinating from the venomous bite, he awakes to find the snake with a wet towel in its fangs, patting down Gabe's sweltering forehead.
"Holy ****," Gabe exclaims, "this snake that almost killed me is patting down my forehead with a moist towelette!"
"Good morning to you too," says the reptile.
"Holy ****! A talking snake!"
"I am a cobra," corrects the snake, "and the lights that have hounded you night after night are from the starship that brought me here. You see, I have been sent from the future to find you."
"Me?" Gabe asks, flattered and excited at the possibility of validating his existence. "Am I supposed to save the world!?"
"Uh, no," replies the cobra. "Not exactly. You see kid, there is no salvation." The cobra goes on to tell Gabe about the world's final days. Cobras were the only ones who survived.
Shocked by this tale of Armageddon, Gabe finally asks in bewilderment, "then what do you need me from me? What is my destiny?"
"The purpose of your life is to make sure mankind goes out in style."
"How do I do that?"
"By teaching hipsters to not take themselves so seriously and by telling emo kids to stop being pussies. How's that for a start?"
"Gabe Saporta/everyone ever" is a good description of CS fandom's shipping habits. The most popular ships are crossovers with other Bandom bands, such as:
- You Have My Heart (in your hands) by rsadelle. Victoria finds out her boyfriend's cheating on her. Then she finds out she's pregnant. Cobras are never alone, and Gabe's there every step of the way. Gabe/Victoria.
- Repent At Leisure by rsadelle. Gabe and Victoria are drunk when they get married, and they aren't in love, but they make it work anyway. Gabe/Victoria.
- Sheepish Wolves (just don't put your teeth on me) by paperclipbitch. Crossover with My Chemical Romance and others. In which Victoria is tired of being a teenage girl and a werewolf, Greta learns about life from teen movies, Gabe doesn’t give up easily (or at all), and Victoria isn’t the only one with a secret... First in a series. Gabe/Victoria.
- Projekt Gayhem by jedusaur. Gabe gen where he has to learn the rules of being a hipster.
- Too Fast for Love by romantical. h/c while touring for Hot Mess. Gabe's making terrible choices, blowing out his voice, and relying on Ryland a lot. Gabe/Ryland.
- We're Like Magnets by adellyna. Gabe/William.
- If Only I Were a Painter, I'd Paint for You the Moon by foxxcub. Gabe/William WWII AU.
- Congruence by AirgiodSLV. They’ve made it this far. If they were going to fall apart, they would have done it already.. Gabe/Mikey Way, Gabe/Mikey/William Beckett.
- Make The Season Bright by adellyna, set in AirgiodSLV's Tis The Season verse. Ryland/Pete Wentz.
- Out Where the Sand's Turning to Gold by inlovewithnight. Gabe/Gerard Way AU.
- You Are My Lucky Star, read by fire-juggler, Gabe/Pete.
- After the First Midtown Show, read by argentumlupine and dapatty. Gen.
- Bury This Town, read by dapatty. Greta/Vickty-T.
- Every Minute of the Day, read by melusina. Gabe/William.
- Gabe Saporta/Cobra Starship primer by dreamofthem (April 2007)
- Cobra Starship Picspam of Fucking Doom by ladysorka (October 2007)
- Cobra Starship Primer by mercurybard (March 2008) (broken images)
- G-A-B-E gonna get you high! by lessthangreat (January 2008) (archived; broken images)