Be My Valentine (Professionals story)

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Bodie/Doyle Fanfiction
Title: Be My Valentine
Author(s): Gwyneth Rhys
Date(s): March 1996
Length:
Genre: slash
Fandom: The Professionals
External Links: online here

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Be My Valentine is a Professionals slash story written by Gwyneth Rhys. It was published in Nudge, Nudge, Wink, Wink 4 by Manacles Press in 1995. The story was reviewed for Valentine's Day at ci5hq on February 11, 2010.[1] as well as at the crack-van on March 17, 2004.

Author's summary: "Bodie hates holidays, and everyone knows it. So who's sending him gifts of love?"

Reaction and Reviews

Valentine's Day stories don't abound in Pros, but this is a fine example of how a somewhat unapt (for CI5 agents) theme can work. It's light and charming, mushier than this author usually writes, but avoids over-the-top sappiness. A grumpy Bodie wants nothing to do with Valentine's Day:

Bodie generally hated holidays, anyway, but at least he could swallow Christmas and things of that nature. They represented something real. But bloody Valentine's Day...well, it really was bloody, wasn't it? Named for some geezer who got his hands cut off.

...but someone is courting him anyway. Gwyn is a stylish writer and this story is just plain fun.[2]

Loved "Be My Valentine" and "Stealing Home" (Okay, I know the authors are my Seattle pals, but still, I can say in a quite unbiased fashion that these are *good* stories. Honest. Trust me.) [3]

It would be difficult to write a fic stuffed with any more pink-wrapped, heart-shaped, chocolatey and bubbly but anonymous Valentine's goodies, perfect for a romantic wallow. Except that Bodie is feeling singularly unromantic about it... Does just reading this fic make you go all weak at the knees and dewy-eyed? Or are you a Bodie?.[4]

I'm a Bodie. Words cannot express how deep my loathing for this fic is. Oh, it's well-written enough and the boys are (vaguely) recognisable from canon, but the central premise makes me want to stab knives through my computer screen.

Thing is, it's the author using the fic to prove Bodie (and by extension all the rest of the many, many people who hate, loathe and abhor valentines day) to be utterly wrong. That really this cynical, commercially-motivated fake festival is a wonderful thing because Doyle is courting Bodie in an OTT, stereotypical way (which doesn't consider Bodie's character, likes, preference or gender in the least).

I don't like fics that push agendas like that (particularly when they're agendas I don't agree with!) and this one is nowhere near well-enough written to make up for the schmoopy message.

Feh. I'm gonna go and read some darkfic now to take the taste away.[5]

I didn't see the same agenda as you. If anything I thought she was OTT in Bodie's rejection of all things Valentine, even holidays in general! And Doyle's efforts didn't actually work, just left him feeling increasingly embarrassed (and rightly so). The premise seemed to me to be to write a fic about Valentine's day that would bring the lads together, while throwing in every Valentine's day 'tradition' on the way. I didn't get a strong feeling of whether the author genuinely liked Valentine's day. It seemed more like an exercise in writing (you'll glean from this I am not struck on the characterisation, esp. of Doyle).[6]

Oh, interesting - I totally didn't get that agenda either... I did think Bodie's reaction was pretty out of character - and the idea of Doyle doing any of that was even more out of character, and Valentine's Day isn't called a holiday here, and... just... gargh! The whole set-up was so American I wanted to cry (Valentine's in America is kind of fun, in a pink commercial kind of way, but not at all what it's like over here...) But I didn't get the agenda... *g* [7]

No, this was not in character for Doyle...but really Bodie wasn't believable either. Mostly Valentine's Day fics in Pros just don't work for me because I just can't see either lad being this mushy or sentimental. It's not only not British, it's not how tough guys behave. And whatever the lads are, they are certainly tough...blokes.[8]

I read it for mindless entertainment, so it was fine. I can't say I'd run to read it again, but it sure isn't the worst fic I've ever read. It was just a Valentine's Day story. I like getting the lads together, so I was happy. But then, even though I don't celebrate Valentine's Day now that the kidlets are grown, I don't have the dislike of it that a lot of people do. And mush works for me. Much better than one of the lads raping the other. Trust me, I'll take the hearts and flowers any day. I prefer love to hate any day. But I'm silly that way.[9]

And say that I love this silly, stupid, not quite in character, text about the lads. Because when you're feeling down and read this you suddenly feel much better.. well *I* do at least. It's one of my, it can only get better, fics. And I just love the beginning when Bodie's thinking about all the bad things about V-day. *giggle* [10]

Right from the first sentence I can't see Bodie in this story.

He isn't the type to be angry about 'everything' – about a flower shop, the parking, February and Valentine's Day. He wouldn't make a fuss about something like that. And we've seen in the episodes that he absolutely 'uses' the power of flowers to calm down his girlfriends. And Doyle surveying Bodie from afar is for me very unbelievable as well! And all the pressies... I don't think that the story is funny - but I had to laugh about one of Doyle's reflections about his last girlfriend: "...but she hung on like many women seemed to, hoping for a change." LOL! What is HE doing? Everybody would run away crying, if a woman would behave like Doyle in a fic...

That all isn't too bad... - but nothing to reread for me.[11]

I've got to admit, this fic totally doesn't work for me - I think mostly because it's an American story with our lads shoe-horned into it. Valentine's Day isn't a "holiday" over here (which is extra annoying cos she's obviously made the effort to get other Brit-isms right!) and I just really really can't see either of the lads reacting to it the way that they do... Doyle would never use Valentine's Day as a way to show his love to Bodie, especially if he knew that Bodie hated it. But I can't see Bodie actually hating it either - he'd see it as a way to finally get some recalcitrant bird into bed at last, and he'd totally be boasting about how many flowers and cards and boxes of chocolates had been left for him... He enjoys life, so... I can see Doyle being grumpier about it, to be honest - he's got that social conscience going on, so it might have worked a bit better for me the other way around, but... Hmmn! [12]

I loved it. Silly fluff that cheered me up! Especially after the recent diet of rape and dark fics that I seem to have found, which were not what I wanted for a gloomy February. No heavy agenda - just fun! [13]

I'm struggling a bit with this story, and I don't even know if I can explain why. I don't think I can see Doyle behaving like this, organising all those gifts and then being shy and sad about it. And although I'm a lover of slash, I'm not sure I can see Bodie reacting in that way either. It's sweet and well written, but it's not 'my' Bodie and Doyle.[14]

As an overall comment, I find it interesting that this sort of behaviour between the lads is soundly dismissed as silly, unimaginable, and trite. Yet a story with Bodie stalking Doyle, planning his death, raping him, etc. is found to be profound and indepth, an exploration of a character driven to the edge. I'll never understand it. Give me Doyle like this than Bodie as a rapist/murderer/psycho. Sorry, but we all have our tolerance levels, and I clearly have mine. So why are people so turned off by love and so enamoured with cruelty? [15]

References

  1. ^ reference link.
  2. ^ recced at Crack Van, March 2004
  3. ^ In 1995, Alexfandra posted a brief review of the zine as part of her ZCon convention report sent to the Virgule mailing list. It is reposted here with her permission.
  4. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq, Archived version
  5. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq
  6. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq
  7. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq
  8. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq
  9. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq
  10. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq
  11. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq
  12. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq
  13. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq
  14. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq
  15. ^ 2010 comments at CI5hq